


Rebuilding Oneself

by Rosemary_and_Time



Series: Winding Roads (SMP AU) [3]
Category: Dream SMP - Fandom, Minecraft (Video Game), Video Blogging RPF
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Best Friends, Blood and Injury, Dave | Technoblade and Wilbur Soot and TommyInnit are Siblings, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Family Bonding, Family Dynamics, Fluff and Angst, Gen, Ghost Wilbur Soot, Good muffins, Hurt/Comfort, Implied/Referenced Abuse, Platonic Relationships, Skeppy and Badboyhalo are best friends, Sorta for a minute, Team as Family, Toby Smith | Tubbo & TommyInnit Friendship, TommyInnit Swears (Video Blogging RPF), Violence
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-12-11
Updated: 2021-01-15
Packaged: 2021-03-10 21:22:13
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 15
Words: 49,403
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28013886
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Rosemary_and_Time/pseuds/Rosemary_and_Time
Summary: Wilbur is alive.  Again.  No one knows how, least of all him.Well, to be fair, Wilbur Soot doesn’t remember much of anything.  His return tears open old wounds and upsets the very balance of the world they live in.A direct sequel to “An Impossible Choice” but can stand aloneorWilbur is back and all hell breaks loose.How can his family recover from the terrible things he's done when he can't even remember doing them?
Relationships: Antfrost & Clay | Dream & GeorgeNotFound & Darryl Noveschosch & Sapnap, Clay | Dream & Darryl Noveschosch, Clay | Dream & Dave | Technoblade, Clay | Dream & GeorgeNotFound & Darryl Noveschosch & Sapnap, Clay | Dream & GeorgeNotFound & Sapnap (Video Blogging RPF), Clay | Dream & Phil Watson (Video Blogging RPF), Clay | Dream & Toby Smith | Tubbo, Clay | Dream & TommyInnit (Video Blogging RPF), Darryl Noveschosch & Toby Smith | Tubbo, Dave | Technoblade & Phil Watson (Video Blogging RPF), Dave | Technoblade & Toby Smith | Tubbo & Wilbur Soot & TommyInnit & Phil Watson, Floris | Fundy & Wilbur Soot, No Romantic Relationship(s), Platonic affection is good, Sleepy Bois inc are family - Relationship, THEY'RE BEST FRIENDS - Relationship, Toby Smith | Tubbo & TommyInnit, Toby Smith | Tubbo & TommyInnit & Phil Watson, Toby Smith | Tubbo & Wilbur Soot, TommyInnit & Phil Watson (Video Blogging RPF), Wilbur Soot & TommyInnit, Zak Ahmed & Darryl Noveschosch, platonic - Relationship
Series: Winding Roads (SMP AU) [3]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2049288
Comments: 347
Kudos: 473





	1. Waking

**Author's Note:**

> This story is a direct sequel to 'An Impossible Choice'  
> Some world mechanics/world building is only lightly re-explained.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Someone wakes up  
> Something isn't right

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here we go!

Someone drifted through the comfortable wooden walls of the warm home on the coast. Some parts of the house were more or less well built, but despite its chaotic structure, it fit the family living inside snugly. Even the Watcher thought the house felt like… like someone wrapping you in their arms tightly. Like they watched the family do when one of them was upset. The Watcher couldn’t remember ever experiencing that, but they imagined it was nice. 

The Watcher couldn’t remember ever touching anyone. 

Today the Watcher was being especially observant, the family was acting peculiar and they didn’t know why. All four of them were moving slower than normal. There were few of the characteristic bursts of laughter or smiles from the group all morning. They seemed to be preparing for something.

The two youngest members of the family were especially subdued. The Watcher couldn’t identify their emotions very well, but they seemed lost. Like they were thinking of something far away. The small brunette, who the Watcher had mentally nicknamed Bee Boy, was fussing around with his hair in front of a mirror. The tall blond was noticeably quiet, usually the arguments of the Angry Child were the only words loud enough for the Watcher to hear through the haze they experienced. Instead, the Angry Child just fussed with his shirt, buttoning and unbuttoning it, tucking it in then pulling it back out again.

That was another thing the Watcher noticed; the whole family was dressed unusually. It was like they were wearing their nicest clothes. The Warrior, a piglin hybrid who was older than the boys, wasn’t wearing armor for once. Even in the house he usually would be wearing a chest piece at least. But today all armor had been neatly hung on a rack in his room. He wore a simple white shirt, and his ever-present robe. The Watcher didn’t have any context to understand these events, and since they couldn’t be heard or seen, it wasn’t like they could just ask.

The Watcher floated through the wall to the front room of the house, curiosity getting the best of them as they sought out the eldest member of the family. Though the older blond wore essentially the same clothes as every day, the robes were cleaned and even the white and green hat seemed freshly pressed. The Watcher knew time had passed since they found themselves in this home, but they had no concept of how much. One thing remained constant however, whenever they laid eyes on the eldest member of the family the same word sprung to mind. 

Today the man the Watcher knew only as ‘dad’ looked solemn. Occasionally there was a flash of pain in his eyes as he got ready. 

Eventually, called by some unknown signal, the family gathered to the door and left. The Watcher could only follow the group with their eyes until they were out of sight. Any attempts to leave the house resulted in the Watcher losing themselves for a time, before regaining awareness back in the home. The Watcher had stopped trying to understand a while ago, though they wished they could follow the family wherever they were going. Seeing them sad always made the Watcher feel… something. Something unpleasant and painful. It made the Watcher wish they could wrap whoever was hurting up in their arms and comfort them. 

With an inaudible sigh the Watcher drifted deeper into the house. Nothing to do but wait. Maybe when the family got home they could figure out what was going on. The Watcher passively let themselves follow the hallways of the house, a pacing pattern born of habit when there was no one to watch. Left to the living room, right to the kitchen, past the backdoor, right up the stairs, left to the bedrooms, right to the bathrooms, then round the corner back to the stairs. Several repetitions later the Watcher heard a sound from downstairs. Forgoing the usual path, the Watcher let themselves sink through the floor expecting to see the boys or the Warrior or—

They were not expecting to drop down directly in front of a stranger. The Watcher froze staring at the unusual face in front of them. The person was tall, even taller than the Angry Child, but all their other features were hidden. They wore a mask, white and oval with a simple smile and two dots for eyes as the only decorations. The rest of their form was obscured by a bright green hoodie and practical looking pants. The Watcher noticed they carried several weapons on their belt. No one ever carried weapons in this house. This person didn’t belong here.

As the Watcher stared at the newcomer, they realized they were feeling an emotion they had a name for. They felt helpless. This person could hurt the family, and there was nothing the Watcher could do. 

“There you are! I finally found you.” The Watcher jolted. The male voice must have come from the masked person, but, how could they hear it? Even when the Angry Child yelled, they could barely make out one or two words. But this person spoke clearly, as if piercing a heavy veil. 

“This shouldn’t be possible…” It was impossible to tell where the masked man was looking, but his head alternated between pointing at a device on his wrist and pointing directly at the Watcher. The Watcher slowly started to float backwards, something about this was unsettling. 

“Wait! Don’t move! I’ve just found your location I need you to stay still.” The Watcher froze…

“Can… can you see me?” They weren’t sure if their voice was working. The Watcher did their best to form words, but even they couldn’t hear them. 

“Just, just wait okay? I’ve got an idea that might work…” The masked figure typed frantically into their device. “If I… and put this here… just focus… you’ve got this… YES!”

The Watcher jolted in surprise when Smiley Face yelled. 

As they listened, a strange sensation started overtaking them. The Watcher felt as if their very essence was being tugged, pulled, stretched. They felt a tingling sensation, and were surprised to feel at all. The pulling continued. The sensation that something had a grip on their innermost self and was dragging it along.

It hurt.

They felt.

They shattered.

* * *

Someone opened their eyes suddenly… only to shut them again tightly against the intruding light. The person who no longer watched focused on what they could feel. Feel… They could feel.

There was something touching their hands… it was prickly and soft all at once. The person brushed their hands over it, feeling the stalks bend under the pressure. 

_Grass, soft on their face as they rolled down a hill_

The word jumped to mind unbidden. They knew it was right. 

What else? There was a brushing feeling against their face, but nothing was there…

_Wind, pushing against them while they stood on a ledge_

Delighted by their discoveries the person who no longer watched decided to attempt opening their eyes again. Slowly squinting against the bright light… It was filtered through green and brown that hung above them. 

_Sun, warming their arms as they emerged from darkness_

_Trees, running between trunks and dodging branches_

The person realized they were laying on their back. As they started to sit up, they heard voices, clear from somewhere out of sight.

“What the heck does Dream think he’s doing having us just wait out here?” The first voice was rough and loud, pitched up and down throughout the sentence. 

“Does it even matter? He tells us to wait out here then all the coms on the server go down. It can’t be a coincidence.” The second voice was softer and higher toned, but equally skeptical. 

“That’s what I’m saying! That green idiot is up to something and we’re just standing around world spawn like a bunch of nimrods!” The figure didn’t know what these two were arguing about, but they decided to attempt to approach them anyway. There wasn’t anything besides a weird wall and some trees surrounding them, so might as well seek out the voices. 

The voices were coming from a gap in the wall, just big enough for a person to slide through. The one who had watched ducked to get through and straightened up on the other side. 

The person’s first realization was that either they were tall, or these two were short. Probably not a helpful thought in the long run, but it was good to know. 

“Wha...”

“No. Freaking. Way.”

The two young men stared at him with wide eyes and open mouths. 

_Surprise, shock, looking at a paper filled with names and numbers, disbelief_

“Wilbur?” The softer voiced one spoke again, pushing his round glasses with wide white rims up on his forehead. The glasses had a slight red tint to the lenses.

“Hello? I don’t know… ummm… hello.” The watcher struggled to form words; throat rusty from disuse. He was pleasantly surprised to realize they could hear him.

“No. No way this is happening! I mean you’re-- Wilbur is dead! Like really, truly dead.” The other man had raven black hair and a thick white ribbon holding it out of his eyes. As he spoke, he gesticulated wildly, frantically glancing from him to the other man. 

“Do you know me?” The tall man questioned them quietly, they seemed to know him, but… he didn’t remember.

“Yeah, how couldn’t we know you? You’re Wilbur Soot.”

Wilbur had to lean heavily against the wall as a rush of faces and sound overwhelmed his mind. People calling his name, cheering, shouting, whispering, crying. “Wilbur, Wilbur Soot, Wil” 

The faces and voices were gone as quickly as they had come, but the knowledge remained. 

“I am Wilbur… I don’t remember but… I know.” Wilbur hadn’t realized the man with the glasses had moved forward to steady him until he spoke.

“What don’t you remember? Do you even know us?” 

“No… Should I know you? I suppose you must know me but, I really don’t recognize you at all.” Wilbur was pleased with the realization of his name, it was nice to be able to refer to oneself without using random adjectives. Both men in front of him continued to stare. 

“Okay…….. I’m going to message Dream. Coms are back up now anyway.” The darker haired man was fussing with the device on his wrist.

The slighter of the two chuckled awkwardly. “I’m George and this is Sapnap. Uh… we are friends with Dream, do you remember him?” George, as Wilbur now knew, had taken a step back uncomfortably. He pulled his glasses back down over his eyes and fidgeted.

“No, sorry. Doesn’t ring any bells.” Wilbur shook his head. He realized he probably should be bothered by the knowledge that he apparently has lost his memories, but felt rather apathetic about the whole thing. 

The group of three stood around awkwardly, no one attempted any further conversation while Sapnap typed. Finally, he growled under his breath and turned to George in annoyance. 

“That idiot knew this might happen! Didn’t even warn us. Listen he says to take Wilbur to L’Manburg or something, find him somewhere to stay.” Sapnap was clearly upset at this Dream person. Wilbur watched passively as the two discussed his fate.

“Can we just take him to Philza?”

“Nope! Dream says we have to keep this a secret. Something about his memories.”

“Uhhg why can’t things ever be simple?” 

The two continued to argue over where to take Wilbur; Wilbur enjoyed the fading sunshine. He thought that perhaps he should be more concerned, but neither man seemed hostile. At least, not towards him. Wilbur chuckled unconsciously as the two continued to raise their voices in argument. Eventually Sapnap turned towards George with a mischievous grin.

“Wait. I know the PERFECT person we can leave him with.”

* * *

Fundy was having a good evening. Got some work done on his new house, left a prank for Eret, and did his laundry. It really was the ideal night. Was being the operative word. 

When Sapnap and George had knocked on his door he wasn’t even too upset at the disturbance. Well. Until they dumped an amnesiac on him and told the fox hybrid it was his responsibility to keep him safe. Oh, and secret. Can’t forget that. Fundy didn’t realize he was grumbling and growling under his breath until Wilbur spoke up.

“What was that?” 

“Nothing. Here’s your bed, just stay here tonight okay? We’ll find somewhere else in the morning.” Fundy turned and left his uninvited guest in the spare bedroom. As he stalked down the hall, he was aware of his tail flicking in irritation. Really, who did they think they were sticking him with Wilbur Soot after all this time? Fundy flopped down on his own bed and groaned. It wasn’t that he didn’t want to help but… This was a tall order for anyone, and the fox hybrid didn’t think he was equipped to deal with his old friend-turned-enemy coming back from the dead. 

Much less coming back from the dead with no memories. How was he even functioning? Dude barely remembered his own name. 

Fundy tried to settle down, to let Wilbur Soot be future Fundy’s problem, but that wasn’t in his nature. Fundy was crafty. He couldn’t let a puzzle go unsolved. So, despite himself, he found himself brainstorming solutions long into the night. 

* * *

Wilbur was bored. Like painfully bored. It was odd, because Wilbur remembered floating through the home for a long time and never feeling this way. But now, seated in the front room of Fundy’s house, he was restless. 

Wilbur held a book in his hands carefully. The first morning he was here Fundy had given him it as a sort of journal. To help him keep track of what he remembers. He also used it to keep track of important things that Fundy or Dream have told him that he hasn’t remembered yet. 

With a sigh he opens it, nothing better to do then try to remember some more.

Things to remember:

  * I died 6 months ago
  * I have a family
  * I was president, but lost an election (no one will talk about that)
  * I fought a war
  * I think I’m responsible for blowing this area up (Fundy let it slip by accident)



Wilbur chose to think on the last one. He spent several hours a day just thinking and trying to remember things. It wasn’t working. Sometimes he would get flashes of memory, but they were brief and situational. It was all so frustrating.

Wilbur only managed to focus for half an hour before being driven to restlessness. He didn’t understand why he had to stay inside all the time. During the night sometimes he and Fundy would take walks, but never when there were other people around. Sometimes Wilbur had a dark suspicion that people wouldn’t be happy he was alive, otherwise, why not tell everyone?

But Fundy and Dream both seemed fine with him. So, Wilbur Soot tried not to worry. Fundy also had spent a lot of time on brewing new potions, he seemed to think he could help Wilbur regain memories with them. Out of boredom, Wilbur decided to go visit the fox hybrid in his brewing room. He strolled down the stairs into the poorly lit basement. 

Fundy stood hunched over a brewing stand and some papers, deep in thought. His ears were tipped forward intensely as he focused, and his tail barely moved, only occasionally swaying softly from side to side. Other than the ears and tail, Fundy looked pretty much human, his hair was brown with ginger undertones and his face had a bit of scruff from forgetting to shave. 

“Hello furry!” Wilbur greeted Fundy brightly, unfortunately for the fox hybrid, one of the only memories he had of Fundy was calling him a furry with a blond kid. Since this obviously annoyed Fundy to no end, Wilbur used the nickname whenever possible. 

“No! Whatever you want, the answer is no.” Fundy was no-nonsense today apparently. Wilbur frowned exaggeratedly.

“But Fundy….. I’m bored…” Wilbur knew he sounded like a petulant child, but he didn’t care. Maybe he could annoy Fundy into taking him out. 

“Wilbur, no! Listen I’ve only got an hour to work on this then I agreed to help Quackity do some more repairs of L’Manburg.” Fundy waved his hand at Wilbur dismissively.

“Then let me come along! You said I blew everything up right?” Fundy winced at the reminder of his admission “So let me help repair it!” 

“I can’t just--” Fundy finally looked up at Wilbur’s face, ears flattened to the side in annoyance. “Okay fine, if you can stay here and stay out of my fucking way until this evening, then I’ll bring you along to do some repairs after everyone has gone to bed. Can you handle that?” 

Wilbur grinned happily and shook the other man’s hand. 

Finally, something to do around here.

* * *

Fundy had to constantly remind himself that the tall brown-haired man wasn’t the Wilbur he had known. Sure, it was technically the same person, but without most of his memories Wilbur was a shell of his former self. Fundy grunted as he carried another stack of wooden planks to the forming platform. 

Wilbur stood on the edge of the scaffolding, looking out at the reforming city in awe. A smile graced Fundy’s face despite his annoyance at the other man’s lack of assistance. In some ways it was almost nice. It was like having a more innocent, childlike Wilbur, a far cry from the paranoid aggression Wilbur had shown towards the end. 

It still made him nervous having him out here though. Not just because someone could see him, but for his own safety. Despite it having been a couple of weeks Wilbur still hadn’t managed to set a spawn. Fundy had checked the respawn runes again and again; they were perfect, the issue was Wilbur. Dream said this might be the case, but it was still concerning. Sure, L’Manburg was entirely lit up and should be safe from any hostile mobs, but Fundy still kept an eye out as he worked. 

Fundy was helping set the foundations for the new town. Since there was a massive crater in the center, this involved a lot of platforms. It certainly didn’t help that he was having to do this work in the middle of the night. Despite Wilbur’s promises of help, he seemed much more invested in looking around, and Fundy had given up on trying to get him to do any meaningful labor. 

“Come on! We’ve got to get another load of lumber.” Fundy called out to the taller man, trying to get his attention. Eventually Wilbur turned and followed him. Since Wilbur was so interested in looking around Fundy decided to humor him. 

“Look, we’ll go this way. See over there is the party island, Karl has been repairing that. And there’s the new houses, where Quackity lives.” The impromptu tour paused as Fundy approached the oldest structure in L’Manburg.

“and this is the old camarvan.” Fundy continued walking, stopping as he realized the other man wasn’t following. When Fundy looked Wilbur was frozen in front of the caravan, eyes wide.

“Fundy, Fundy I remember! The Hto Dog Van! We were making drugs and then… I remember L’Manburg!” Fundy rushed to Wilbur’s side and steadied him as the taller man swayed. 

“I remember that I was President, and people were cheering on top of that van. We, we were so happy and proud.” 

* * *

Wilbur moved dreamily around L’Manburg, passively following Fundy in his chores. He could remember so little, but he knew where he was, he knew that this country was important. The details were still fuzzy for him, but he was overjoyed for what memories he had regained. 

He couldn’t help but stare at the Hto dog van every chance he got, the rush of memories had faded in intensity, but he still reveled in the images, the experiences. Reassuring himself they were still there. 

Wilbur was so lost in reliving his memories that he didn’t hear Fundy shouting at him, well, until he got shoved roughly to the ground. 

A huge dark shape swept through the spot Wilbur had filled moments before. A screech tore through the night as Fundy’s axe tore through its arm. The creature vanished in a strike of purple particles as Fundy carefully spun, watching the area.

“What the hell Wilbur! You had to go stare at a fucking enderman?”

“Uhhhh… a what man?”

“Are you telling me that you don’t—” Fundy’s outrage was cut short as the enderman reappeared nearby and rushed towards Wilbur again. Fundy intercepted it, catching a long-clawed hand with his shield and swinging his axe into its leg. The creature again vanished in a crack of purple energy. 

“Come on!” Fundy dragged Wilbur underneath the closest platform, warily watching, waiting. Moments later the enderman rushed in from the side, fortunately it couldn’t reach them. Wilbur noticed that the tall creature seemed to have very limited flexibility, and couldn’t bend down to get underneath the structure. That didn’t stop it from swiping its long arms towards them, but it allowed Fundy to get a couple more hits in. Finally, Fundy made the decisive move, he sidestepped the swinging claws and swung his axe deep into the creature’s side. This time the creature shrieked before it vanished, poofing out of existence and leaving only a green round eye on the stone floor. 

Fundy seemed to relax, slowly hanging his axe back on his belt. 

“Dude, Wilbur, endermen are like one of the most deadly mobs in existence. How could you forget something that can literally fucking kill you?” 

Wilbur could only shrug at the fox hybrid ruefully. Truthfully, he sometimes felt poorly for how little he could remember, but he couldn’t control it. 

“Okay well, don’t look at their beady purple eyes. They leave you alone if you don’t mess with them, and so long as you don’t look at them. Dammit endermen are rare, how did you even manage to stare at one from this distance?” Fundy continued his disgruntled tirade and Wilbur eventually decided there was no more useful information to be had, and promptly tuned him out. 

The two continued laying out more decking, but Fundy seemed tired and decided it was time to clean up and go in for the night. Wilbur didn’t want to go back in the house, but truthfully, he was tired too, and after making Fundy fight something for him he figured it was best to be compliant. 

As they walked with their tools, Wilbur heard a weird staticky noise from somewhere out of sight. He paused, and just in time too. Another enderman charged out of an alley, long claws slicing the air and sharp teeth bared menacingly. Wilbur had just enough time to dodge backwards when it struck. Fundy leaped into action. The enderman caught a nasty cut on its shoulder, but shrugged it off with a screech, swinging an arm at the fox hybrid. The blow caught Fundy across the chest and launched him into a stone wall. He sat on the ground stunned. 

This time the enderman wasn’t going to be so easily distracted it seemed, rather than switching targets when Fundy fell it focused on Wilbur as he backed up, ready to strike. 

It drew back it’s clawed arm in preparation.

Wilbur tensed for a killing blow.

A clash sounded from centimeters in front of him. Wilbur peered up as someone caught the enderman’s claws on their sword, parrying the blow. The tall figure beat back the enderman, and after many teleports and charges, killed it. 

The tall figure turned, eyes hidden by dark glasses and face concerned.

“Something is seriously wrong here.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> First chapter!!!  
> I've got a lot written for this story, and trust me it gets better from here. This is actually my least favorite chapter, but you gotta establish setting! I will post the next chapter really soon, either tomorrow or the next day.   
> Thank you for reading!  
> \--R&T


	2. Healing

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Philza, Technoblade, Tubbo, and Tommy have had six months since Wilbur died.   
> It hasn't been easy, but they are a family.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Mini-chapter! Wanted to post today so less time to wait until the next one goes up tomorrow.
> 
> TW: Anxiety, referenced panic attacks, referenced trauma, referenced violence

Dream was not pleased to be dragged out of bed in the middle of the night by his communicator pinging frantically. He was even less pleased when he tried to rouse George and Sapnap, and neither of his friends would accompany him. He rubbed his arm in annoyance where Sapnap had punched him sleepily. 

He sighed as he knocked on Fundy’s door. Everything seemed to be in order from out here. Whatever they needed him for better be good. 

“Come on in.” Dream was surprised to see Eret open the door. The tallest individual on the server looked shaken, urging Dream inside and shutting the door quickly behind him. 

“Do you know why Fundy has been spamming me for the last hour?” Dream questioned Eret as they walked down the hall to the living room. 

“Yes, but… It’s best if we discuss this together.” Dream shrugged and adjusted his mask. A comforting gesture for his own benefit, making sure it was tied perfectly in place. The living room was lit brightly, Fundy was curled up in his easy chair by the fire, and Wilbur sat calmly at the table, writing in his journal. 

Dream chose to stand behind a couch. “Anyone want to inform me what’s going on?” Fundy looked up at him, eyes wide.

“Dream, listen, I’ve been doing just like you said, keeping Wilbur secret and helping him with his memories and stuff, right? So, I took him out tonight, he wanted to see the town. We are just minding out own business when endermen start attacking us out of fucking nowhere!”

Dream had half a mind to turn on his heel and leave, to go back to his nice warm bed. “So, you looked at some endermen and… got attacked. What do you want from me?”

“You think I’m stupid enough to stare endermen in the eyes!?!” The fox hybrid was offended and angry, but looking into his face Dream perceived an undertone of fear. 

“Endermen don’t attack unless you harm them or look at their eyes…” Dream knew he was being patronizing, but he was tired and annoyed. He just wanted them to get to the point.

“No shit! But these ones didn’t; I’m telling you Dream there is no way either of us looked at them. One attacked from a fucking alley and once Eret killed it, another jumped down off the roof!” 

Dream was not going to let go of the idea that the fox hybrid was just an idiot that easily.

“And you’re sure it wasn’t just the same one teleporting around?”

“Fucking look okay!” Fundy held out his hand and Dream looked at the ender pearls resting within. 

“I’ve got two here, the third one didn’t drop any but there is no way it’s the same one.” 

Dream evaluated silently for a minute. There was probably a perfectly rational explanation for all this, that didn’t involve the endermen going rabid. 

“Dream.” Eret’s deep voice spoke up from where he sat on the couch. He waited until he had the masked man’s attention.

The tall figure gingerly removed their glasses, white glowing eyes blinked slowly as they adjusted to the light.

“Dream I know something is wrong.”

* * *

Philza straightened his hat on his head wearily. Tommy and Tubbo had decided their new favorite activity was to find creative ways to steal his ever present possession from him, and their newest device, a redstone contraption undeniably built by Tubbo, had worked as intended. Well, almost. In the end Tommy was stuck in the device with the hat, which gave Philza plenty of time to glare at him until he returned it.

Tubbo had spent the time laughing hysterically and making fun of Tommy’s predicament. As soon as Tommy was released, he started chasing Tubbo down and the two were now out of sight in the yard. 

Philza sighed contentedly as he walked into the kitchen. Techno stood at the counter, slicing some vegetables expertly. 

“What’s for dinner Tech?”

“Caught some rabbit earlier, thought I’d make stew.” Philza nodded appreciatively. He didn’t know when Techno had become such an accomplished chef, but he appreciated the breaks having someone else cook gave him. The few times he had insisted Tommy and Tubbo cook ended in disaster, and invariably more work for Phil since he had to clean up after them. 

“AHHH help me hide!!” Tubbo barreled through the back door and rushed into the kitchen eyes darting around trying to find a place to hide that wouldn’t trigger his claustrophobia. Phil was about to interject, when Techno huffed and shook out his cape, the long robe he wore reaching the floor. In an instant Tubbo had rushed to the warrior and pulled himself under the cape, standing closely behind him.

“Act natural Technoblade!” Tubbo hissed the words loudly. Techno continued to dice vegetables, albeit more slowly. 

Philza stifled a laugh at the sight. As clever as Tubbo may have thought the hiding spot, it still looked like Techno had a person hiding under his cape. Plus, Tubbo’s grey shoes peeked out noticeably from under the white fringe. Turning in amusement Phil seated himself at the counter. He wanted to see how this played out. 

It still brought a rush of joy to Philza every time he saw the boys laugh or play like this. It had been just over six months since Wilbur died, and a lot of that time was spent getting them to a place mentally where they could let their guard down. 

Seeing Tubbo with Technoblade almost always brought tears to the older man’s eyes. It had been a long process to get to this point. It required a lot of patience and hard work. 

At the beginning Tubbo couldn’t even be in the same room as Techno without having a panic attack. But Philza’s heart soared with pride at how hard his older son had worked and focused to alleviate some of Tubbo's fears.

Techno had a separate wing in the house he stayed in at first. Eventually Tubbo decided he wanted Techno to join them for dinners occasionally, so they set up some guidelines for that. Techno would seat himself first, at one far side of the table. Tommy and Tubbo would come in after and Tubbo would sit closest to the door, where he could escape if needed. Those first few nights Techno barely dared to move. He ate so slowly Philza thought he might be sick, but the piglin hybrid was being beyond careful not to make any sudden movements. 

Technoblade had even taken his armor off for those dinners, something that everyone knew made the warrior uncomfortable. Without it he felt vulnerable, yet he abandoned it without being asked, just on the basis that it might make him less threatening to Tubbo. There had been bad days too. Days Tubbo couldn’t handle the meal and took it up to his room. Or days that Techno left instead, feeling too jittery to sit still. But they were both patient. 

The first time Tubbo had addressed Techno in conversation was a delight, everyone froze, then the warrior answered slowly in his characteristic deep voice and sarcastic tone.

The first time Tubbo met his eyes was terrifying, but Tommy squeezed his hand and he managed only a few fast breaths. 

The first time Tubbo said he forgave him, that he never blamed Techno, directly addressing the trauma, was a surprise to everyone. Philza watched as the piglin hybrid wiped away tears. After the boys had left the table, Techno had broken down completely, and Phil was there to wrap him in blankets and comfort him. 

Then there was the day that Philza had come home and walking into the living room, met with the sight of all three boys sitting on the couch. Tubbo was seated next to Techno, close enough that their shoulders touched, and showing off something. Philza had to go to his room after that, tears of joy wetting his own face. 

There were still hard times. Nothing was mended completely, but Techno tried so hard every day to be a good big brother to both boys. Even when he moved too quick and Tubbo had a flashback, or every night that Tubbo woke up screaming, Techno never complained or stopped trying. He adjusted his behavior, and improved. 

Philza had noticed another change in his son as well. 

Since that day where Philza had joined the server Technoblade never carried a crossbow under any circumstances. 

Phil knew this put the warrior at a disadvantage in combat, but his son made that choice knowingly and willingly. 

It had been six long months.

They were all healing. 

* * *

Tommy ran around the house for a second time, fake anger filling his voice as he called Tubbo’s name. He didn’t know how the smaller boy had dupped him, but he was determined to find him. As he swung around to the back-door Tommy flung it open, taking in the scene. Techno was working on dinner, smelled good, Philza sat by the counter, giving Tommy a stern look when the door slammed shut. 

“Hey big man, you seen big T anywhere?” The comment wasn’t directed at either person specifically, but expectedly only Phil answered.

“Couldn’t tell you Tommy.” Tommy dodged around the living room, checking behind furniture for the other boy. 

“Is he in de walls?” Tommy pranced around and rapped on the walls with his fist, pausing to grin when Phil shot him a warning look. Tommy did a double take as he looked into the kitchen. 

There was Techno, standing at the counter. 

Techno, standing with his large red cape. 

Techno, with a cape that occasionally squirmed on its own and looked decidedly Tubbo-shaped. 

Tommy strolled over to Technoblade casually, stopping behind him. 

“Tubbo in a cape, what will he do?” and Tommy yanked the cape upwards, leaving Tubbo standing there with a cheeky grin as it floated back down to cover him again. Tommy tried to keep up the angry act, but it was just too funny. He collapsed to the floor in laughter as Tubbo dramatically peered at him from behind the cape. Blue eyes wide with exaggerated innocence. 

Ping

Who knows how long that nonsense would have continued if not for all four family members receiving a communicator message simultaneously. Tommy propped himself up on his elbow to open the message, snorting as Tubbo detangled himself from the cape and spun. 

**< Dream> Server meeting tomorrow at noon. Anyone who is available please attend. Meeting will be held in Eret’s castle. **

Tommy met Tubbo’s eyes with confusion. The brunette mirrored his look. As far as Tommy knew there had never been a server meeting before. Sure, different groups or countries would hold meetings, but never the entire server. What could possibly be so important that everyone attend?

Ping

All eyes turned to Philza when they realized only he had received the second message. After a moment of reading his forehead scrunched and he looked up as they gazed at him expectantly. 

“Dream wants to meet with the four of us before the big meeting tomorrow. He says there is something we need to know ahead of time and we should meet him in L’Manburg.” 

As everyone opened their mouths to discuss Philza cut them off with a raised hand.

“Yes, I asked him to elaborate and he refused. He just promised it’s safe and that it’s important.” 

Tommy looked around the room. He wasn’t sure how to feel, they knew next to nothing at this point. Tommy’s opinion of Dream had improved somewhat when the masked man banned JSchlatt from the server. But he still didn’t trust him. Tubbo looked apprehensive, but also almost excited. Something big was happening and everyone knew it. 

Techno was unreadable, after a moment he simply went back to cooking. 

“Well, if you have any objections let me know. Otherwise, be ready for a couple meetings tomorrow. We’ll be together and if we want to leave at any point we will.” Philza looked at all of them carefully. Tommy met his gaze firmly; he understood the implied message. 

They would be safe.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A little bit of happy times before we get into things!   
> Did you like getting to see how the family is doing? I'm sure Wilbur's arrival won't change anything......... right?  
> Ooooooh also first Dream POV! Short but there will be more of him in this story.
> 
> Posted early today mostly because I'm waiting for MCC haha!   
> As always, I hope you enjoyed!!  
> \--R&T


	3. Reveal

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Dream reveals what he knows.  
> No one knows how to feel about it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Some explanations are given.  
> CW: Swearing
> 
> TW: Anxiety, panic attacks, referenced manipulation, referenced abuse, referenced violence

Techno steadily lead the way towards L’Manburg. They could have ridden, but it was a nice morning and Tommy wanted to show off his new ‘prime path’ as he called it. Besides, Technoblade had horses stabled around every major settlement on the server, if they wanted a quick exit, they would have it. 

Techno cautiously peered over his shoulder at the two boys behind him. Tubbo and Tommy were chattering together, but Techno could see the smaller boy occasionally glancing around nervously. It was always a roll of the dice whether they would be comfortable there on a given day, but so far the two seemed to be doing alright. This whole 'announcement' had them all on edge. 

They crossed a path that led to some of the housing. Techno was grateful Dream had the decency to not force them to meet in the town square, even though it looked completely different now, it still wasn’t a pleasant place for any of the family. Fortunately, they were able to skirt the outskirts, and approach the house that was apparently Fundy’s. The fox hybrid was nowhere to be seen, but Techno spotted the Dream team standing on the front porch together. 

He had to remind himself to relax as he approached the three young men. Though Technoblade and Dream held a mutual respect for each other as fighters, when the Dream team got together oftentimes chaos followed in their wake. Dangerous chaos. Despite this Dream and Techno had done tournament fights with each other, and Techno enjoyed sparring with someone of similar ability. It was a rare treat. Still, the piglin hybrid was always on high alert around him. Today was no exception.

Technoblade was apathetic towards Sapnap and George, thought they were certainly capable, neither alone stood a chance against him. Techno had to struggle to shake old habits of only evaluating people based on how easily he could kill them. 

The real concern with those three stemmed from the strange ‘games’ they would engage in. Technoblade understood needing to let off some steam every now and again, but hunting your friends for sport seemed… a little much. Sure, they rarely actually went so far as to kill each other, and apparently, they had strict punishments if you did so by accident during their ‘manhunts’, but the whole concept seemed a little… odd. Techno was always down for the occasional duel, but hunting someone down felt different to him. But to each their own. If Technoblade was a little more on guard then usual around the three then that’s fine. He will protect his family.

“Hey, thanks for coming.” Dream approached the group with a wave, opening the door broadly and gesturing for them to follow Sapnap and George into the house. Techno stepped aside to let the boys and Philza enter first, he would prefer to stay between them and the biggest threat. The group entered a cozy living room, the potions and redstone littered about it were indicative of its primary occupant. 

“Alright” The masked man was unreadable as he sat on a chair facing the family. 

“So, I’ve got something to tell you all…”

* * *

Philza’s mind was filled with static and buzzing. His mouth moved without him commanding it.

“What do you mean? Wilbur is dead, I… I killed him.” Dream’s passive mask stared back at him. Philza felt himself growing angry, how could this man come in here and hurt his family like this? Making claims and—

“You’re right, it shouldn’t be possible.” Dream spoke levelly. The only indication of emotion was the way his hands fussed at the edge of his green hoodie. “But, he is alive.” 

“What the hell you dickhead! You knew he was alive and didn’t fucking tell us?” Tommy surged to his feet and lunged forward aggressively, only stopped by Tubbo’s restraining grip on his arm. Philza stiffened as Sapnap and George moved closer to Dream. The former looked jumpy. But then, Technoblade had also taken the opportunity to stand, looming protectively over Tommy and Tubbo, eyes fixed on Sapnap. The piglin hybrid was clearly daring him to make a move. The air crackled with tension.

Dream stayed sitting, resting his hands on his knees. He took a deep breath and spoke calmly, Philza appreciatively recognized the man trying to defuse the situation.

“I… I may have made a mistake in that regard. I’ll admit that. But you don’t have all the information yet.” Philza gently tapped Tommy on the shoulder, nodding at him to return to his seat. To Philza’s relief the boy complied, sitting stiffly and glaring.

“When Wilbur… came back, he didn’t come back whole. It’s like all the pieces of him are around here, but he’s having to gather them up.”

“What Dream is trying to say is that Wilbur can’t remember anything. Or, much of anything at least.” George helpfully tried to clarify upon seeing everyone’s confused faces.

“Right. So I had concerns that as he got his memories back, especially more recent ones, he would… well…”

“Dream was worried he’d go crazy again! Start trying to blow stuff up or whatever.” Sapnap’s interjection was far more animated. Philza frowned. Regardless of those concerns, it was wrong of Dream to keep this information from them.

“But now there isn’t a choice of keeping it secret. I’ll explain that at the meeting, but I thought you all deserved to know first.” Philza nodded slowly. Wil was alive, Wilbur lost his memories, but his son was alive. It was far too much to comprehend. The room was still for a long moment, everyone processing the information. Finally, Philza was the one to shatter the oppressive silence.

“Is he here? Can we… see him?” Philza was still struggling to believe it was true. Wilbur had died, in his arms, his son--

“Yeah sure, George, go get him.” George begrudgingly complied and left the room. 

Philza turned towards his kids. Techno looked… numb. There was a blank expression on his face, as if he just couldn’t understand how this could be possible. Tommy still looked angry, which was to be expected, but there was a trace of fear in the blond’s eyes. Tubbo was clinging to Tommy, his blue eyes were wide with shock as he fidgeted with the sleeves of his shirt nervously.

“Boys, if any of you don’t want to be here right now, then you can leave. No one will blame you.”

“No.” Tommy’s voice was firm. “I want to see him.”

* * *

Wilbur waited anxiously in his borrowed bedroom. He had been told the basics of what was happening, that his family was here and were being told he was alive. But Wilbur still didn’t remember them… how could he approach a family he didn’t know? He paced restlessly in the room, waiting for someone to come fetch him. Finally, a knock at the door.

“Wilbur?” George jumped back as the door was flung open in his face. “Eeeep!!!” The smaller man yelped with a high-pitched squeal, before gathering himself and rubbing his cheeks as they flushed. “Come on downstairs. They want to see you.” Wilbur followed George as he huffed down to the living room. At the last moment Wilbur hesitated, a thousand what-ifs clogged his mind. Would he know them? What were they like? Did they know how this happened to him? He was yanked into the room roughly by the arm when George’s patience ran out. 

“Uh… Hello?” Four new faces stared at him. Directly across from him sat two boys, looked like teenagers. The one on the left had brown hair and blue eyes, the one on the right was much taller and blond. Wilbur gasped as he remembered.

“Bee boy and… and… angry child!!” Wilbur shouted elatedly “I remember watching you from the house! When I wasn’t alive yet.” Wilbur looked around the room joyously, surprisingly, no one looked particularly happy at his revelation. Most just looked confused. 

“Really? You don’t remember us at all?” Bee boy spoke up, his tone edging on frustration. Wilbur was about to say no when…

_Blond hair on top of a van, celebration, L’Manburg. Uniforms and buildings, a book, cheering, a book, shouting. An arrow._

_Tommy_

Wilbur didn’t realize he had spoken the name aloud until the blond jolted. 

“I remember… I remember being part of L’Manburg with you. We were cheering and so happy and proud. I’m sorry I don’t remember more…” Tommy’s face was stony. Wilbur didn’t understand, the boy’s jaw was clenched tightly, like he was angry, his face was fierce. Wasn’t that memory a good thing?

“Well, my names Tubbo? Remember anything like that?”

_Tubbo, walls, black and yellow and towering, safety, Tubbo building, gathering materials, buildings being erected._

Wilbur swayed as the memory took hold. “I remember you Tubbo, I remember you building everything.”

Someone snorted derisively. Wilbur turned his attention away from the boys and towards the source of the sound. Standing against the far wall was the Warrior. The piglin hybrid was hard to read, but he looked to be some combination of stressed and angry. Wilbur took in the armor, the weapons, the sword—

_“Awww Tech you always win!”_

_“Not my fault you suck, have you ever considered getting good?”_

_Wilbur was the same height as Techno and though he swung his sword with precision, the wooden practice blade was countered easily by the other._

_“Phil! Techno is being mean again!”_

Wilbur didn’t realize he had stumbled backwards with the force of the memory until he felt an arm catch him. Fundy was standing awkwardly in the doorway, steadying him. 

“I remember sparring with you Technoblade, as kids, we… we’re brothers, aren’t we?” Techno jolted, eyes growing wide. 

“You’re all brothers. You, Techno, Tommy, and Tubbo now too.” The voice was calming despite its trembles. Wilbur turned towards it instinctively, wanting to find to source, to find the safety it promised. There stood dad. Green stripped hat and all, standing in front of him with teary eyes.

_“I’m scared Phil.”_

_“That’s okay son. It’s fine to be scared.”_

_Thunder shook the cave lit by firelight. Philza stepped into the entrance and fought off a zombie, returning close to the campfire once it was safe._

_“But, Wil, I promise, if you need me, I will always come to protect you.”_

Wilbur remembered Philza protecting him. He wanted nothing more than to rush into those arms right now, to confess how scared he was, how uncertain it was regaining his memories. But the urge passed. Philza didn’t open his arms and Wilbur didn’t move towards them. 

“Okay, if we don’t leave now, we will be late to the meeting. You can talk on the way.” Dream led the way out of the house. 

* * *

They did not, in fact, talk on the way. Everyone, including Tommy, were too caught up in their thoughts to maintain conversation. Even Wilbur seemed to get the message and silently followed along with the group. Tommy couldn’t help but watch him apprehensively out of the corner of his eyes. It was just so unbelievable, they were just getting used to him being gone, and now he was back. Wilbur kept getting distracted, fortunately Fundy seemed to have taken the role of babysitter and was keeping him on track. 

Tommy didn’t know how to feel. On one hand, he was happy Wilbur wasn’t permanently dead. How couldn’t he be? His brother, who everyone thought was gone forever, was here. This part of Tommy wanted nothing more than to run over and hug him tightly, to hold his brother close and make him promise to never leave them again.

On the other hand, Wilbur had fucked up. And now.... He didn’t remember anything that mattered, much less… much less how many bad things he had done. It wasn’t like Tommy would even get an apology out of him, he didn’t remember hurting him. Tommy felt Tubbo squeeze his hand as they walked, his best friend sensing his tension. How could Tommy even begin to forgive him? It just didn’t make sense.

When the group strolled through the castle gates Tommy shivered a little. He would tolerate Eret nowadays, mostly because Niki and Tubbo enjoyed spending time with him, but Tommy didn’t forget easily. Not when he had been betrayed and his family had been hurt. 

Everyone thought it was best for Wilbur and Fundy to wait outside for a bit. Tommy tensed when the group entered a large room, perhaps once a throne room, but now it had been arranged with a huge table and chairs. Tommy followed Philza closely when he saw the crowd of people already present. They were all being seated as his family approached, Tommy noticed a gap left for them. 

“Hello!” Tommy saw Tubbo smile as Badboyhalo waved from across the table, seated near the middle. The Dream team sat next to him, with Dream himself at the head of the table. Tommy sat down between Tubbo and Technoblade. Philza sat on the other side of Tubbo, and Tommy breathed a small sigh of relief. At least they wouldn’t have to push and shove to have some space. 

Surveying the room, it looked like a good portion of the server had showed up to the meeting despite the short notice. Besides his family and the Dream team Tommy noticed Bad had brought along his little group. Bad and Skeppy, along with Antfrost and Awesamdude, had formed their own little coalition. It was informal but they liked to be separate from both L’Manburg and Dream SMP. Every time Tommy heard the name he couldn’t help but snicker though. I mean, group called themselves ‘the Badlands’, that was almost as ridiculous as ‘the Dream Team’. 

Eret was there of course, it’s their castle after all. Quackity and Niki both smiled at Tommy when he caught their eyes. He was happy to see so many friends here. Tommy especially appreciated Niki's presence. If anyone besides Tubbo would understand how Tommy felt, it surely would be her. After a moment of settling in Dream called the meeting to order.

“Hello everyone, thanks for coming. We are on a time frame so I’m going to get right to the point. Wilbur is alive.” The room erupted in questions and startled gasps, pandemonium only barely contained.

“Yeah, we know it’s impossible, but it happened, so everyone shut up and listen!” Sapnap was quick to shout over the group, quieting them and waiting for Dream to continue.

“Okay, so he died without an active set of respawn runes. By all accounts the very matter that makes up… well him, should have been scattered and lost forever. But a couple weeks ago I was getting some weird readings on the server and checked it out. Somehow, he was able to hang together, incorporeally, without having a spawn. Using my abilities as admin I was able to… basically force him together again at world spawn. Is everyone following so far?” The entire room was silent, every face filled with the same look of bewilderment and confusion. Tommy scoffed. Why did the mechanics matter anyway?

“Look” George spoke up and adjusted his glasses. “That’s not really important. What matters is that though he’s alive, he isn’t whole. That manifests as lost memories. He remembers very little of anything, likely he won’t remember any of you.” The room again erupted with sound, everyone was confused. At some point Sapnap left, and the room froze when he returned with Fundy and Wilbur in tow. Tommy intentionally stared at the table, refusing, or perhaps unable, to look at his brother. 

“Hello everyone.” Wilbur gave a weak smile to the gathering, before being hastily ushered to a chair. Tommy scowled. 

“Sorry if this is callous but… this is good news, right? Why are we all here?” The voice that spoke up was Awesamdude, who looked around the table with embarrassment. The creeper hybrid shrugged helplessly, he had joined towards the end of Schlatt’s rule, he didn’t have much personal connection with Wilbur. Tommy could hardly begrudge his callousness. 

“That’s a good question, you are all here because something has gone wrong.” Tommy almost started laughing outright, just barely managing to hold his tongue. Dream was so dramatic. Dream looked as serious as ever, not that you could tell under that ridiculous mask.

“Have any of you noticed an increase in the presence of endermen recently?” When several voices muttered affirmations, Technoblade and Philza included, Dream continued. “I assume you all know the basics of servers and world generation so I’ll get right to the point—”

“Uh, big D, what if we don’t know those basics. Not that I don’t, but I thought Tommy over there looked a little lost.” Quackity spoke up jokingly, but Tommy still flipped him off. 

“Oh sure, asking for a friend Quackity? I for one know everything there is to know about servers and worlds. Speak for yourself.” Tommy snarked back instantly, appreciating the distraction.

“Language.” 

“Fuck you!” Tommy stuck out his tongue at the horned hybrid rudely. 

“Tommy….” Philza’s stern warning covered Bad’s second admonishment. 

“I think Dream is probably referring to the nature of endermen’s role in servers.” When Dream nodded Philza took that as permission to continue. “People can move between worlds or servers fairly easily. We just need to travel to a portal at spawn to do so. The only other creatures capable of that are the endermen. But they don’t need a portal, they can simply teleport between worlds at will.”

“Right” Dream took back over here. “And endermen have a specific ‘job’ for lack of a better word. They can affect the world around them and instinctively work to keep the servers stable. They… sense when something is amiss that could affect the world and move to fix it. Things like faulty world generation or enchantment magic gone wrong, they sense it and try to control the problem.” Truthfully, Tommy didn't know much about this. It's not like he had reason to, this was the first world he had ever lived on that Philza hadn't set up for him. He still pretended to be disinterested in the conversation though, reputation and all. 

“Most people don’t even realize they do this!” George had hopped back in, much to Sapnap’s chagrin. The dark-haired man rested his forehead on the table sullenly. “So because Wilbur here is considered wrong, they’ve gone all hostile towards him. It’s not like they’re smart enough to know what’s happening, they just collectively sense that something is wrong and are trying to fix it.”

“So… what are they doing exactly?” Niki spoke up, her eyes had hardly left Wilbur since he entered. Tommy thought she looked a little too happy all things considered. She almost looked relieved to see him. How could she? A sharp pit of spite was working its way into his gut. 

“They’re trying to kill him.” Eret surprised everyone when he spoke, his low voice filled the hall in a way Dream’s never could. “They are gathering from everywhere, even coming in from other servers to try to destroy him.” Tommy felt a heavy lump of guilt join the sharp spike of spite. Here he was, unhappy his brother was back from the dead, and meanwhile Wilbur was getting hunted down. 

“Why can’t he just leave?” Tommy glanced at Skeppy just in time to see the man get elbowed by Bad. Tommy felt vindicated by the sharp tone of the other man's voice. At least someone else wasn't all sunshiny about this. 

“It’s an option. Based on my knowledge two things could happen. He would either die, or he would successfully leave, but never be able to get his remaining memories back. Neither option is good.” Dream answered patiently, shrugging as he laid out the reasoning. So, Wilbur could leave, but he would never be himself again. Awesome. Or he would die which wouldn’t be—

“The issue is.” Fundy’s yippy voice spoke up from next to Wilbur. “Wilbur hasn’t been able to set a bed since he got back! Something about not being all here means he can’t activate the respawn runes. And fat fucking chance he somehow hangs on in the void a second time.” 

Tommy turned towards Philza, and then lowered his eyes. His father’s face was filled with concern, with care. He hated that it was pointed towards Wilbur after everything that had happened, and he hated himself for being upset about it. 

* * *

Tubbo was thoroughly overwhelmed by the proceedings. There was just so much noise and shouting, he kept squeezing Tommy’s hand, trying to get his friends attention, but the gesture went unnoticed. He just wanted to leave. 

Besides, Tubbo already had a pretty clear understanding of the problem, just from the little the group had been told, and he had a guess for what solution they would suggest. He figured the only way to get the endermen to lay off attacking would be to hijack their queen. The ender dragon held some sway over the collective agency of endermen, she could gather them to herself to help defend after all. Tubbo wasn’t sure how Dream intended to work it out, but he could hear about it later. Right now, he just wanted out of this room. 

Tubbo bumped Tommy more roughly with his arm, but the blond didn’t respond, far too invested in his own thoughts to notice. Tubbo shifted in his seat, he was fine, he knew he was fine, but there were people all around and it was loud and his back was pressed awfully hard to this chair and someone was shouting and several people were heavily armed—

“Hey, Tubbo, you alright?” the deep voice broke him from his thoughts, Techno was leaning forward and peering at him around Tommy. 

“Yeah… uh… it’s just” Tubbo took a couple fast breaths, he didn’t want to cause a scene, not now. He focused his eyes on the table, trying to stay calm. He yelped a little as his balance was thrown off. The chair he sat in was pulled backwards a bit, away from the table. It made a scraping sound but Tubbo was grateful to be a little further away from all the noise, and far less boxed in. He looked up appreciatively at the piglin hybrid who crouched near the side of the chair, giving him space. 

“Thanks Technoblade.” Techno grunted.

“Should I get Tommy?”

“No, it’s fine… he’s busy.” Tommy didn’t seem to have noticed that Tubbo had moved away. His hand stayed hanging in the gap where Tubbo had been holding it, but the other boy didn’t turn. 

“I just… I want to go outside for a bit.” Techno nodded and stood, getting out of the way as Tubbo slid off the chair. Tubbo moved quietly towards the exit, he could get caught up later. When he entered the hall he was startled to see Techno following behind him. 

“Oh! You’re coming?”

“Uhhhh, thought I would, but I can stay if you don’t want me to…”

“No, it’s fine.” Tubbo hesitated, was it fine? He had hardly ever been alone, much less alone with Techno since… But things were different now. Tubbo was surprised to realize he really did want Technoblade to come with him. He was even more surprised to reflect on the fact that he felt safer with him there than without. That was a big change, when did that happen?

The two walked out into the afternoon sunshine. Eret’s castle used to have some nice gardens around, so Tubbo decided to try to find them and see if they still were in good shape. Techno followed silently, from a little distance.

Tubbo took a deep calming breath as the wind blew around scattered leaves in vibrant swirls of color. 

Much better. 

* * *

“Tommy, you really didn’t know Bad was an ender dragon hybrid?”

“NO! how was I supposed to fucking know? I didn’t even think that was possible!”

“Tommy… what did you think he was then?”

“Well… I assumed he was some sort of double hybrid! Like an endermen and a cow or something, for the horns!” The room erupted in laugher as Tommy flushed and sunk into his chair heavily. Philza was happy to notice the tension in the room dissipate, whether or not Tommy appreciated the humor at his expense, Philza knew the kid could take it. The loudest laughter was from across the table, where Skeppy was practically in tears.

Philza was relieved to see him relax, the man in blue had been forcefully glaring at Wilbur since he entered. Obviously, some anger remained from Wilbur attacking him and killing Bad before. Or at the very least, some well justified caution.

Philza was beyond filled with emotion. Part of him was so relieved to see his son alive that he could barely focus, eyes tracing him again and again, reassuring himself that this wasn’t a dream. Another part was filled with concern for the situation, this was unprecedented. An undertaking this serious wasn’t something to take lightly. A third part was rolling with conflict. Whether he remembered it or not Wilbur had done some terrible things, and he wasn’t about to let that happen again. 

But he was a father, how couldn’t he be happy to see his son alive? 

“So why does that matter anyway!” Tommy had gotten over his embarrassment enough to speak up again, trying to distract from his amusing oversight. 

“It matters because Bbh might be able to stop the endermen from continuing to attack, if we kill the ender dragon.” Dream had finally stopped wheezing long enough to put back on a voice of leadership. 

“So why haven’t we been allowed to kill the dragon before? Seems like this would have been easier then.” Fundy was grumbling again, though his ears weren’t pinned with annoyance, instead pointed forwards indicating the fox hybrid was paying close attention. Philza had gotten quite good at reading hybrid body language over the years, having a piglin hybrid son with a perpetually monotone voice will do that for you. 

“Yes… well. In a server the ender dragon is the source of magic, like a wellsprings. It’s where the enchantments and portals and even respawn runes get their power. She doesn’t really control anything, but it’s necessary to have something as the… source? Or more like the container I guess.” 

“So, what about servers where the dragon has been killed?” This time it was Quackity who spoke, tucking his beanie self-consciously around his ears as he did so. 

“In those worlds the admin becomes the new power source, the one who contains that magic so it can be distributed. Like… have any of you been on Bad or Skeppy’s servers?” Several people nodded. “Those worlds aren’t where people live, but are run as places for entertainment. Like amusement parks. Have you ever noticed all the things they can do on those servers that they can’t do here? I mean things like fly, change the makeup of the world around them, even create objects out of thin air! Once the dragon has been killed the admin gains a lot of power—”

“And Dreamie poo wanted you lot to be a challenge for him!” Sapnap cut off his friend with a snarky grin.

“I didn’t want an unfair advantage. We’ve been having serious conflicts and I didn’t want undue influence as the admin.” 

The room stayed mostly quiet, several hushed murmurs could be heard. None of this was news to Philza, but he didn’t understand where this was all going. As far as he knew, server admins had a lot of power, but they couldn’t control endermen like the dragon could. Suddenly Quackity stood up and slapped his hand on the table, yelping quietly when he smacked it with more force then intended.

“As current President of L’Manburg, how can I know that you won’t use this power unduly now?”

“Well… you don’t. But there isn’t really an option. If we kill the ender dragon with Bad there, then he may be able to exert some influence over the endermen, filling the power vacuum right as it is created. It’s never been tried before, but according to my calculations it could work. And things are only going to get worse the longer we wait. The endermen are getting more and more aggressive, not to mention the increase in numbers as they migrate to this server in force.” 

“And yes, when the ender dragon is killed, I will get those increased admin powers. But my very reluctance to have them at all should reassure you that I will keep things above board.”

“This is the only chance we have at saving Wilbur.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is the last "exposition" chapter!! now the story can really start moving along and I am hyped!!  
> Yes, manhunts are a thing here, it's all good clean fun until you accidentally kill your friend, but they really try to not let that happen. Also.... lore of the world!  
> I hope you enjoyed, I am really excited to share this story.  
> \--R&T


	4. Adventure begins

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> They know what they have to do to save Wilbur.  
> It's all a lot to handle, especially for Tommy.  
> They have a plan to follow, should be simple.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Off on the quest... hope everything goes as planned  
> CW: Swearing
> 
> TW: Anxiety, referenced abuse, referenced manipulation

The family walked home quietly. They had decisions to make. 

After the meeting Tommy and Philza had explained to Techno and Tubbo what they missed. Essentially a group, preferably a large and well-armed one, needed to go to the end and kill the dragon. That wouldn’t be difficult, if not for the aggressive endermen pouring into the world. Eret had said he could sense them, sense their urge to destroy Wilbur, and by the look on their face Tommy supposed it wasn’t pleasant. 

Philza had insisted that everyone involved be given the night to think about it, to decide their involvement. Tommy appreciated that. His mind had been a blur of confusion and feelings since the big reveal earlier. 

“So, are we all supposed to leave spawns here if we are going?” Tubbo was inquisitive and hadn’t stopped pestering him and Philza since they left, Tommy was fighting off his annoyance. If Tubbo wanted to know everything then he shouldn’t have left the meeting. The blond knew he was being unreasonable, but he couldn’t help how he felt. 

“Yes, Dream said it’s too risky to set spawns along the way. Endermen are known for being destructive and besides that, we wouldn’t be able to insure we had a full 6-8 hours to activate the runes properly while traveling.” Tubbo nodded at Phil’s answer.

“Why not leave the one they are targeting here? Seems like a better strategy to split their numbers.” Technoblade spoke up, practical as always. 

“We considered that, but then our numbers would be split as well. Dream doesn’t think we have enough manpower to defend Wilbur and fight through endermen that are being gathered to defend the dragon unless we go as a group.” 

Techno hummed to himself in consideration. Tommy was tired. When Tubbo yanked on his arm to get his attention he felt a burst of frustration and annoyance.

“What do you think Tommy—”

“Oh, now we care about what I think! Woop-de-do Wilbur is back and all fresh and new with some epic quest, let’s go fucking save the princess!” Tommy stopped on the path and squeezed his eyes shut, fighting back hot tears that threatened to emerge. 

“Tommy…” Philza started softly, reaching out a hand towards his shoulder.

“Don’t touch me! Just leave me alone, all of you can do whatever you fucking want!” Tommy ripped his arm away from Tubbo and stormed into the house and up the stairs to his room. He flopped heavily onto his bed, burying his face in his pillow. He screamed into it, muffling the sound. 

Eventually Tommy rolled over and quieted. He couldn’t help but notice how big the bed felt without Tubbo sharing it, normally the boys both slept in his room, it was more comfortable for them to not be separated. Tommy knew Philza had made the beds extra-large just for that reason. Tommy didn’t want to think about it. 

A while later soft footsteps followed up the stairs and his door creaked open quietly…

“Go to your own room Tubbo.” Tommy snapped at the door without looking. 

Slowly the door creaked shut and footsteps retreated down the hall. 

Tommy curled in on himself, and for the second time that night, he cried into his pillow.

* * *

Tubbo looked out the window at the rising sun anxiously. He had slept poorly, for the first night in a long while he had been alone, and when he woke with nightmares Tommy wasn’t there to help calm him. He didn’t blame Tommy, but the stress of the previous day had put him on edge and his extra-intense nightmares reflected that. It would’ve been nice to have his friend there. 

Tubbo patted his bag where it sat on the counter. He had told Philza that he was not going on the trip if Tommy wasn’t, and that was final. But Tubbo knew his friend, he wanted to be prepared if Tommy had a change of heart overnight. So, he packed all the supplies they had been told to bring. Philza was, understandably, against Tommy and Tubbo coming. But the older man certainly knew no force could stop them if they were determined to come, might as well help instead. 

Techno was serving breakfast onto plates while Philza was gathering some extra things Dream had suggested for the journey. Philza and Techno had offered to stay if the boys wanted, but it was obvious they wanted to be there protecting Wilbur. Tubbo really hadn’t processed anything yet, he knew that might come back to bite him, but for now he was okay to go with the flow. 

Heavy footsteps plodded down the stairs and all eyes tuned towards the landing.

Tommy froze when he noticed their stares. He was wearing his favorite red and white shirt, with a pair of practical pants. He noticeably had a backpack thrown over his shoulder. 

“What? You don’t think big man Tommyinnit is going to miss out on a chance for adventure do you?” Tommy puffed with the show of confidence, but Tubbo just smiled at him encouragingly. Techno shrugged and slid Tommy a plate. 

The front door closed as Philza entered. “So, I got the horses loaded with gear, a couple extra sets of armor too and—” He saw Tommy sitting calmly at the counter.

“Good morning Tommy. I… I want you to know that if you don’t want to come, for any reason—”

“I’m coming Phil.” Tommy’s voice held a note of forced joviality. 

“Alright, but if you change your mind or—”

“Wil’s my brother. I’m coming.” This time Tommy’s words were sharper, much more similar to his cut off tone from the previous night. Philza dropped the issue. 

Tubbo scooted a little bit closer to Tommy as Philza continued laying out the plans. It would be a day of hard travel, then setting up an endermen-proof camp before darkness fell. The Dream team would be supplying all the ender eyes needed to find the portal and fuel it. Messages had been pinging constantly all morning as different people confirmed whether or not they were coming.

Quackity and Niki had decided to stay behind and hold down the fort here. It made sense, somebody had to be around to make sure those who remained stayed somewhat civil, and neither of them were the best fighters anyway. The whole Badlands group had decided to come, which made Tubbo smile every time he thought of it. He had gotten a lot closer to Skeppy and Bad since… everything. It would be nice to have them along. 

Eret was coming, his sense of endermen activity would be more then valuable. Finally, Fundy had agreed to come, somewhat begrudgingly, as handler of sorts for Wilbur. Since the fox hybrid had spent the most time with him after his return, it would be good to keep him around. Hopefully they would be enough.

Tubbo and his family hopped on their horses to meet up with everyone. Dream had sent out coordinates for a point north of L’Manburg where the group would set off from. He warned that they would be going by water as much as they could, but Techno didn’t seem concerned. The horses were well trained enough to return to their stables if sent off. Techno spent a lot of time working with them. 

Tubbo rode his spotted horse next to Tommy, occasionally giving his friend concerned glances. Tommy was much quieter than usual, and it put a certain feeling of gloom over the group. 

Tubbo hoped things would get better once they met up with the others.

* * *

Badboyhalo sighed long-sufferingly as Skeppy tried for the eighth time to get his horse to jump over a river. Expectedly, his friend only got splashed with water and increasingly upset.

“Baaaaaaaad….. How did you do this? Darryl won’t jump!” Bad rolled his eyes. Antfrost and AweSamedude were quietly chatting alongside him, ignoring the usual nonsense from atop their own horses.

“Skeppy, just jump at the last second!”

“It’s not working!”

“You’re jumping too early! Skeppy, stop jumping so soon!”

“I’m not!!!! You’re telling me to jump at the wrong time!” Bad was grateful he had told their group that they needed to be there an hour early. They had spent twenty extra minutes getting ready at the house when Skeppy grabbed the wrong sword, another fifteen arguing about whether they brought enough potions, and now had been trying to cross a tiny river for another twenty. At this rate they might still be late. Opting to ignore the blue dressed man for now, Bad turned towards Ant and AweSamdude.

“Did you guys get all the supplies I asked.”

It was AweSamdude’s turn to sigh.

“Yes Bad, both Ant and I brought plenty of heath potions and brewing stands.”

“Good!” Bad was a little bit anxious about having volunteered their group to be in charge of first aid for the trip. AweSamdude was an excellent brewer, possibly the best on the server, and Antfrost could only be rivaled by Niki in his medical skills, but it was still a big responsibility. Bad knew he was also prepared for medical emergencies, but it was nice not to be the only healer for once. 

Recently the Dream team had started dragging him along for their ‘Manhunts’. They had been getting frustrated at having to call it early due to injuries, and, for some unknown reason, decided the best solution was to pester Bad into coming with them and treating wounds on the go. It was a mystery to even him why he agreed. So not worth it. 

“Oi, troll boy, having trouble with a little bit of water?” Bad was happy to see the family approaching, even Tommy, who aggravated him to no end, was held dear to his heart. 

“Come on mate.” Philza pulled the smaller form of Skeppy onto his horse behind him, then easily rode his own through the water, leading Darryl behind. 

“You didn’t say I could just walk through!!!!” Skeppy was outraged.

“You didn’t ask!” Bad snickered to himself. They still had time; it had been so worth it. 

“You guys ready?” Antfrost had gotten more comfortable on the server recently, but Bad was still surprised to hear him speak up as the two groups converged to head towards the meeting place together. 

“Ready as we can be I suppose.”

“Yeah, I’ve only got…. Five extra sets of full netherite enchanted armor.” Technoblade shrugged as the group gasped. Even Philza looked shocked.

“When did you even….” The eldest trailed off. “You know what, I’m not even surprised anymore.”

Bad waved at the others as they entered the clearing. The Dream team was huddled together by their horses, peering at their communicators and a map. Fundy, Eret, and Wilbur were riding in circles, the latter seemed to be having trouble staying in the saddle. Fundy was fuming already. Not a great start. 

“Hey.” Dream gathered everyone’s attention with a wave. “We are going to start heading that way, should be really smooth until we hit the coast. I had Snapmap scout our path early this morning, but he could only go so far. George?” George jumped when his name was called, Bad could see his eyes widen through his red tinted glasses when he caught everyone staring expectantly at him. 

“George come on man, the eyes?” Sapnap was rubbing his own eyes with tiredness, Bad recognized the grumpy look on his face. Great.

“Oh! Oh yeah!” George fumbled around in a padded satchel that hung from his shoulders, eventually he held aloft a glowing ender eye. The pearl had been infused with blaze powder and was fragile, hence the special case. Bad figured they must have assigned the least… aggressive member of the Dream team to carry them. 

“Alright, everyone mount up!” In a rush of movement the whole group had gotten astride their horses. All eyes turned back to George as he tossed the eye delicately in the air, watching the direction it turned and floated. George managed to walk forward and catch it somewhat gracefully when it fell, preventing the first eye of their journey from shattering on the ground. 

They were ready.

Bad met Skeppy’s eyes determinably. His best friend looked apprehensive, but Bad tried to give him a calming smile.

“Let’s go!”

* * *

Fundy groaned for the umpteenth time that morning. Wilbur would just not shut up! The dude couldn’t remember how to ride a horse, so now Fundy was stuck with the other man riding behind him. At every tree or flower Wilbur would gasp dramatically before regaling Fundy with some inconsequential story from his childhood. Fundy knew this was a good thing he was getting memories back… but boy was it fucking annoying. 

Fundy tried to ignore the brunette as he prattled on about seeing a butterfly for the first time or something. At the head of the group was the Dream Team. They would occasionally pause to check a map or lob another eye, but they kept moving steadily. The terrain so far was just meadows and occasional groves of trees, nothing to write home about. Fundy rode behind them, something about keeping Wilbur towards the center of the group. Everyone else was behind, the rear was brought up by Technoblade and Skeppy. At some point Bad had broken formation to join Skeppy at the back, but no one had objected. 

Fundy thought this was all incredibly boring. Like the idea was great! Really quite the quest or whatever. But in reality, they had just been riding for five hours straight and his ass was sore, and he can’t tune out Wilbur because his damn fox ears automatically turned towards the sound. Speaking of his ears—

“Ouch! What the hell was that!?” When Fundy turned to glare at the man behind him in the saddle Wilbur looked at him with innocent brown eyes. 

“Nothing, I just wondered if they were real.”

“What the—of course they’re real!! Why would I—what?” Fundy flicked his ears in annoyance. They didn’t really hurt, but still, you don’t just pinch someone’s ears! 

“Well……” Wilbur hesitated uncharacteristically. 

“ugh just spit it out man.”

“I don’t remember how people get… those.” Fundy paused, what? He almost let his horse drift as he tried to parcel out what the hell Wilbur was talking about. 

“Wil… do you not remember the existence of hybrids?”

“No! I mean yes. I know they exist, and it feels completely normal, but I don’t know why it’s normal.” Fundy would’ve been tempted to snap harshly at him if he couldn’t hear the genuine confusion in the man’s voice. 

That didn’t mean he had the patience to explain this though. Hmmmmmmmmm who could he convince to take Wilbur for a while…..

“Hey Wilbur, I’ve got someone who can explain this to you! Trust me, he’s really nice. Antfrost!”

The cat hybrid nearly fell off his horse when his name was called, fur spiking up dramatically. Despite this, as Fundy expected, the man pulled his horse alongside gently. 

“Hey Antfrost, Wilbur-no-memory here doesn’t remember what hybrids are.”

“Okay….. why don’t you explain it to him?” Fundy cursed in his head, when did Ant grow a spine? He used to be such a pushover.

“Well, I’ve been explaining things to him all day.”

“No you haven’t.” Wilbur interjected innocently.

“Shut up Wil. And my voice is tired.” Fundy coughed exaggeratively, hoping the other man would take the bait. Antfrost looked at him through slitted eyes for a moment, before eventually seeming to decide it wasn’t worth the battle. 

“Fine. Well, what do you know?”

“Umm some people have bits of creatures stuck to them?”

“That’s… not it at all.” Fundy snickered quietly at the cat hybrid’s frustration. Finally, someone would get a taste of what he’s been dealing with for weeks now. 

“My name is Antfrost by the way.” Ant seemed to realize this would be a longer conversation than originally anticipated. “But don’t expect to remember me, I joined after you were already… well, dead I guess.”

Wilbur just nodded along, permanently unphased by the talk of his death.

“Hybrids, at the core, are people with traits of creatures. Like Fundy is a fox hybrid and I’m a cat hybrid. It happens when you jump worlds for the first couple times. So, when you join a server it puts you all together right? Magic stuff. But some people have emotional or mental traits that the world interprets as being shared with certain creatures. So, the server matches it up with some physical traits as well and, boom! Hybrids!” Fundy spared a glance at Wilbur, watching as the man’s eyes looked carefully between members of the group.

“But… Why does Fundy have ears and a tail and you’ve got all that plus fur?”

Antfrost shrugged. “It’s kinda random how many traits you will get. I’m actually one of the rarer hybrids because I have so many physical features.” Antfrost took a moment to show off the claws on his fingertips and brush his hand past his whiskers. “Others can have more or less. Eret for instance is basically just tall and their eyes glow, endermen hybrid stuff. Uhm and Sam, oh AweSamdude, he’s got patches of green skin like a creeper.” Wilbur appeared to be thinking carefully.

“Thank you, that’s all really interesting.” 

“Yep. I’m going to ride back with Sam now.” Fundy opened his mouth to protest being left alone with Wilbur again, but it was too late. 

“Hey Fundy?”

“What Wilbur?”

“Are you a fox because you’re a furry?”

“You little—”

“Language!!!”

* * *

“Boat time!” Philza thought Sapnap sounded surprisingly chipper considering how tired he had looked earlier. Philza started the labor of assembling one of the boats everyone had been responsible for bringing along with them. He glanced at Technoblade, the piglin hybrid was starting to unload supplies from the horses and get them ready to be sent back home. Once his boat was completed, Philza surveyed the group’s progress. 

Eret and Fundy appeared to have teamed up on assembling theirs, the latter was desperately clinging to the side of the taller, as if afraid to be left behind. Skeppy and Badboyhalo were, expectedly, sharing a boat. However their progress in building it was… slow. The two were arguing up a storm and somehow managing to fall in the water before the boat was even built. Tubbo and Tommy seemed to be having similar luck, though Tubbo appeared to be making progress despite Tommy’s disruptions. 

At least they were laughing again. Philza was worried about the boys, he knew this all had to be a huge shock to their systems, especially Tommy. 

Techno on the other hand had built his boat in record time, having brought his own since the warrior preferred his own company. 

“Hey… Buddy!” Philza watched in amusement as Sapnap sidled up to his son. 

“Who? I don’t see any buddy of yours here?” Technoblade stood up and looked around exaggeratively. 

“Oh, come on Techno, won’t you let an old pal ride along with you? George and Dream are being all gross and I may or may not have remembered to bring a boat.” People were starting to cast off, and Philza saw Techno look at him with a hint of desperation. He took pity. 

“Sapnap, you can ride with me...”

“Hey, uh, actually I need a ride too I think? If that’s okay.” Philza jumped, almost falling in the water himself at the sound of Wilbur’s voice. Phil looked over at Techno. A hard expression crossed his son’s face before he turned and jumped in his boat.

“Come on Sapnap.” The dark-haired man shrugged and just managed to get in the piglin hybrid's boat before Technoblade cast off. 

“Alright, you’re with me then. Hop in I’ll start rowing.” Philza waited until his eldest was safely seated before getting in the boat himself. The rest had already moved a bit away from the shore, so Philza hurried to join them, focused on the physical labor of rowing the small boat. 

It was a time later before Wilbur spoke up, voice soft. 

“The sun is nice on the water this afternoon.” Philza hummed in acknowledgement of the effort to start conversation. He really did want to talk to his son, to see if he couldn’t work towards healing, but he didn’t know where to begin. 

His eyes drifted over the boats. Tommy and Tubbo appeared to be trying to capsize Bad and Skeppy’s boat. Both pairs were laughing and shouting in equal measure. Despite the circumstances, being on the water was lifting everyone’s moods significantly. Well, except maybe for Techno. Philza chucked to himself when he saw his son singlehandedly rowing his boat. Sapnap’s motivations for wanting to ride with him suddenly crystal clear since the man had fallen asleep in the back. 

Philza took a deep breath. Time to be the adult here. 

“So, Wilbur, how much do you remember about me?” Wilbur missed a couple strokes of the paddle, Philza couldn’t see his face, but could imagine the faraway distracted look. 

“Well, it’s all in bits and pieces. Mostly I know that you’re my dad. I have little… flashes of things from growing up. You protecting me when I was small, helping me decorate my room, you giving me an instrument during some celebration. It’s all… really nice.” Wilbur’s voice sounded wistful.

“You don’t remember anything more recent?”

“Not about you. I’m sorry.”

“Don’t apologize mate, it’s not your fault you can’t remember.”

Silence stretched out again, the calming splashing of waves against the rowboat the only sound. 

Philza thought carefully about what to say next. He was thinking of all his sons, they needed time and space, so he had to make sure Wilbur would be aware of that.

“What about other more recent events?”

“No… Phil, I think… well. I have a theory. It seems like I only remember like nice things? Ummm like the memories I am getting back… they’re all good!” Wilbur stuttered over his words. His voice softened.

“But, I know bad things must have happened… Fundy sometimes let something slip, or I see looks in people’s faces, I just can’t remember it.” Philza had to make a conscious effort not to fall behind in his paddling, this was a lot to deal with. 

“Well, Wil, do you want to remember those things?”

Wilbur started and stopped several times, almost answering, then pausing to think.

“I know I will have to sometime… but… I’d rather not really. I’d just prefer not to think about it.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Poor Tommy. Doesn't know what to do with all this.  
> But they have a plan! I'm sure everything will go perfectly fine! 
> 
> right?
> 
> Also the explanation of hybrids in this universe!!!  
> Feel free to theorize about what traits different hybrids have that caused them to become hybrids in the first place, I love hearing people's ideas. (Ex: Fundy is crafty and clever, typical fox stuffs)  
> Thank you for reading! Hope you enjoyed!  
> \--R&T


	5. The best laid plans

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which nothing goes as planned.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Their quest is going so nicely!! 
> 
> TW: panic attack, flashback, anxiety, blood, injury, violence

Bad’s arms were aching by the time they pulled to shore. He knew they wasted a lot of energy playing around out there, but it had been so much fun! Besides, Dream had stopped the group with plenty of time to make camp before it got dark out. Everyone had a task to do, George had been dictating messages from Dream to the group for practically the whole ride. Bad suspected the brunette wasn’t being exactly precise towards the end, but he wasn’t going to question it. 

“Come on Skeppy!!” Bad practically dragged his friend out of the boat. “We’ve got to build a moat!”

“Mo what?”

“No! A moat!”

Despite their communication difficulties Bad and Skeppy managed to get a shallow trench dug out around the chosen campsite. The place Dream had chosen was right on the beach, so the water would protect one side and funneling it around was simple. 

Bad had to duck to enter the camp and move towards the fire, the roof that had been constructed overhead made sense practically as a defense, but his horns would scrape it if he didn’t crouch. Skeppy laughed at him. Bad met Eret’s eyes as they stood across the little clearing, setting up bedrolls and blankets. The other gave him a half grin as they also stood awkwardly in order to fit under the overhang.

“Hello!” Badboyhalo jumped back with a start when the all too familiar yellow sweater and brown hair popped up in front of him. He hit his horns hard on the roof and stumbled back a few steps, eyes desperately whipping around, seeking a particular comfort. Skeppy was suddenly in front of him, one hand pressed hard to Wilbur’s chest in a shove that sent the taller man a few steps away. Bad sat down hard on the dirt.

He needed to protect them, they were his responsibility

He had made a promise, so dizzy, everything hurts

Weak, can’t even lift his arms. He needs to protect them. Stay away!

Struggle against the weight of your limbs, can’t stop fighting, someone yelped, was he winning?

No, his chest hurt, so wet, so much blood. Can’t move, must move.

Failing, failed them

He failed, he failed, he failed

“Hey, Bad. Bad, it’s Tubbo, can you hear me?” Tubbo. He failed them. Wilbur would get to him. 

“We’re right here big man, no one is going to get us.” Tommy. Tommy too. Bad clutched one hand across the white scar near his collarbone, covering the pale line, stark against his ashy skin.

“Bad, they’re okay. I’m here. We’ve got this together. Come on Bad.” Skeppy. Skeppy was here and safe. Skeppy told him they were safe. Bad trusted Skeppy from the core of his being. He reached out his arms pleadingly and was comforted by his friend falling into them. 

His eyes slowly brought the real world back into focus. Wilbur was nowhere to be seen, Bad was sure that could be attributed to Skeppy. From where he sat on the ground Tommy and Tubbo were on his left, crouched and looking concerned. Badboyhalo felt a flush rise to his face, and he knew it was noticeable due to his skin tone. He buried his face under his red bandana. 

He had never had an… episode like this with anyone besides Skeppy around. It had been so long since that death too, Bad was feeling beyond embarrassed that everyone saw him like this. He looked at the ground, hoping he could just disappear. Philza coughed from nearby. Bad glanced over despite himself. The older blond was lightly rubbing his upper arm—

“Oh no! Did I hurt you? I—I’m so sorry I didn’t mean to!” 

“It’s okay Bad, really. You’ve got a mean right hook and I should have known better then to get all in your face. It’s just a bruise.” Bad tucked his head tighter against Skeppy’s. This wasn’t supposed to happen. 

“Come on boys, let’s go finish up making camp.” Philza’s voice was a gentle command, and Tommy and Tubbo obediently followed, leaving Bad and Skeppy alone. 

“I didn’t mean to…”

“They know Bad, it’s okay. No one blames you.”

“But I should… I should be fine by now Skeppy. Why is this still happening?!”

Bad chocked out a sob, covering his face with his hands and pulling away. 

“Bad, listen. We both know I’m not good at that wise words shit.”

“Language” the word held no bite.

“But, I know I’m right about this! You’re an ender dragon hybrid because you are nonsensically overprotective and outright obnoxious about taking care of people.” Bad snorted and was going to object, but Skeppy didn’t give him the chance.

“So, what happened with Wilbur really affected you.” Skeppy wrapped his arms around Bad again, holding him close. “Bad, no matter what happens, I’m going to be right here, okay?”

“This doesn’t seem like a good place to stay… the ground is kinda rocky and—”

“You know what I mean! We are together in this! I won’t let you go it alone, all right? If anyone needs protecting, we do it together. You and me, till the end of the…”

“Muffin.”

“What?”

“You and me till the end of the muffin.” Skeppy let out a deep sigh.

“Sure Bad. Till the end of the muffin.”

* * *

Techno took first watch that night. There were certainly a lot of aggravated endermen hanging around, several tried to get into their camp, but the defenses held. Techno watched the endermen sprint around and teleport randomly. He tensed every time one appeared on top of the roof, footsteps loud in the quiet night. 

The only other person awake was Dream. The masked man was going through his weapons and armor with practiced efficiency, cleaning and sharpening each piece to perfection. It took Techno an hour to realize the leader of Dream SMP was repeating the process over and over again. 

It was a soothing thing. As a warrior himself Technoblade recognized it. Now Techno was well aware that he didn’t have great interpersonal skills. His ability to read what people were thinking or feeling was abysmal at the best of times. You add a mask on top of that and well… let’s just say Techno had never once recognized an emotion in Dream. Until now. The steady movements screamed controlled anxiety, nervousness. Techno understood. 

The two of them took turns on every watch that night. When others awoke they sent them back to sleep with a few words. 

They would protect the group.

It wasn’t like they were going to be able to sleep anyway.

* * *

The morning had gone so smoothly, Dream was actually letting himself relax a little as they traveled. Once the light hit the endermen dispersed, gradually teleporting away to some unknown darkness. The sun didn’t hurt them per say, but they couldn’t abide it for long. The group had packed up with something approaching efficiency. Dream might have preferred more focus… but this was the group he had. 

They had been traveling through an oak forest for most of the day, despite not having their horses they were making good a pace. Occasionally they would come across a grove of birch or a field, it was pleasant. It had been a long time since Dream had traveled any distance like this without someone chasing him, it was oddly relaxing. 

Every so often there would be a patch of darkness in the trees dark enough for an enderman or two to be lurking. So far Sapnap and George had made a game out of it. They would scout ahead and try to spot them before the group got too close, then race to see who could kill them first. Despite the endermen being so aggressive, neither of them had gotten injured yet. Dream wasn’t particularly concerned; he knew his close friends were more than competent fighters. Plus, they were wearing full netherite armor. It would take more than one enderman to do damage through that. 

This left Dream navigating and leading the group. It was annoying having to call George back to use the ender eyes, but he could do it with coordinates most of the time anyway. 

Dream felt calm.

It was nice to have chattering and laughing behind him. He didn’t expect to like it as much as he did. 

“Woah!” Dream looked up as Tubbo crested the next hill ahead of him, the boys had been rushing around with an abundance of energy all morning. He cupped his hand above his mask to look. In the near distance was a deep forest, with large dark trees. The canopy covered the area like a green blanket. 

“Ohhhh George…” George was beside him startlingly fast.

“Yes?”

“Direction check.”

The smaller man huffed in mock frustration as he pulled an ender eye out of the bag and tossed it in the air. Dream’s face fell. It went straight towards the center of the thick dark oak forest. This would be annoying. 

“Hey!” Dream startled and jumped when George shouted, grabbing his axe handle reflexively. He shook his head when he saw it was just Tommy holding the ender eye up out of the smaller man’s reach, having caught it before George could, that elicited the yell. 

“Okay” Dream turned around as the rest of the group made it up the hill. “We’ve got to go through that forest. It’s going to be darker in there, so we need a plan. George, Sapnap, you two will continue to scout ahead, engage any single endermen you see, but if there are more fall back to the group. Techno, can I have you take up the rear? Wilbur will hang towards the back as well with Fundy. Philza and Skeppy, I’d like you each to take a side.” Dream was pleasantly surprised when everyone nodded. “I’ll lead the way. Stick together.” 

* * *

The group had been moving through the forest for a couple of hours now. Dream was originally tense, but by this point they had fallen into a routine. George and Sapnap would engage the few endermen in their path, occasionally a couple would charge out from the side, but the group could easily handle them in those numbers. Dream was even beginning to think he might have overestimated how difficult this whole trip would be. So far, he could have done this with just George and Sapnap. 

“Dream?” The masked man turned, always a little surprised when he had to look up to someone. Eret had moved forward to walk alongside him. Dream nodded at him to continue.

“I can sense something Dream.” Dream froze, ceasing walking and causing everyone behind him to stop as well.

“What is it Eret?”

“I…” The endermen hybrid’s deep voice faltered. “I sense a group, a gathering maybe, somewhere close nearby. I don’t think I would be aware of it if there weren’t a large amount there.” 

Dream nodded, eyes already scanning their surroundings. Okay. This was fine, move careful and plan for—

“Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!! Help me! HELP!” Dream broke into a dead sprint. George was shouting, the words abruptly cut off. He had kept scouting ahead when they stopped, he was too far away…

Dream just managed to stop before he followed George’s fate. There was a cave, hidden by some trees despite its wide mouth. When Dream peered in, the purple eyes of over fifty endermen stared back.

The world slowed. Dream wasn’t considered one of the best fighters and strategists in the worlds for nothing. It was times like these when his skills shined. His mind flew with plans and calculations, faster than the endermen could teleport. In a crisis, Dream was king. 

He saw the flash of armor in a tunnel off from the initial hole, George had been forced to retreat that direction. He recognized that around here the sun was blocked by the trees heavily enough for the aggravated endermen to have free reign. They wouldn’t want to stay in one place for long, but they could attack. He saw flashes of purple as the first couple endermen teleported out of the cave and up towards the group. He recognized their odds. He made decisions.

“Techno! Take Wilbur and run, keep going that direction until you find a place to camp, then send us the coordinates. Take Tommy, Antfrost, and anyone else with you.” Sapnap was already engaging an enderman in combat nearby.

“Philza, Bad! Help us get to George.” Dream didn’t wait to ensure his directions were followed. He tossed a full bucket of water into the cave entrance and followed it down. Using it to give him needed space to fight. 

Dream knew where he needed to get to, he had George’s location locked in his mind.

He was immediately swarmed. His armor took a beating in those first few moments of the fight. The clawed hands drew rivets across it, only offput by the enchantments. A toothy mouth chomped down on the edge of his shield, pulling it away from his body dangerously. 

A sword separated the enderman’s head from its body. Dream spared Badboyhalo a simple nod as he continued to wade forward. They weren’t making enough progress. There were just too many enemies packed into this space. He felt a bruise blossom against his side as an enderman’s blow connected harshly, another he couldn’t block in time. All he could see was dark ashy limbs and glowing purple eyes. 

“DREEAM!!! HELP ME!!!” George’s high-pitched scream tore through the cacophony of endermen shrieks and chortles. 

Dream needed to get to him. He couldn’t. 

Something lit up with an orange and red glow above him, Dream couldn’t spare a look at it, but he felt a burst of heat from somewhere in front of him. 

“George!!!!” Sapnap yelled and dropped down, following his own fire charge into the cave. He vanished from sight immediately. Dream rushed with renewed energy, trusting his armor to take the blows as he swung his axe in wide arcs, separating torsos and limbs. He was aware of Skeppy beside him and Philza behind, moving with him, propelling him forward. They were nearly there, nearly at the tunnel when…

**Georgenotfound was blown up by creeper**

Dream almost laughed reflexively, all these endermen and George somehow managed to find a creeper to kill him. He didn’t. He blinked heavily, trying to block out his guilt and grief. George would respawn. Focus Dream, focus.

He gritted his teeth under the mask and continued to charge forward. Now Sapnap was in there, he would get at least one of his friends out alive. 

* * *

Tubbo ran desperately, he clutched Tommy’s hand in his own like a lifeline. They weren’t going to get separated. The group dodged trees and jumped over obstacles like their lives, or Wilbur’s life, depended on it. Tubbo had no way of knowing if they were even moving in the right direction, but Technoblade was leading the way confidently, so he followed. 

The screeches and whirls of endermen teleporting around them in pursuit was a constant menace. Tommy held his sword up and struck out at any who got too close. In the lead Techno and Eret both were fighting through the ones that managed to get ahead of them, weapons flashing in the bursts of light that filtered through the trees. Tubbo held a shield in his other hand, the defensive wood and iron were already starting to wear down from the hits of rampaging endermen. 

Fundy was dragging Wilbur along, cursing everything and everyone as they ran. Tubbo would have thought the fox hybrid would run out of air eventually, but he had impressive breath control. Tubbo almost giggled when the older gave a particularly colorful turn of phrase. 

Tubbo was distracted enough that he bumped fully into Tommy when the other stopped abruptly. The group formed a rough defensive circle in a pool of sunlight Techno had found. A gap in the trees gave them a moment of respite. Everyone took a moment to check their communicators. Tubbo grimaced sadly.

**Georgenotfound was blown up by creeper**

“Tommy.” Technoblade sounded as steady as ever, not even out of breath from their flight. 

“Yeah?”

“Do you have that ender eye you stole from George earlier?” Tubbo stepped forward protectively as Tommy sheathed his sword and started searching through his pack. Endermen were forming a ring in the shadows, boxing them in from all sides. Everywhere Tubbo looked under the trees there were more. Occasionally one would step forward into the light briefly, making a charge before hissing and teleporting away. 

“Yeah!” Tommy held the ender eye up triumphantly. 

“Good. Here’s the plan.” Everyone waited expectantly as Techno took a breath. 

“No plan. I’ve got nothing.” The group deflated as Techno shrugged. Not his strong suit. “Just figured we should know what direction to go.”

“Wait, really? You don’t even know if we were going the right direction!?” Fundy somehow still had a voice to shout at the piglin hybrid. 

“I was a little focused on keeping everyone alive ya know. Would you prefer I took the time to navigate and let you all get torn apart?” Tubbo had to hide a smile at the sarcastic tone. For some reason it made him relax. Reassured him. 

“It’s getting late. We only have a couple hours before nightfall. We need to have a camp set up before then.” Eret spoke up in a low voice, trying to guide the conversation back to a plan.

“Well how about,” Tubbo surprised himself by speaking up. “How about we just throw the eye and run like hell? Once we’ve found a good place, we can make a camp.” Tubbo surveyed faces, the group looked uncertain, but no one seemed to have any better ideas. Techno grinned. Fighting he could do.

“I’ve got a bit of water, lets toss it in the direction we need to go so we don’t get swarmed.” Antfrost pulled a stoppered bottle from his pack.

The group watched as Tommy lobbed the eye into the air.

They were off before it hit the ground. 

* * *

Dream checked their coordinates using the communicator he had built into his mask. Perks of being an admin. They were headed towards the location Eret had indicated, but it was getting dark way too fast for his liking. He adjusted his pace as Sapnap groaned in pain. 

He was supporting his friend on one side while AweSamdude mirrored him on the other. Together they were practically carrying Sapnap. Dream’s mind kept going back to the awful moment in the cave, when he was certain he wouldn’t get to Sapnap in time, that another death message would ring out. He was fighting like a man possessed when Sam appeared in the cave mouth, dragging a bleeding Sapnap along and managing to ward off endermen with his free arm. 

Dream’s mad rush to meet him had resulted in a lot of damage to his armor, but Sapnap was alive. They had all gotten out of the cave, out of the swarm, and managed to escape. 

That was in no small part due to AweSamdude. Despite having infrequent interactions with the man preciously, Dream kept giving him looks of gratitude. Sam was an excellent brewer, and the strength potion he downed allowed him to carry Sapnap single-handedly while the others fought their way through the woods. His potions were the only reason either him or Sapnap had survived. 

It had worn off now, and Dream knew from experience that a potion that strong would leave you feeling like crap. Sam already had mentioned a headache starting, they didn’t have much time before he would also be in no condition to fight. 

Finally, they saw light in the distance, bright as twilight fell. They rolled into the camp like a stampede, everyone gathering around and closing up the defenses behind them. Dream was unwilling to pass Sapnap off, so he stayed with his friend as Antfrost laid him down on a hastily made bedroll. The cat hybrid hummed to himself as he started working, finding the injuries and treating them with practiced precision. 

Dream winced when he looked at the state his friend was in. Sapnap had a nasty cut from his ankle to his knee on one leg, looked like an enderman had clawed him open. It flowed blood despite the hastily done wrappings. Antfrost removed and replaced them easily, calm movements soothing Dream’s anxiety. 

He watched as Ant dabbed and poured healing potions into the wound, then stitched it up. Next was the bite on Sapnap’s arm. It was deeper than the cut, but each puncture wound was bleeding less and less. Antfrost gave a very cat-like hiss under his breath as he treated it. Murmuring about infection while wrapping it with regen. There were other cuts and bruises, but those were treated fairly easily. Lastly was Sapnap’s wrist. His right arm was heavily bruised and cut up, and the wrist was swollen. 

“It’s broken.” Dream looked into Ant’s blue-green eyes. “He’ll be fine but it’s going to take time to heal. I assume he’s right-handed?” Dream nodded.

“Then he won’t be doing any fighting for a while, not that he should be walking around on that leg anyway.” As Antfrost braced and splinted his arm Sapnap started to stir.

“Hey idiot, what do you think you’re doing jumping in a pit of endermen like that?” Dream spoke as soon as his friend opened his eyes. Despite his annoyed tone, he knew they were close enough for Sapnap to read the concern in the words. 

Sapnap rolled his eyes and winced. “Well, I could ask you the same question.” He paused to jerk his arm away from Antfrost when the healer did something a little too roughly for his liking. Antfrost just waited expectantly until Sapnap gave him the wrist back to finish wrapping. 

“I thought I could at least get the ender eyes, though I was hoping…” Dream jolted stiffly upright. The eyes. 

Some tactician he was. In his worry about George then Sapnap he hadn’t even thought—

“Sorry Dream, I got to them, but they had been completely destroyed when George died. The blast shattered them even in that fancy case.” 

Dream shook his head and laid a hand on Sapnap’s shoulder. Wasn’t his fault. 

But… well… shit. 

Dream dropped his face into his hands, feeling the cool smooth surface of his mask.

This was not going to plan. 

* * *

Techno looked out into the rapidly encroaching darkness cautiously. Their defenses had been untouched last night, and they were even sturdier tonight. There should be nothing to worry about. A hand touched his shoulder and Techno was holding the offending wrist at an awkward angle with his other hand on his knife hilt before it registered. He released it just as quickly, muttering an apology. 

“That bad huh?” Philza looked at him compassionately, no blame or anger for the knee-jerk reaction. Techno snorted, eyes scanning. Despite his mental focus on the outside of the camp, his gaze kept drifting back into it. His mind building an internal map and insuring he always knew where Wilbur stood within it. He would have liked to think it was because he wanted to keep Wil safe. He knew it was because he wanted to keep Wil away from him. And away from the boys. 

He hated seeing his own brother as a threat. 

Philza sat down on the edge of the covered platform beside him. “We haven’t gotten a chance to talk since… well. Since we learned all this.”

Technoblade didn’t particularly want to talk. So, he defaulted to grunting in response.

“Tech, how are you doing?” The question was far too direct. Techno kept himself from looking at his father, knowing Phil was currently looking at him in that way he couldn’t ignore. He prepared a snarky answer. 

“Oh, fine and dandy. Got some pearls today, took a jog, did some nice cardio. Good for the heart.”

“Uh huh.” Philza sounded skeptical. “Well I for one am an absolute wreck.” 

Technoblade turned and stared at his father’s face instantly. 

“What, oh that gets your attention?” Philza chuckled. “I’m… overjoyed that Wilbur is alive. He’s my son, how couldn’t I be. I’m relieved that I didn’t…”

The older man paused thoughtfully. 

“But I’m also nervous. Tommy is having a rough time with it all. And I think Tubbo and you are dealing with it in much the same way.”

“Who me? Same as little bubbly, what did Wil call him? Bee boy Tubbo?” 

“Yes.” Philza sounded serious, ignoring Techno’s jokes.

“You both are just pushing it down. Focusing on other things. Tubbo is doing everything he can to keep Tommy’s spirits up and you… well you’re just spending all your energy on protecting everyone.”

Techno didn’t dignify any of that with a response, choosing to inspect their defenses instead.

“Am I wrong?” With a heavy sigh Techno turned to his dad. They both knew he wasn’t.

“I’ve got to protect them. If I let myself… If I get drawn into all the _feelings_ then I might not be able to do that.” Philza moved forward and Techno felt himself relax as the older man adjusted his cape. 

“I know son. Just… be mindful of yourself okay?” Techno nodded. Philza took his hand for a moment and squeezed it, before returning to the campfire. 

Techno turned himself back towards the deepening darkness. 

He had a job to do.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Soooooooooooooooooo............  
> Man, that isn't ideal is it?


	6. Dark and Dawn

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The night doesn't go as smoothly as anyone would have hoped.  
> They still have the ender eye problem, and Wilbur is getting unpleasant memories.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> They've got a lot going on.
> 
> TW: Panic attacks, anxiety, flashbacks, referenced abuse, referenced manipulation, violence, injury, description of injury, blood

Tommy was awake in a moment when screams broke through his dreams. Tubbo had much the same reaction, both boys were on their feet in an instant, peering through the campsite to find the source of the disturbance. In the flickering light of the torches and campfire Tommy saw it. Fundy was on the ground, being half-held, half-dragged by AweSamdude away from the wall. Even from here Tommy could see the blood rapidly pooling around the fox hybrid, ears tight to his scalp as he wailed in pain. 

Suddenly the campsite was alive in a burst of activity. There was a hole in the wall, one of the endermen had torn a hole in it. They had reached through. Tommy was fueled by adrenaline as he fastened his armor and grabbed his weapons, a careful eye on Tubbo as he did the same. 

Techno and Dream were shouting orders into the chaos. Someone, Philza, got close enough to the hole to put boards in front of it. More breaches were opening. 

“They’ve put logs and dirt over the moat! Get ready for more holes in the walls!” It was Dream who broke through the noise, stirring the group to cohesive action. Tommy moved and pulled Tubbo along with him, grabbing wood and starting to reinforce the walls. Skeppy and Bad seemed to have had the same idea, already adding an extra layer on their side of the perimeter. 

When they exhausted the first load of wood Tommy turned to get more, only to see a sight that enraged him. 

“What the hell Wilbur! Stop just standing around and help!!” Wilbur was standing aimlessly in the middle of the camp. Watching the commotion without movement. Tommy’s chest filled with that painful angry fire and sharp spite again upon seeing him. 

“Uh, what should I do?” Tommy might have felt more anxious about having Wilbur’s attention on him if they weren’t in the middle of a warzone. 

“Get some fucking wood and help!!” This seemed to stir Wilbur into action, he finally grabbed wood and started over to the nearest wall. Tubbo dragged Tommy back to their task, they were so close to getting that last layer down…

“Skeppy!!!” Tommy’s heart sank when he heard Bad shout. An enderman had broken through right where the pair were working and tossed Skeppy bodily across the camp with one swipe. Tubbo and Tommy sometimes argued, but in a crisis they were like one mind. They both charged forward, forcing the endermen out of the gap long enough to fill it and cover the weakened area with wood.

Tommy saw Tubbo relax with relief when he saw Skeppy sitting up and talking to Bad, fully conscious, and seemingly uninjured. 

It was over an hour later when the group finally had finished reinforcing the camp. 

“Okay, everyone go back to bed. There is still a couple of hours until sunrise and you need rest. Technoblade and I will keep things under control until morning.” There was dissatisfied murmuring at Dream’s assertion. Tommy knew the attacks hadn’t even remotely slowed, but with the improvements and some splash potions the two fighters could probably handle it until morning. His eyes roamed the clearing as he tried to settle back to his bedroll. In the corner there was a second prone form next to Sapnap. Antfrost and AweSamdude were both bent over Fundy, though their movements were less frantic than earlier. Tommy hoped he would be alright. 

As he laid down, he noticed a tall figure approach the medical station. His eyes narrowed when he realized it was Wilbur, choosing to check on Fundy rather than return to bed. 

Nice of him to care.

* * *

“So, we learned some things yesterday.” Dream was standing on the edge of the group, giving morning instructions as they all ate breakfast. “We know how to be more careful today. But also, plans have changed. The first thing we need to do is find a lava pool.” No one was surprised, word had spread that they were out of ender eyes. “Antfrost and Sam had enough blaze powder with them for 6 eyes, but we need at least 12. I’d also rather not use all the blaze powder since that means we can’t make more potions.”

Skeppy wasn’t particularly close with Dream, but even he could tell the man sounded exhausted. He probably hadn’t slept at all last night. 

“The good news is that traveling to the nether should throw them off our trail a little. They will be able to find us, but we should be relatively safe for a while there. Bad news, there is no sun or water in the nether.” Skeppy sighed, their only advantages were useless, great. “We will keep moving towards the stronghold with the eyes we have, and hopefully find a lava pool on the way. Sapnap, Fundy, and AweSamdude will be staying behind. The endermen should mostly leave them alone once we’re gone and Sapnap and Fundy are in no shape to travel. Sam is going to stay behind to treat their injuries and keep them safe.” 

While Skeppy listened passively through the rest of the morning prattle, he happily munched on one of the muffins Bad had insisted on bringing. Though he had fought against the obvious waste of packing space, Skeppy appreciated the pastry now. The group started to disperse and Skeppy stood up, stifling a gasp of pain. He forced himself to take deep breaths and smile at Bad when he gave an inquisitive look. Just act natural. 

He was not good at acting natural.

“Hey Bad, I’ve gotta go ask Antfrost about… the weather in the nether. Could you pack our stuff?” Skeppy made his voice as innocent as possible. Unfortunately, this only made Bad more suspicious.

“Skeppy… you better not be tricking me into doing your packing for you AGAIN! I won’t do it!”

“Noooo Bad think about it, we need to know what clothes to wear!”

“I don’t think the nether has weather Skeppy.”

“Sure it does! Besides! It rhymes really nicely doesn’t it?”

“Hmmmm, oh it does!! The weather in the nether, nether weather, weather in the nether.” With Bad distracted by making up a little tune to fit the words Skeppy took his chance to sneak away. 

He gently trotted over to where Antfrost stood talking to Sam, Skeppy couldn’t resist holding a finger to his lips and sneaking up behind his friend. 

“Hey!” Antfrost jumped amusingly high and his tail puffed up like a bottlebrush when Skeppy succeeded at startling him. 

“What do you want?” After recovering, Ant sounded annoyed and reluctant.

“Can we talk privately for a minute?” Seeming to sense a more serious tone from the jokester, Ant waved AweSamdude away, moving around the corner out of sight from the rest of the camp.

Skeppy looked down at Sapnap and Fundy. Sapnap looked like he was regaining some color, but was absolutely covered in bandages. Fundy looked terrible. His whole side was wrapped tightly, protecting the injury where an enderman had taken a chunk out of his side. The enderman had gotten a clawed hand through the wall and just grabbed, trying to pull the fox hybrid out with him. Instead, it tore through skin and flesh, leaving a gaping wound. Skeppy had seen the injury after it happened and was beyond impressed that Sam and Ant had managed to keep him alive.

“I don’t have all day Skeppy, what is it?” Skeppy sighed reluctantly and pulled up his shirt, wincing as his did so. The blue hoodie was hard to bunch up, so it covered his view of Antfrost’s face when he gasped. 

“Yeah….” Skeppy tried to make a joke out of it. “Can you believe Tommy rammed our boat yesterday?” He yelped involuntarily when Antfrost ran a hand across the bruising.

“This is NOT from the boat ride.” Ant’s teal eyes met his seriously. “How long were you planning on hiding this?” His tone was dripping with disapproval. 

“Not long—OUCH!” Antfrost did his best to look innocent after poking the injury.

“You should stay here with the others—”

“NO! No. I’m staying with Bad.” Skeppy lowered his tone. Even he was shocked at how serious he sounded. He had to fight not to ruin it with a giggle. 

“I can’t in good conscience just keep this a secret Skeppy.”

“Fine! Then I’ll treat it myself and follow the group separately. But I’m not staying here. I am going with Bad.” Antfrost gave him a long appraising look. Skeppy stared back with resolve. He had promised. 

“Alright. Sit over here while I get a couple bandages ready.” Apparently Antfrost had made his decision. Skeppy sat and only whined a little when the cat hybrid treated his injuries.

“You’ve got like, four broken ribs you know? They may get worse if you keep pushing yourself. If you start having trouble breathing you need to tell someone right away.” Skeppy thought about quipping back at him, but decided annoying the person currently wrapping some very painful bruises might not be the best idea.

Instead he smiled cheerfully.

“Of course!”

* * *

Wilbur was lost. Not literally, he was physically with the, now diminished, group, presumably moving towards the end portal stronghold thing. But emotionally, mentally, Wilbur had no idea what was going on. Last night, the chaos, it had brought back several… unpleasant memories. It was the first time Wilbur had been unhappy to receive a flash of insight. 

There was waking up to screaming and then…

_Screaming and shouting_

_Running, running away from the shouting. Tommy was running ahead of him._

_Hot pain in his shoulder, keep running._

_Anger, fear, disbelief. Keep running._

_Tommy pulling him along, giving him something to drink from a glass bottle._

_Running._

Wilbur had been stunned. He realized he was just standing in the middle of the camp, while everyone else there fought for his life, but he could feel the pain. Remember the fear he felt. Without context the events he remembered were nothing short of terrifying. 

Then Tommy had shouted at him. It had snapped him from one unpleasant memory straight into another. 

This time it was a memory of his own voice. His own actions.

_“Have you not noticed?! Everyone who's claiming to be on our side, they're lying to us! Tubbo?! He's lying to you, man!” It was a memory; Wilbur was angry and betrayed. He was shouting at Tommy as the blond backed up towards a stone wall. “He- He would drop us at the SECOND he realizes we're not in the lead anymore!”_

_Pain on his face, Tommy had punched him._

_“No! Wil, Stop it!”_

_Tommy’s shoulders heaving, there was a wetness to his eyes like the blond was one step away from crying. Why was Wilbur so angry?_

_Why was he doing this?_

_What happened?_

Tommy had snapped him back out of it, told him to get to work. So, he did. He started patching up the wall with muscle memory he didn’t know he possessed. 

He hated how he felt, hated how the memories made him feel. He could remember feeling an overwhelming rage bubbling up… but he couldn’t remember why. He couldn’t remember if it was justified. But from the memory of Tommy’s face, he couldn’t imagine how it could be.

Wilbur felt guilty for actions he hardly remembered doing. So, he tried not to remember them. 

Especially, especially he tried not to remember the last memory that had been revealed to him that night. He had gone over to Fundy after things had settled down. For all the shit he gave the fox hybrid, Fundy had taken care of him when no one else would. Wilbur wanted to make sure he was alright. 

When he went to the medical corner and looked… there was so much blood. Blood everywhere. His chest, his side, pooled on the ground. 

_Standing somewhere._

_Philza was there. Something was wrong._

_Pain and blood. Blood covering his chest, everywhere._

_A sword. Philza held the sword._

_A feeling of relief._

Wilbur didn’t understand what this memory was, and so he kept it to himself. He caught himself giving his father wary glances as they traveled.

He really didn’t want to remember these things.

* * *

Philza felt a wave of relief when they came across the lava pool in the savanna. The delay that losing their ender eyes had created was costly, but he hopped the diversion of jumping to the nether could make up for it. That isn’t to say he didn’t have serious concerns. The nether was deadly. No one on this expedition had come prepared to travel there, much less hunt down blazes in their own fortress. There was a lot of room for mistakes and errors, and a lot of consequences if those occurred.

Not to mention the threat of lava. Dying by lava was mercifully quick, but incredibly painful. No one wanted that, and Philza would do anything in his power to prevent anyone in his group from experiencing it. 

Naturally, Dream took the lead of creating the portal, the man did it so fast that Technoblade barely had time to drop his enderchest and rummage around in it before a purple glow covered the group in its light. 

“Here.” The group circled around Techno as he held out supplies. Philza should know better than to be surprised by his son’s tendency to overprepare at this point, but when the piglin hybrid started handing out potions of fire resistance to everyone he had to chuckle. 

“How did you know we would need these?” Badboyhalo pipped up while helping make sure everyone got a potion.

“Easy. I didn’t. But I’m Technoblade and I’ve got a reputation to uphold.” The group’s spirits lightened considerably and erupted in joking and laughter as they prepared for the next phase of their journey. Well. Almost the entire group. Philza noticed Dream standing off to the side. Despite his obscured features, the younger man looked tense. Phil was going to approach him, but Techno got there first.

“Hey, Dream, I’ve only got enough gold for like four helmets, who should they go to?”

Philza moved over to join them while they discussed.

“Wilbur for sure. Maybe… a couple people who can flee with and protect him if we get overwhelmed by piglins?” Dream sounded absolutely exhausted. Philza grimaced to himself. Since he wasn’t as familiar with the admin Phil kept having to remind himself that the man was now without his two closest friends. One of whom had died. Dream was probably aching not being able to be there for either of them right now. 

“Antfrost maybe?” Philza threw out the suggestion. “He is the healer and doesn’t fight as much anyway.” 

Dream nodded, seeming to be encouraged by not having to make these decisions alone.

“Sure, let’s give the last two to Bad and Skeppy. They can defend Wilbur effectively if something happens to split us up. Plus, we need Bad.” Dream shrugged when he spoke, clearly uncomfortable with putting values on his friends’ lives. Philza instinctively moved to rest a hand on his shoulder. 

“That sounds like a good plan. Techno, hand those helmets out, I’ll get everyone ready to go through the portal together.” 

Techno lumbered off to his task and Philza took another moment to face Dream.

“Are you going to be alright?”

Philza chided himself internally, obviously that was the wrong choice. Dream stiffened and suddenly looked defensive.

“Yep. Let’s get going.” The masked man turned back to the portal, insuring all was as it should be. 

Philza sighed and started to gather the group. 

* * *

Wilbur stepped hesitantly onto the obsidian frame. His memories of the nether were indistinct, he knew it was red and dangerous, but that’s about it. He wasn’t ready for the swirling sensation that churned his gut as the purple essence enveloped him before spitting him out on the other side. 

It was hot. 

It was so incredibly hot.

The waves of heat rolled across his face and arms.

_The heat hit him_

_It was so hot and loud_

_Something shook the ground underneath him. Everyone fled, running for cover, running for the lake._

_He was shouting, they all were screaming. Their home…_

_It hurt and burned. It was so hot._

_The feeling of loss overwhelmed him. Their home was burning._

_Tommy and Tubbo, Fundy, they were there._

_The heat—_

“Wil, hey Wil come on mate… we’ve got to move.”

_Philza was there and the world was exploding._

_His father was tossed away from him in a burst of heat and light._

_Why was he happy? He was so pleased, despite the pain._

_It was loud and hot, he was happy._

_The world was gone, just a crater, just ruins_

_Why?_

_Why was he so goddamn happy about it?_

“Hey, son? Son, you’re safe.” Philza was there still, the world had exploded but Philza was still there.

“Listen, focus on my voice. We have to move, it’s not good to stay in one place here.” The explosion was over, there were just ruins. Why was he happy?

“Feel my hands? I’m right here Wil. Come on, you can do it.” He felt the worn hands, they were comforting, they held a sword. 

They were safety, they were death.

His home was destroyed, he was happy.

Did he do this?

* * *

Tommy was looking around carefully. The nether was dangerous, and he was ready for it. Tommy didn’t think of himself as poetic, that had always been… well he just wasn’t poetic. But it was kinda nice how the heat of the nether matched the angry fire in his chest. 

Both him and Tubbo carried fresh shields, a necessity. The portal had taken them to some nether wastes, not exactly the best place to be, but it could be a lot worse. Fortunately, there weren’t many mobs to deal with yet. He eyed the zombie piglins that wandered around carefully, but they were passive as ever, just bumbling along aimlessly. His eyes turned towards the purple portal as the last few members of their group stepped through. 

He watched as Eret had to duck out of the obsidian frame, Tommy did not like how tall Eret was. He preferred when people were shorter than him. Then Wilbur came through and finally Skeppy and Bad. Dream was preparing to lead the way towards a crimson forest, when a startled cry rang out from behind. Tommy turned in sync with Tubbo to face the source, only to relax a little once they realized it wasn’t imminent danger. Wilbur had collapsed heavily to his knees on the netherrack and was making small cries of distress, murmuring nonsense. 

Philza was, expectedly, the first to drop to his side. Tommy watched as his father started speaking comforting words to Wilbur, trying to get him moving. They were all anxious that a ghast or roaming group of piglins could spot them at any time. They were exposed and in the open. 

Tommy gritted his teeth as Wilbur flailed. He realized after a moment that he wasn’t feeling any sympathy for his brother. The pit of guilt started acting back up again, trying to rise to his throat. He pushed it down. So what if Wilbur was having trouble with memories of things HE caused? He was the only one who wasn’t constantly burdened by them! The rest of them had to live with those memories all the time, the least Wilbur could do was not endanger them further by throwing a fit about it. 

Tubbo was proof, his best friend was pressed tightly to his side, breathing tightly controlled. If the nether reminded Wilbur of something unpleasant, then it was his own fault for causing that unpleasantness to begin with. 

Tommy felt the anger continue to rise as Philza held Wilbur close, like he had done for Tommy and Tubbo so many times over the last six months. It made him feel sick to see. Wilbur caused this! He… he couldn’t remember, and he certainly didn’t seem like he wanted to. Why did he deserve Philza’s care and—

“He’s on his feet, let’s get moving.”

The group started off on their journey, Tommy bit back his anger. It didn’t burn out.

* * *

Tubbo did not like being in the nether one bit. If they had been told this would be part of the journey, then Tubbo never would have agreed to come. Tubbo had been so close to telling the others he would wait for them in the overworld, just guard the portal or something. But he didn’t. 

Maybe he should have, but Tommy had been so tense and… unlike himself. Tubbo knew Tommy wouldn’t stay behind. And it really seemed like Tommy needed him right now. Tubbo knew he was correct about that almost immediately. When Wilbur started to have a memory and panic attack Tommy stiffened noticeably. Tubbo tried to tug on his arm, to get his attention somewhere else, but it was no use. So Tubbo just stood next to him, trying to be a reassuring presence for his best friend. 

But nothing was easy here.

Breathe in 2… 3… 4…

Out 2… 3… 4…

It was too hot. It reminded Tubbo of things. Things he couldn’t think about or else he would be as bad as Wilbur and someone would have to crouch by his side. Seeing how Tommy had reacted to Wilbur… Tubbo didn’t want that. 

He pulled his sleeves down further, despite the heat. Last thing he wanted was to get an unwelcome glance at his own scars right now.

Breathe in 2… 3… 4…

Out 2… 3… 4…

Look around. Focus. The trees are red and blue, that’s nice. Fancy colors like fi—

Nope. Listen instead, okay. Snorts of hoglins somewhere, Techno has already fought and killed a couple but keep an eye out. A ghast cry in the distance. Crackling of fire. Fire. Hot burns it hurts it burns--

No.

In 2.. 3.. 4..

Out 2.. 3.. 4..

Keep up with the group. Don’t stumble. Keep focused on Tommy, he’s right here. There are some piglins over there, a small group, it’s fine we will fight them and keep going if they attack. Get ready with your sword. 

Snorts as they pop out around the sides of trees. Ambush.

Trapped.

In 2 3 4

Out 2 3 4

In 234

Out 234

Crossbow leveled at his head. Trapped. Fire and burning

Crossbow and burning and heat and trapped

* * *

Technoblade bit back any expression of pain as the crossbow bolt buried itself in his chest plate. It hurt, but it would ultimately be just a bruise and small cut. 

He cut down the enemy with a warrior’s precision, making sure Dream and the others had the rest handled before he turned around and lowered his guard. Tubbo was standing stock still. His sword and shield were barely gripped in his hands, dropped to his sides as his arms hung limply. His blue eyes were blown wide and unseeing. 

Techno cursed himself mentally. How could he have overlooked the obvious? He lived with this kid for six months, of course he can’t handle being in the nether. But now they’ve traveled for an hour, he also can’t go back to the portal alone. 

Techno tried to spot Tommy, but his younger sibling was towards the front, fighting every potential enemy with almost manic energy. He couldn’t shout to him in the middle of combat, that was just asking for trouble. He slowly crouched in front of Tubbo, getting down below his height, and removed his helmet. 

Every instinct he had said not to remove your armor in a dangerous situation. Even your traveling companions could turn on you in an instant. Technoblade took a deep breath and ignored the fearful voices. 

“Tubbo? Hey kid?” Crap. Tubbo started stumbling back, away from him, dangerously unsteady. His breathing was beyond panicked, he was going to pass out if this kept up. 

“Tubbo, it’s Tech, I… I don’t know what to do.” Techno didn’t move closer, grateful that Tubbo stopped retreating once he had some distance. He just spoke randomly, trying to mimic the tone that Philza or Tommy used in these instances. 

“I, uh, I’m not the best one to help you right now. But I’m the pig you’ve got.” He couldn’t help but chuckle at himself, humor was a coping mechanism, sue him. 

“It hurts… It burns.” Tubbo’s voice was a whimper, Techno felt a painful lump in his throat.

“I know. If you, if you can come over here, I’ll let you ride on my back. I’ll be your beast of burden, not like the others don’t treat me enough like a pack horse already.” Tubbo continued to gasp for air, but he hadn’t collapsed yet, that seemed like a good sign.

“We can’t go back yet. But I promise, if you keep moving forward, I won’t let you get hurt. That’s a Technoblade promise, few people get those.” Tubbo’s face was covered in rapidly drying tears, the hot air did that at least. His eyes were still wide, but there was some recognition blossoming. Techno hoped desperately that seeing him there wouldn’t send Tubbo back into full panic. He didn’t know what to do with any of this. 

“Technoblade…?”

“It’s Techno, yeah. But I’ll keep you safe. I promise, so long as we are here you won’t get hurt. You just need to come over here.” Techno grimaced internally at another time he had called Tubbo closer to him. It would never be repeated. He meant his promise. 

Slowly Tubbo sheathed his sword and managed to fasten his shield to his side. His breathing was still all wrong, but this was a start. 

“You aren’t going to hurt me?”

“No. No one will hurt you. Not while I’m around to stop it.” 

Tubbo walked forward extremely slowly, each step an obvious battle. Techno held his breath.

“Okay.” Tubbo’s eyes were glazed, but he let Techno hoist him up on his back. 

It was harder to move this way, but the smaller boy wasn’t much of a burden. 

It was nice the nether dried your tears so quickly.

Not that the warrior was crying or anything. But it was nice.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Things could be going better for them.   
> They're in the nether now though!   
> How do we feel about Skeppy being hurt? Weather in the nether, nether weather!  
> Wilbur is not having happy-fun-times. or Tommy. Or anyone.
> 
> I hope you enjoyed this chapter!   
> \--<3 R&T


	7. A Great and Terrible Fortress

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> They have to get the blaze rods.  
> Techno is focused on protecting Tubbo.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Onward!
> 
> TW: panic attacks, anxiety, violence, injury, blood

Bad was concerned. He tried to hide it! He really wanted to be a force for positivity, but things weren’t going awesome. For one, they had been traveling in the nether for over an hour now, Dream had hoped to find a fortress in half that time. All of their armor was getting scuffed up from the constant fights, if it wasn’t hoglins it was piglins, if not piglins then ghasts. But perhaps most concerning: Skeppy was acting weird.

Every time Bad started a conversation or looked at him Skeppy seemed fine… but Bad could tell it was forced. He was way less talkative than usual. Bad didn’t like that. Unfortunately, there wasn’t even time to address it, every time they had a moment something would happen. And now Bad and Skeppy had taken on a lot of the load fighting, since Technoblade was carrying Tubbo. 

Bad had offered to carry the boy instead, but Techno had literally growled at him, so Bad wasn’t willing to push it. 

At least they had finally spotted a fortress. It took a bit of building to get up to the ramparts, but that was where the blazes would be. 

“Eret, with me. Skeppy, Bad, you two take the other side. Everyone splash yourself with some fire resistance on exposed skin, we don’t have time to do it properly but it’s better than nothing. Philza and Techno, each of you take a side of the path and guard the perimeter. Everyone else fill in the gaps and be ready to take down any ghasts that show up. Wilbur, stay near Skeppy and Bad, but stay back from danger. Good?” Bad nodded and plotted his path. 

Skeppy and him were going to target groups of blazes. It would be fine, just get as many rods as possible then meet up with the group. 

“Here, let me help.” Skeppy seemed to be having a struggle to get the potion poured over himself, so Bad grabbed the bottle and helped impatiently, making sure to get a good coating on his arms and hands especially. 

The group jumped the last few steps onto the elevated platforms as one, and every person rushed to secure the area. 

* * *

Techno knew his mind wasn’t on the mission anymore, but he had higher priorities. 

Immediately upon reaching the ramparts Technoblade spotted the path he would need to secure, but he couldn’t do that with Tubbo riding on his back anymore. Techno hesitantly crouched next to a low wall and lowered the smaller boy to the ground. Tubbo reluctantly released the grip around his shoulders and dropped to the nether brick floor. When Techno turned around the smaller boy was sitting with his head between his knees, still struggling with his breathing. 

Technoblade drew his sword, he had a promise to keep.

Where was Tommy? He should be here, helping guard this section. Techno engaged a couple straggling piglins, glancing around for the blond. There, Tommy was with Dream for some reason, fighting blazes furiously. Technoblade growled under his breath, tusks bared more than normal, he was going to have words with Tommy later.

For now, he fought. Once the piglins were cleared out Techno moved back towards Tubbo and the group, eyes scanning for any threat. 

Damn, he raised his shield just in time to catch the blow as something jumped down from a tower. Its bones grinded together as it raised its sword for another strike. Technoblade parried with his own sword, grimacing as the enemy’s weapon left black oily residue on his blade. Wither skeletons were not to be toyed with. 

He danced around it, being extremely careful not to let it hit him and possibly degrade his armor, feinting blows towards its head. On one such feint Techno twisted his sword quickly, reversing into the charcoal skeletons ribs and twisting into its spine. It turned to dust.

He didn’t have time to readjust. A sound between a scream and a cry rang out from overhead, a ghast charging itself to shoot a deadly fireball. Techno leapt in front of Tubbo, providing a barrier with his body while he drew his bow. It wasn’t necessary, the piglin hybrid was too good of a shot, deflecting the fire charge into the side of the tower with his first arrow and killing the ghast with the second.

“Techno!” Someone shouted, he twisted as the sword wielding skeleton dropped down on top of him, one arm knocking his bow away, the other swinging the dark sword in a deadly arc. 

It had force of the fall behind it, Techno’s eyes widened, every muscle screaming for him to dodge. He could get out of the way, he had just enough time…

Tubbo was behind him, if he moved, the swing…

He promised.

Techno gritted his teeth together so hard he was afraid they would crack. The sword sunk heavily into the forearm he threw upwards to meet it, cutting through the armor like it was nothing, cleaving through flesh and muscle. He didn’t give it a chance to strike again, swinging out a leg and kicking it in the middle of its body. While it stumbled back Techno had a moment to draw his knife with his good arm and sink it into the creature’s skull. It crumpled to dust. Techno staggered backwards. 

God that hurts. His blood started dragging the black oil through his bloodstream immediately, causing him to fight back a cry of pain. He dropped to one knee roughly, trying to hold it together. Every nerve ending was on fire, pulses of unbearable pain throbbed through his body as the withering effect of the poison took hold. It felt like he was being torn apart from the inside, which he honestly was. The oil wasn’t static, it would randomly pulse and solidify, tearing holes in veins and muscles and—

“Drink this!” Something was being pushed to Techno’s mouth, he fell back into old habits and struck out with his knife towards the fuzzy figure, but the glass didn’t move. “Drink it now.” 

Techno tipped his head back and let the foul-tasting liquid pour down his throat before trying to push the person away again. He was in pain and vulnerable, he made a promise.

“Chill okay, let me see your arm.” He finally recognized the person, though it didn’t bring much relief. Antfrost was crouched delicately in front of him, rummaging through a knapsack for medical supplies. 

“I’m fine.” Techno tried to fight his way to his feet, but didn’t make it before another pulse of pain overwhelmed him. 

“You are not fine. Sit still and let the potion work. If you want to be well enough to protect anyone then you need to let me help you.” The teal eyes of the cat hybrid were slitted tightly, belaying his stress. Techno could see his tail twitching rapidly, impatiently. 

He grunted as another round of pain hit, slowly lowering himself to sit alongside Tubbo against the wall. The brunette still was trembling with his head held down, but he wasn’t hurt. 

Clawed hands gave up on waiting and took his arm firmly. Within moments some of the pain from the wound itself was relieved, thought the pulses from the poison remained constant. The wound was wrapped tightly, enough for the blood to stop flowing as heavily. The white bandages were soon stained, but he wasn’t going to bleed out that easily. 

“Can you move your hand?” Techno jolted at the question, staring at his left arm thoughtfully. He tensed the muscles, ignoring the wave of pain it brought. His hand barely twitched. 

Antfrost took the look of panic on his face as an answer.

“Okay. Flexor or extensor tendons are lacerated, possibly muscles too.” The cat hybrid met Techno’s eyes seriously. “This will heal eventually, but you need to get somewhere safe. If you die…”

The sentence didn’t need to be finished. They both knew what it meant.

If he died with this injury, it could become permanent. 

Losing his ability to fight, to be effective in combat, that was like losing part of himself. Techno had to calm the rising fear. 

Especially when Eret shouted.

* * *

Philza was having to work not to rush to where Techno and Tubbo sat, but he had to keep his side of the palisade clear. If he didn’t, they would all be in more trouble. Skeppy and Bad had already gotten back to the group, for some reason Bad had half dragged Skeppy back, Wilbur following behind. In his brief look Philza saw the smaller man stumbling, looking slightly singed. He didn’t have time to reflect on it. 

“We got three rods!” Bad shouted out at the group. Dream raised his voice equally so his response would be heard above the fighting. 

“We have two, we need at least one more.” Bad rushed to join Dream and Tommy, Eret having taken over defense of Techno’s side, while Skeppy leaned against the wall. 

Philza shot an arrow at another offending ghast, making sure no unexpected fireballs would hit the group. 

“Dream!” The voice was low and deep, but there was fear filling the tone. Enough urgency that even Philza turned to focus on the source. 

“They know we are here.” Eret pointed at the crimson forest. All eyes turned to follow. The forest blinked with purple pinpricks, darting around. Philza spun as the first enderman teleported onto the fortress. 

“As soon as we get the last rod we run. Everyone get your ender pearls ready as well, it’s going to be tight.” Philza had concerns, but there wasn’t enough time for a discussion. Dream spun with renewed energy, engaging several blazes at once in desperation. Antfrost was helping Techno up to his feet, both trying to coax Tubbo up along with them. 

A feeling of dread hit Philza like a wave. It crashed over him with the premonition that someone, someone here was going to die. 

Philza would do anything in his power to prevent that.

* * *

It was a mad rush to return to the nether portal. It seemed like once the endermen had located them a floodgate opened. It was a much faster trip than on the way to the fortress, since they knew where they were going and had already constructed a path to get there, but it was filled with desperation as they all ran. 

Techno pulled Tubbo along by the hand, not able to carry him but unwilling to have his brother leave his side. Oh, ‘brother’. Techno was surprised at how right it felt to call him that. He shook his head snorting, not the time for feelings. 

They were nearly there, close enough to see the purple glow in the distance, when everything started to fall apart. All that was left between them and the nether portal was a big open expanse of netherrack. 

A big open expanse of netherrack with a few groups of armed piglins in it.

A big open expanse of netherrack that was rapidly filling with endermen teleporting to the open space.

A big open expanse of netherrack that had several ghasts hovering above it. 

The group almost skidded to a halt. They couldn’t fight their way through this. There was no way. Techno again tried to move his left hand, it didn’t budge. All he got was the reward of immeasurable pain as a thousand spikes tore through his body from the inside. 

“Everyone, start pearling towards the portal, now!” Dream held a green ender pearl in his hand. They all must have had dozens by now, they had fought so many endermen over the last few days. The group hastily dug in their bags, each gripping a pearl with white knuckles. Techno pulled out two and didn’t hesitate to press one into Tubbo’s palm.

“Throw it, I’ll throw mine to the same spot, I’ll be right there with you. But you have to throw it yourself.” Technoblade bent down, hoping Tubbo was cognizant enough to understand, to feel some of the urgency. Tubbo’s blue eyes slowly raised and looked out over the expanse. He trembled, but he threw the pearl. Techno threw his to meet it immediately, hoping his aim was good enough. He briefly glimpsed a third pearl in the air on the same trajectory, but then his insides twisted, and he was elsewhere. 

Techno found himself on his hands and knees, gravelly netherrack scraping his palms. His vision blurred and tunneled in with blackness as waves of pain rippled through his body. Apparently pearling while withered was not a good idea. He forced himself to move with the steady hand that gripped his forearm. Phil was there, handing Tubbo another pearl and pulling Techno to his feet. 

“Come on sons, we can do this. Just a couple more.” Techno forced his eyes to focus, just a bit, he forced his good arm to move and toss the green eye in the air. At the last moment he hoped it was in the right direction. Too late anyway.

Technoblade was being roughly shaken by the shoulder, sounds of fighting forcing him into consciousness. His whole body hurt, so badly, waves of pain intensified every time he moved. He was laying on his side, his spotty vision recognized Philza fighting off two endermen while Tommy engaged the ghast in the sky. Tubbo was the one shaking him, the boy looked terrified, but soothed slightly when Techno shifted.

He couldn’t do this. He didn’t know if he could survive throwing another pearl. The portal was there, close enough to see through the bodies of creatures blocking it, but too far away to make a dash for. He wasn’t going to make it. He hated the whimper of pain that escaped as he pushed himself to his feet, he hated the terrified eyes that Tubbo responded to it with. He leaned heavily on the smaller boy for a moment, then knew what he had to do.

“Phil! Take Tubbo and go. I’ll close the portal behind you, it’ll stop the endermen or anything else from following immediately.” He didn’t give them time to discuss. He shoved Tubbo at Philza, forcing his father to grab the brunette. He drew his sword in one shaky hand. 

“Go.” 

Philza pearled to the portal, Tubbo and Tommy in tow. Technoblade didn’t wait to start fighting, hoping that he could get close enough to the portal before the ghast shot its next fireball. He wasn’t making much progress. Claws ripped through the armor on his leg, leaving scratches behind. Another enderman sent him to his knees, sword pressed against its clawed hand as it forced him down. A shudder of pain let the enderman land another blow. 

He wasn’t going to make it; he wasn’t even going to be able to close the portal. 

Something cracked next to him, the enderman directly overtop vanished. 

Armor and blond hair were visible. “Come on mate, let’s go.” 

Philza dragged him to his feet, together they forced their way towards the portal, taking injuries for it, but making progress. The ghast screeched and Technoblade collapsed as Philza dropped him, dashing to deflect the explosive with his sword. He shuddered in pain. He was dragged to his feet again, a shield pressed into his working hand. 

“So close, you can do it Tech.” There it was, purple and glowing and filling his vision. It swirled around him as Philza pushed him into the frame. “You first—”

The ghast screamed.

Philza dropped to a knee as an enderman swiped his leg. 

“PHIL—”

Hands were grabbing him, dragging him free of obsidian. 

There wasn’t any purple.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> oh. uh oh.  
> Also! Those are the actual names of those tendons in the forearm that effect movement in the hand! Fun fact.   
> Hope you enjoyed this chapter! A little shorter but I've been working on some other projects as well this week.  
> Don't worry though!! The next chapter will be out tomorrow :D
> 
> \--R&T


	8. Unwanted Memories

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> They are back in the overworld.  
> Most of them.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Lots of emotions in this one.  
> CW: Swearing
> 
> TW: Panic attacks, anxiety, flashbacks, grief, references to abuse, references to manipulation, injury, blood

“No. NO!!” Tommy didn’t realize he was the one screaming until his hands were hurting, bruising as he slammed them against the empty obsidian frame.

“Open it up!! Dream, light it now!” Tommy was enraged when Dream only shook his stupid masked face at him. 

He charged him. “Give me flint, I’ll do it!”

“Tommy.” The masked man’s voice was far too calm. Tommy took a swing at him, but Dream grabbed his wrist. 

“Tommy, look.” Dream forced Tommy’s arm up towards his face, he didn’t understand, he did, he didn’t want to look.

**Philza was slain by endermen**

Tommy yanked himself away. Warm arms wrapped around his waist as Tubbo held him close. 

“Philza…” Tommy glared at the ground, mentally begging no one to look at him, no one should see him crying. Hot tears felt like they burned his cheeks as they fell. 

He kneeled heavily. Tubbo followed him to the ground, gently rubbing his back in small circles. Tommy tried to calm himself. He heard someone crying. This time, it wasn’t him.

Tommy raised his eyes discreetly, trying to see who it was. His chest burned with fire.

“How dare you!!! What gives you any right to cry for him? Huh? You don’t even remember half of anything—”

“Tommy…” Tommy was aware he now stood aggressively in front of Wilbur, that he was pointing a finger at his older brother’s chest. Tubbo was lightly pulling on his arm, trying to calm him down. Tommy yanked himself away from the smaller boy. 

“I… I just… he’s my dad too, right?” Tommy saw red. Wilbur sounded so calm and sad and reasonable.

“You don’t even remember him!!! You don’t remember anything that matters! You don’t deserve to feel bad about ANYTHING that has happened. You caused this all in your STUPID fucking election and—”

“Well I do feel bad Tommy!! I remember enough about him that... I remember him killing me and dying in his arms, and I still don’t want him hurt! Isn’t that enough? What will be enough for you Tommy?!”

Tommy felt the world grey out around him. Wilbur was shouting at him… He was angry.

He would hurt them. Tubbo, where was Tubbo?

Wilbur was going to hurt him, hurt Tubbo.

He needed to stop him, he needed to calm him, that was his job.

Right hand man, keep Tubbo safe

Don’t let Wilbur get angry

Don’t let him get angry

Tommy could hear a string of pleading leave his own mouth. It was his voice, but it sounded so far away. 

“I’m sorry Wil please, don’t, don’t do anything I’m sorry. It’s my fault I… Please don’t do it Wil.”

Tommy saw Wilbur’s face change from anger to shock, then confusion. That was good, less anger.

Not angry is safe. Tommy hunched his shoulders, got as small as possible. 

“What are you talking about?” Wilbur was asking him questions, find a good answer, don’t make him angry, he might—he will hurt everyone. 

“Just don’t do it Wil, please. Just…” Tommy couldn’t keep talking, his breathing was too fast and unsteady. He realized distantly his hand was shaking. He backed up and shielded his face, bumping into someone along the way. 

Suddenly there was a person, no, two people blocking Wilbur from sight. One was tall with horns, one was shorter but stepped forward aggressively. Tommy turned and ran.

* * *

Wilbur stared as Tommy fled, running towards a nearby grove of trees, Tubbo close behind. 

His brown eyes were wide… what just happened? Bad moved to block his brothers from view.

“We’ve got enough going on right now, stay away from them!” The ender dragon hybrid sounded the most seriously angry Wilbur had yet heard. He seemed angry a lot, but usually there was a joking undertone. There was no such tone now. 

“What… what did I do?” 

“You mean right now? You caused Tommy to have a panic attack because of something you don’t remember!!” Skeppy took another step towards him, the look on his face was pure fury, Wilbur could tell the man was one wrong move away from punching him. 

Wilbur stared down at his hands. What did he do to those two? What did he do to his brothers? One minute they were arguing, it was serious but… Tommy just shut down. It was like he wasn’t even there anymore.

He was in a different time.

Stuck in a memory Wilbur didn’t share. 

“I… I didn’t mean to, I didn’t know…”

“Well, maybe you should have known! Or at least cared enough to ask someone about it!”

“I didn’t want to… I didn’t want to spark bad memories.” Wilbur choked with guilt. How could he have been so stupid. 

“No shit, well _they_ don’t have that option. Consider it.” Skeppy stormed off, occasionally stumbling in his step. Bad turned and returned to where Technoblade lay unconscious, warily keeping an eye on him. The ender dragon hybrid didn’t even mutter ‘language’. 

Wilbur stared at the dirt.

He fucked up.

* * *

Skeppy moved away from the group, anger fading a bit as he walked. He hastily ducked behind a tree before breaking into a coughing fit. Skeppy doubled over in pain, tears springing to his eyes. 

He wiped his mouth, trying to take deep breaths. Antfrost had been right, he was really hurting now. Back in the nether fortress he had been moving slower because of the pain in his chest, and it almost cost him. He was lucky Techno had come prepared, the fireball he didn’t manage to dodge or block would have scorched his side if he hadn’t been soaked in fire resistance. Still, the impact from the blaze’s projectile had been damaging enough. 

Then he had to pearl across a field...

Skeppy lifted his shirt to peer carefully at his injuries. The bandages were mostly still intact, but the bruising had spread. The purple and red peeked out from the edges of the wrapping, tinged with yellow in places. Just moving and breathing hurt. Lifting his arms was agony. 

He set his jaw, trying to fight the tears that threatened. He wasn’t going to leave Bad. Bad needed him. If he told Bad then he would for sure make him stay behind, same with Antfrost. He would just have to pretend he was fine. 

Skeppy started to step out around the side of the tree, headed back towards the group, when another coughing fit stopped him. He held his sleeve to his mouth to stifle the noise, hoping he didn’t just give himself away immediately. Eventually the coughing subsided and Skeppy was able to sniff away the tears of pain and stand upright again.

He reached down to straighten his sleeves when he noticed a wet spot. 

Red stained the bright blue where he had been covering his mouth. 

That wasn’t good.

Skeppy rolled his sleeves up to hide the bloodstain. 

He was staying with Bad.

* * *

“Tommy, Tommy wait for me.” Tubbo called after his friend, trying to get him to hear him. 

Eventually Tommy slowed, stopping in a small clearing. By the time Tubbo reached him, Tommy dropped to his knees, huge sobs racking his body. Tubbo dropped down next to him and wrapped his arms around Tommy, holding him close and rocking slightly. 

“We’re safe Tommy. It’s gonna be okay.” Tommy huffed through his tears, not even bothering to wipe his face. So Tubbo did it for him, using Tommy’s bandana to dry his eyes. Tommy turned towards him and buried his head in Tubbo’s shoulder. Tubbo held him and lightly carded through his hair with one hand, waiting patiently. 

“Shit.” Tommy leaned away from Tubbo a bit and wiped his own face, breathing steadier. 

“You could say that again.”

“Shit!” Tubbo couldn’t help but giggle when Tommy took it literally, and Tommy managed a thin-lipped smile in response. Then the blond’s face hardened again, every feature downcast.

“I can’t forgive him Tubbo. At least not… he doesn’t even remember! And who knows, once he does remember he might just… He might be the same.” Tubbo hummed quietly as Tommy spoke, running his fingers over his friend’s bruised knuckles gently.

“That’s okay Tommy. You don’t need to forgive him. I don’t think everyone anyone expects you to—”

“What about Philza!? Don’t you think he’s forgiven him? Didn’t you see him back there? All chummy and happy and…” Tommy paused his tirade when he saw Tubbo’s lip trembling. The smaller boy gathered himself in the silence. 

“I think Philza would tell you that no one can force you or expect you to do anything. It’s you he hurt Tommy, not Philza, not anybody. You get to decide for you.” Tommy pulled a hand free from Tubbo’s grip and ran it through his own hair. 

“But Philza’s not here Tubbo.” Tommy paused when Tubbo stiffened. He knew that was a little unkind.

“Yeah. But he’s at home. Niki will take care of him until we get back. Besides… we can go back anytime we want Tommy.” When Tommy looked down, Tubbo was meeting his eyes, blue orbs filled with tears.

Tommy considered it. He really did. He was angry at Wilbur, furious at everyone for just accepting him back into the fold so quickly. He was terrified that Wilbur would return to his old ways any moment. But, how could he? Could he live with himself if Wilbur died after he left?

“No. I can’t. Wilbur, he’s still my brother Tubbo. I’ve got to help.”

“Tommy… I don’t think we have to do—”

“Yes, we do!! We can’t just leave now. Not when it’s so close.” Tommy surged to his feet. His decision was made. They would be staying with the group. But Wilbur better stay the hell away from him. Tommy didn’t notice how Tubbo trudged behind him as he led to way towards the broken nether portal.

It may have been unkind, but Tommy didn’t have to worry.

He knew Tubbo would stay with him.

* * *

Dream was typically the epitome of pragmatism. He wasn’t particularly proud of it, but he certainly didn’t see it as a flaw. It was just how he worked, how he functioned.

Of course Dream was aware that there were people on the server who though less of him because of it. But he was sure they just didn’t understand. Dream was never intentionally cruel, he didn’t want to hurt others if it could be avoided. He took no joy from anyone’s suffering, ever. He just did what he had to do. Above all else was the best interests of his him and his friends. Everything else was just means to that end. 

Dream wished he were as emotionless as some thought him to be. It would be easier if he were. 

As the group straggled through the woods, desperate to find a place for camp before sundown, Dream tried keep his emotions controlled. He needed to focus on keeping them all safe. Anger rose red to his face when he let his mind drift, he would think of George, respawning in pain back home. Guilt darkened his countenance in equal measure. His gut churned with nauseating uncertainly. Could they do this? 

Dream was grateful for the comforting presence of his mask hiding his twisting emotions. It had been a while since he had removed it. Typically, he wouldn’t wear it with George and Sapnap, the three of them were thick as thieves. But lately… well… Dream didn’t like others being able to read his emotions. George and Sapnap were normally the exceptions. But with how poorly Dream had been feeling, he didn’t want them to butt in.

Dream glanced sideways, checking in on the travelers. Tubbo and Antfrost were helping support Technoblade; fortunately, the wither’s poison had worn off a while ago. That didn’t mean he wasn’t seriously injured, but he could move and walk. Tommy was next to his brothers, ready to fight any endermen who got close. Noticeably, they stayed distant from Wilbur. Wilbur stuck right behind Dream, seeming to be avoiding everyone. Dream also saw that Skeppy was struggling, but what could he do? At this point they really needed everyone, able-bodied or not. 

He needed to find them a place to camp. They had been in a savannah, no water to be found. They needed somewhere they could secure for the night. Dream had to lead them. Dream wished George and Sapnap were here. 

It wasn’t until the aftermath, when L’Manburg was destroyed and Wilbur was dead that Dream started thinking he might have messed up. Once the first war was… well. He didn’t think of it as a loss for him. But when it was over he had basically withdrawn completely. He tossed most of his duties onto Eret then ran off with George and Sapnap. 

It seemed like a fine thing to do at the time. They had just fought a war about whether or not Dream had authority over everyone on the server, and it was decided he didn’t! So why should he feel guilty about not stepping in? They didn’t want his interference, his authority, so…

He was still the admin. That meant something. Dream knew it did, he knew he had responsibilities for everyone who lived on the world. Just because he couldn’t control them didn’t mean he should have abandoned them. He should have at least noticed how poorly things were going.

He shouldn’t have given Wilbur that TNT. 

So, Dream had done something very out of character, he did something that wouldn’t benefit him or his friends at all. He pushed aside the logical solution, the practicalities, and started finding ways to fix a problem he didn’t cause. Dream called the meeting, lead this quest, from emotions.

Dream hated acting out of emotions. Once again, his friends had gotten hurt when he did. George had died. 

Dream’s guilt led him to embark on this journey. He hated that he enjoyed it at times. Being with other people… he could be friends with them. Maybe. He shook his head, trying to clear the too bright emotions off his face behind the mask. 

He had a responsibility.

* * *

Everyone was exhausted. Bad could see it in every face, every iota of body language screamed worn out and tired. Somehow Bad had avoided getting more than a few bumps and bruises throughout the whole trip thus far, so he willingly took on a lot of the work preparing their camp. They had found a location just in time. It wasn’t ideal, but it was better than nothing.

Dream had somehow located a river, the banks were steep, but it gave them at least one side of the camp that was secure. Badboyhalo rather enjoyed the rushing sound of the current, it was relaxing. When he tried to bring that up with Skeppy, his friend only moodily complained that if they fell in they would drown. Bad was very concerned about Skeppy, but it was just so busy! And every time Bad tried to ask Skeppy what was wrong he would ignore the question or distract him.

Bad knew he was very easy to distract. And Skeppy was very good at being distracting. 

They had gotten the moat and walls completed just before darkness fell. The roof had been done first, along with making a fire. Antfrost was beyond busy treating everyone’s injuries. Bad scanned the camp, looking for the rest of the wood they had gathered. Based on last night he wanted to reinforce the walls early. There it was!

“Oh! Tubbo?” Bad was grabbing a handful of planks when he noticed a small form curled up next to the logs. Tubbo sat in a ball, brown hair disheveled. 

“Hey Bad.” The boy spoke slowly without raising his head. Bad set the wood back down. The walls could wait. 

“Can I sit with you?” 

“Uh, sure.” Bad took the hesitant agreement at face value and sat next to him, leaning back against the wood pile. He sat silently, just listening to Tubbo’s breathing, trying to evaluate the situation. Tubbo’s breaths were calm and slow, Bad nodded to himself, it was probably okay to talk to him then.

Bad opened his mouth to speak, then giggled audibly instead.

“What?”

“Sorry… I was going to ask ‘What’s wrong’ but then…” Bad gestured helplessly at the ragged camp with one hand. Tubbo snorted. “It’s all a mess isn’t it?”

Tubbo nodded and went silent. Finally, Bad heard the boy mummer under his breath.

“I’m just so tired, you know?”

“Yeah… How are you holding up? Can I do anything to help?” 

“No, I… I should be with Tommy, helping. I just—I just—” Tubbo hiccupped a small sob. “I just needed a break.” Bad saw tears impacting the ground in front of Tubbo’s downturned face. 

“It’s okay to not be okay Tubbo.”

“No, I’m, I’m fine.” Tubbo’s quiet crying told a different story than his words. “I’m fine, because Tommy needs me to be. I… I need to be there for him. Don’t tell him I’ve been crying… please?”

Bad sighed while looking at Tubbo’s tear filled blue eyes. The boy looked at him plaintively. Bad was going to refuse, but he was swept with understanding. If it had been him and Skeppy, he would try to be strong for his friend. Besides, hopefully this would all be over tomorrow, Dream said they were close. 

“Alright. I won’t tell anyone, but let me know if you need anything.” Bad was surprised when Tubbo scooted closer and rested his head on his shoulder. 

“Thanks.” Bad leaned down to make his shoulder more comfortable. Smiling as Tubbo settled into his warmth. 

It would all be over soon.

Hopefully.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Wilbur finally realizes some stuff huh?  
> I would love to hear how some of you are feeling/what you are thinking about this chapter. It's an... emotional one.
> 
> Reminder that I write from the biased point of view of the characters, they aren't always right, or dealing with things in a healthy way. Just like people <3  
> I hope you enjoyed! Things are escalating.  
> \--R&T


	9. Pulled by the Current

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Phil is gone, Techno is struggling to deal with it.   
> Furthermore, it's night again, the endermen are active.  
> Wilbur wants to talk.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sometimes healing starts with a conversation. 
> 
> TW: Reference to abuse, reference to manipulation, anxiety, injury, blood, violence

Technoblade finally managed to pull himself away from Antfrost’s anxious ministrations. It wasn’t that he didn’t appreciate his wounds being treated, he understood the importance, but he really didn’t want to be interacting with anyone right now. Especially not near-strangers. 

He found himself a quiet spot near the edge of the campsite and sat heavily on a log. Every muscle in his body was tense. 

Techno caught himself flicking his head around to face any sound, alert with the anxiety racing in his veins. When Badboyhalo walked gingerly through the campground with a sleeping Tubbo bundled against his chest Techno glared at him, instincts screaming for him to charge over and grab his brother away from the other man. He forced himself to stay seated, fists clenched on his knees. 

He knew Bad. Bad cared about Tubbo. Bad isn’t a threat. 

Techno mentally repeated the mantra until Tubbo was safety laid next to Tommy near the fire. He kept watching until the tall hybrid was safely away from his passel. His family.

Technoblade turned his attention to the exterior of the makeshift fort. There were several spots like the one Techno peered through, small gaps just large enough to keep an eye on the outside. The evening was active beyond any reckoning. 

The darkness shifted around the camp, bodies of endermen blending into the night as they moved around. It was dizzying. There were constant screams and chortles as endermen charged at the camp, deterred by the water surrounding it when it burned their skin. Techno knew their current safety meant nothing. The endermen could move things around, they had proved they could get to the walls. It was only a matter of time.

When Techno heard footsteps approaching, he grimaced. What part of wanting to be left alone weren’t the others understanding? 

He didn’t look up as Wilbur sat next to him on the log.

“Hello Technoblade.” Techno didn’t bother to respond. He heard Wilbur tapping his foot in a jerky rhythm. 

“Um… I’m sorry about Phil.” Wilbur sounded extremely hesitant, no wonder after the dressing down the rest had given him earlier. Even half-conscious after being tossed unceremoniously through the nether portal, Techno had heard bits of the conversation. Still, Wilbur was bringing up the one thing Techno was desperately trying _not_ to think about. 

Techno glanced at his communicator, not truly expecting a response. Philza had only died hours ago, depending on how he died, he could still be unconscious. 

**< Technoblade> Hey Phil, I thought you might want to know that I’m staying with them. I’ll make sure they all make it out of this alright. **

**< Technoblade> Wilbur included. **

**< Technoblade> So don’t worry. **

Techno didn’t want Philza to be stressed when he woke up. He knew that Phil wouldn’t respond if he thought the distraction could be dangerous anyway, so it was possible he had already seen the messages. 

Technoblade somehow stiffened more than he already was when Wilbur bumped his shoulder gently.

“I don’t want to be a bother Techno, but if you’re not going to sleep anyway… could we talk a little?” Techno sighed deeply. He hated that Phil had died saving him. He was annoyed that the guilt made him feel obligated to talk to his brother. He snorted to himself, here he is doing what Philza would want, old man couldn’t have planned this better if he was trying. 

“Yeah, okay. I’m not sleeping, what do you want to talk about?” Techno finally looked at his brother, Wilbur’s brown hair was mussed and matted, his face was… torn? Some emotion Techno was having trouble understanding was rending his expression.

“I… I did bad things, didn’t I?” Wilbur’s dark eyes reflected flickering torchlight, pleading for the answer he wanted to hear.

Techno wasn’t going to lie to him. 

“Yep.”

“Oh.” Techno sighed at Wilbur’s defeated voice. Then again, so had he. Honestly, Techno wasn’t really angry at Wilbur per se. As someone who would occasionally lose control himself, he empathized with his brother’s issues. Still, that didn’t make the things either of them had done excusable. 

Nonetheless… Technoblade had been pleased from the moment he realized his brother was alive. Losing Wilbur had been so incredibly painful for the whole family. Despite his attempts to hide it… Techno was no exception. 

It was for this reason that Technoblade had also been afraid, fearful of getting close to Wilbur again. He didn’t want to view his brother as a threat, he didn’t know if he really could. He didn’t know if he could do what it would take to stop Wilbur if he became _that_ way again. That was the fear the drove Techno to distance himself from Wilbur. Emotional connection intentionally strained thin as possible so he would be capable of protecting the rest of his family if it came down to it. 

“Will you… tell me about it?” Techno sternly evaluated his older brother. Wilbur stared back at him, shoulders shaking, but meeting his gaze steadily. 

“Are you sure?” Technoblade hesitated, if he was in Wilbur’s place… he might not want to know what he had done. But Wilbur only nodded.

“Yes. I realize… I need to know.”

It was a slow start, but Techno eventually started relating some of the events that had happened less than a year prior. At each phrase Techno kept himself watching Wilbur, just in case. 

Wilbur was horrified, that much was obvious even to Techno. Eventually the brunette broke into tears, quietly muffling them in the sleeve of his sweater. 

Technoblade’s resolute determination to distance himself emotionally softened despite his best efforts. 

He rested a hand on Wilbur’s knee as they talked long into the night. 

* * *

The night was getting active faster than anyone would have liked. Eret felt the presence of uncountable endermen stirring around them, teleporting up from caves and shadows. It was an odd sensation they struggled to explain. They had tried to tell Fundy about it during the boat ride. It was like a pulling feeling in their innermost self, some primal awareness that there was stirring. Eret had never felt this before Wilbur came back. He guessed that whatever the endermen normally did was not significant enough to affect him directly. 

Eret sighed and gave up trying to sleep. They might as well join the couple people keeping watch. His glowing eyes surveyed the camp. Tommy and Tubbo were curled up, sleeping or pretending to sleep near the coals of the campfire. Wilbur was awake, sitting and scribbling in his journal by torchlight. Likewise, Technoblade was sitting on the edge of a log, watching through an intentional peephole in the perimeter. Despite Antfrost’s assertions otherwise, the warrior had insisted he was well enough to go with the group the rest of the way. No one was willing to argue with him. 

Dream was still for once, it was impossible to tell if he was sleeping under the mask or simply resting, but he sat on the dirt, leaning against his pack. His hood had fallen back from his forehead, revealing the dirty blond hair underneath. Despite how peaceful the ruler of Dream SMP looked now, Eret couldn’t help but remember a time the clay-colored hair was red with blood. 

Eret was pleasantly surprised by how calm things had been this evening. Compared to the previous night, things were downright relaxed. When they strolled quietly past Badboyhalo and Skeppy curled together for warmth, Eret hoped it would stay that way. 

His hopeful thoughts were cut short. The feeling of pulling grew, a tug felt sharp on the endermen hybrid’s very soul. Something was changing…

Eret spun, the noises were the same, only occasional banging on the reinforced walls. Why was the feeling so much stronger?

**CRASH**

Something fell through the ceiling. 

“Wake up!!!” Eret heard their own voice echo through the camp. Tall dark forms twisted through the gap, using the leverage of standing in the hole to rip more and more of the safety covering down. 

Pandemonium.

Screaming, yelling, everyone was running frantically. Eret drew his weapon and started attacking the invading endermen with all the strength he had. He downed one, then another, no progress was being made. They kept coming, teleporting onto the roof and dropping in. They were getting overwhelmed.

“Get to the river!” The voice somehow cut through the noise, Eret hoped the others had heard Dream’s shout.

“Go! Now!” 

There was splashing in the night.

* * *

Tommy yelped as his body hit the freezing water. He desperately kicked his feet, pushing to the surface to get a gasp of air. Tommy shook his head to clear his eyes, frantic to find the others.

“Tubbo?!” Tommy was relieved when his feet found purchase, a rock in the river large enough to brace himself on while keeping his head above water. He was also terrified that he couldn’t see Tubbo. There was a white mask nearby, Dream also having found a hold in the rushing water. There was Technoblade and Eret, the taller was helping Techno stay in place. The water threatened to sweep them away at any moment. 

Skeppy and Antfrost were clinging to Bad as a lifeline off to his left, letting the taller hybrid keep them steady. But no Tubbo to be seen.

“TUBBO!!” Tommy felt his pulse rushing, panic overtaking him. He didn’t see a mop of brown hair in the water. Tubbo was short, he could be anywhere, he could be drowning right now and Tommy—

“Tommy! Over here!” The hoarse shout wasn’t Tubbo’s voice, but Tommy twisted to find the source anyway. He peered through the shadows on the water, there! Wilbur was weakly waving at him, gesturing. Tucked against his chest was…

Tommy pushed himself off his rock and let himself get swept downstream, controlling his direction enough to almost collide with Wilbur in force. His eldest brother grabbed his arm, steadying him while he caught his footing. 

“Tubbo?” Tubbo looked up at him slowly, his whole body shaking. He coughed roughly, a wet cough that made Tommy tear up to hear. 

“I’m okay Tommy.” Once Tommy was sure he could keep standing he took Tubbo’s arm, helping Wilbur support the smaller boy in the water. 

“I think I hit the water funny, I got stuck all up against a rock and—” Tubbo coughed again, raising his chin to keep above the water. “But Wilbur got me out.” 

Tommy slowly started to calm down now that he knew Tubbo was safe. He gently bumped his chin on the brunette’s head.

“Don’t scare me like that big man.” Tubbo managed to chuckle.

“I wasn’t trying to drown!” 

Rather than trying to come up with a snarky response, Tommy started evaluating their situation. The river was deep and fairly wide, where they stood in the center they were far out of reach from any endermen. It was a good thing. Tommy felt his chest tighten as he swept his eyes across the banks of the river, every meter was packed with screeching, furious, endermen. The river was only lit by the purple glow of their eyes. 

He mentally evaluated his gear, he still had his sword on his belt, but had ditched most of his armor in the camp before jumping in the river. They were stuck and defenseless out here. 

And cold.

Tommy realized his teeth were chattering painfully. The water had briefly felt warmer during his panic to find Tubbo, but now it was freezing. The chill seemed to be seeping into his bones, draining his energy every moment they stayed there. 

“Hey, Tommy?” Tommy clenched his grip on Tubbo involuntarily when Wilbur spoke.

“What do you want?” He was too tired to hide the hostility in his voice. 

“I… since we are stuck here until someone comes up with a plan, I thought… I was hoping we could talk.”

Tommy was almost grateful for the warmth that roared in his chest as he got angry again. 

“Or we fucking don’t. What is there to talk about? You don’t remember jack shit about anything important.” Tommy hated that his voice sounded weak due to the cold. He was angry, if he had the energy he would be shouting. What gave Wilbur any right to want to talk now?

“I know. I… realize now that I’ve been wrong about things. I’ve been scared Tommy. I’ve been afraid to remember the bad things.”

Tommy twisted so he didn’t have to look at Wilbur. Sure, _he_ had been scared. It’s not like he—

“But Tommy, I want to remember them now. Because… because I know now that I have done really bad things. I hurt you, both of you, didn’t I?” Tommy felt angry tears flood his eyes. Yes. Wilbur hurt them and he didn’t remember, and everyone was just acting like they had lost their memories about it too. It wasn’t fair!

“Yeah. You did.” Tubbo was the one to break Tommy out of his thoughts. Because Tubbo was too short to reach the rock, he was having to rely on both of them to help keep his head above water. Tommy heard the quiver in his best friend’s voice.

“I realized earlier today, by avoiding those memories I’m just hurting both of you more… and I don’t want that! I really don’t.” Tommy wanted to leave, wanted to avoid this whole conversation. He loved Wil. He hated him. He was angry and guilty and…

“I believe you Wil. But that doesn’t fucking fix anything!” Tommy didn’t have a free hand to wipe the tears away when they ran down his face, he just had to let them drip into the water. 

“I know. I don’t expect it to. I only want to not hurt you anymore.” Tommy finally looked into Wilbur’s brown eyes. His eldest brother gazed back, tear filled expression matching Tommy’s own. Tommy snorted a snotty laugh through his nose, all the crying was making his nose run.

“Oi some family we are. Crying in the middle of the river like arseholes while we are literally surrounded by monsters that want to kill us. What shit.” When Wilbur and Tubbo laughed Tommy felt something shift inside of him. The sharp pit of anger was still there, but the edges were dulled. 

For the first time since Wilbur came back Tommy slightly believed what everyone had been telling him.

Everything was going to be okay.

Well, unless Wilbur fucking dies again.

* * *

Wilbur knew one thing in this world with absolute certainty.

He loved his brothers. 

Wilbur also knew they couldn’t stay in this river all night. His soft eyes noted how badly the three of them were already shaking. Tubbo especially was lapsing in and out of consciousness, the smaller boy was more susceptible to hypothermia. They couldn’t just wait until morning. That wasn’t an option. 

“Tommy?” Wilbur didn’t intend to address his brother with any more questions, but his words just slipped out. 

“Yeah?”

“Do you think… once I remember everything… I, I don’t want to be that way again. Tommy, it might be better if—”

_Anger and betrayal._

_Nothing matters, the world is against you. No one matters, they’ve all left you._

_Traitors don’t deserve mercy._

_Fear. You’re losing your power. Fear._

_You don’t have control anymore, it’s all slipping away, do what it takes to stay in power._

_Stay in control_

_Control_

Wilbur hated those memories. Hated that he could remember feeling that way, hated that the memories made sense while he was caught up in them. He didn’t realize he was weeping quietly until Tubbo tightened his grip on his arm. 

“Wilbur, I don’t think that will happen.”

Tubbo’s blue eyes were half lidded and he was struggling to hold his head up, but somehow his voice was certain. 

“You might remember all those things, and how bad-- how bad you were. But, you’ll also remember this right? All the stuff that’s happened since. So, you won’t be the same.”

Wilbur smiled despite himself. Oh Tubbo, never underestimate him. Wilbur gently readjusted his grip, leaning Tubbo against his chest to make it easier for the younger boy to breathe.

“Yeah Tubbo. I will remember all of this.” 

* * *

Tubbo felt his extremities starting to go numb in the water. At some point the cold stopped hurting so bad, he just started feeling tired. He had even stopped shivering so much. He wished he could sleep but every time he almost did, Tommy or Wilbur would shake him awake, force him to talk. It was annoying. 

Tubbo wished they would just let him sleep. 

It was dark out. The screams of endermen had started seeming less threatening. Wilbur and Tommy were talking, and Tommy seemed more like himself. It was nice. 

“Tubbo! Tell me about that thing you built, the trapper with redstone, you know?”

Tubbo shook his head. Tommy sounded so far away now, maybe he was underwater? Tubbo giggled a little. If he was underwater, he couldn’t breathe! How could he be talking then? Tubbo continued to giggle for a while, it was funny.

He couldn’t remember why.

“Ow!” Tubbo felt a burst of pain in his cheek, he worked his eyes open, the lids felt so heavy. 

“Sorry Tubbo, you’ve got to stay awake, please.” Tommy seemed sad again. Tubbo didn’t like it when Tommy was sad. He tried to talk, to make sure Tommy knew it was alright.

“S’okay Tommy. It’s nice n’ warm n’ stuff ‘kay?” 

“Keep talking to us Tubbo, you can do it.” Wilbur sounded nice, he sounded like a long time ago. Tubbo liked Wilbur from then. Why was his body so heavy?

“Wil, I don’t know if I can keep my grip. I can’t feel my feet anymore.” Tommy sounded scared now. Tubbo tried to squeeze his arm to reassure him, but he couldn’t get the muscles to move right. Huh. 

“Tommy, I’ve got you, scoot closer okay, I won’t let you go.” Tubbo felt Tommy squish closer as the group readjusted. Now Wilbur had his arm wrapped around all of them, Tubbo pretended it was a hug. 

It wasn’t so cold anymore. 

Maybe now they would let him sleep.

* * *

Dream didn’t have a plan. He should have, plans were his thing! But he didn’t. He felt his face swirl with emotions, this was a crisis, where was his high IQ moment? 

He clung to the rock. Think Dream, think. 

They were surrounded by hundreds of endermen. The stronghold was still an hour or more away. They were in a river, cold. At least he had the presence of mind to make sure he had the ender eyes before he jumped. Dream surveyed the rapidly weakening group. He almost wheezed when he spotted Antfrost, dude looked like a very angry, very wet cat. He shook his head, how tired was he if he found that funny?

Think.

They couldn’t move.

They couldn’t stay here.

Think.

* * *

Wilbur wasn’t going to let his brothers get hurt. Tommy and Tubbo were both so weak now, and in truth Wilbur was barely keeping steady on the rock himself. Despite his efforts Tubbo had fallen into a semiconscious state, it took all his strength to hold onto both boys and keep Tubbo’s head above water. No one had suggested a plan. Wilbur didn’t think there was one. 

He wouldn’t let them get hurt.

“Tommy, can you hold Tubbo up? Take him for me, just a minute.” Tommy was shaking violently, but the blond nodded his head and gripped Tubbo tightly. 

“Listen, I love you. I’m so sorry.” Wilbur pushed off the rock and angled himself towards shore.

Wilbur ignored Tommy’s pleas and protests.

Wilbur was not going to let his family get hurt again.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Update as promised!   
> Some good conversations? Too bad the circumstances are so... dire. 
> 
> I hope you enjoyed this chapter and your holidays however you celebrate (or if you don't). <333  
> Thank you for reading.  
> \--R&T


	10. A Mad Rush

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> They can't stay in the river all night.  
> They need to take action.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It was nice that the brothers talked to each other last chapter, but Wilbur wants to keep them safe, whatever it takes.
> 
> TW: Violence, blood, anxiety, referenced abuse, referenced manipulation

“No you don’t.” Technoblade grabbed Wilbur's arm tightly and dragged him back towards the middle of the river with a jerking motion. His brother sputtered when his head got briefly dragged under water, but managed to cough it clear once Techno had found some footing for them. 

“What are you doing?”

“Not letting you die, again.”

Techno ignored the pleading look in Wilbur’s eyes. They were going to do this together.

“But Techno, they--” Wilbur pointed at Tommy and Tubbo “They can’t last much longer out here. You have to let me go.” 

Techno snorted heavily, brushing his useless hand past his tusks haughtily.

“Wilbur, as much as I prefer this sacrificial hero shtick to the deranged maniac thing you had going before, I’m still not going to let you die. Not yet at least, annoy me some more and we’ll see.” Wilbur did not look amused. Techno couldn’t care less. 

“Look,” Technoblade spoke to cut off Wilbur’s protest before it could start. “We’ve got Dream over there, now, he may not know it yet, but he is going to come up with a plan. He may wait until the last possible second to do it, but any minute now he’s going to start spitting out directions. We just need to be ready to follow them.”

Wilbur looked skeptical.

Technoblade hoped he looked more confident than he felt.

Dream better have a plan.

* * *

Plan, plan, plan. 

“Dream?” Eret was talking, couldn’t he tell Dream was thinking, he needed to get them out of there. 

“Dream, how fast can the endermen track changes in Wilbur’s location?” Dream spun towards the enderman hybrid, mask slipping a little before he tightened it automatically. His face flashed when he realized. He didn’t wait to explain, this needed to be fast. 

“Antfrost, Eret, do you still have pearls on you?” Dream registered both positive responses in the background, his mind was flying. Dream twisted in the water and dropped beside Bad, just managing not to knock the others off their rock.

“Antfrost, you and Eret will need to be our distraction. I need you to pearl as far as you can in one throw, get to the nearest trees and start making a commotion. Light them on fire, throw any weird potions you have around, anything to get attention. As soon as an enderman gets close you have to attack it, do any damage you can. Then run like hell.” Dream didn’t explain what this would accomplish, he didn’t need to. They may not have known him that well, but they were aware of the urgency. 

Dream absently hoped he wasn’t sending two more people to their deaths. 

“Everyone else, as soon as they pearl away, duck underwater. Try to stay together but swim with the current downstream. I’ll get to the front and stop us when we can get out.” Bad and Skeppy nodded, Dream again let the current take him back towards the last four members of the group. 

He winced under the mask when he saw how poorly they were doing. Tubbo was all but unconscious and Tommy looked like he was barely standing. 

Dream shouted the plan loud enough for all four to hear, before stopping beside Tommy and standing on the rock next to him. He reached out a hand for Tubbo.

“Let me take him.”

“No!” Tommy’s response was immediate. Despite the fact that the blond seemed barely able to support his own weight, much less Tubbo’s, he was unwilling to let his friend go with Dream. He jerked away as much as he could without losing his fragile balance. 

“Tommy. You need to let me have him or you both will drown.” Tommy considered him with shaking jaw. 

“How do I know you won’t just drop him! You’ll let him go!” Dream grimaced. Tommy’s fears weren’t unfounded. But he wasn’t going to do that, not this time. 

Pragmatism be dammed.

“I won’t Tommy. I promise, I will keep him with me, even if I drown with him. I swear.” For a long moment Dream thought Tommy was going to refuse again. If he tried to force it, they both would drown anyway trying to struggle away from him. There was nothing he could do. 

Or maybe there was. 

Dream slowly reached up to his face. He wanted to keep everyone safe. Just this once, he would let his emotions rule. He slipped the mask off, so it hung around his neck. 

“Tommy, I’m not lying to you. I will take care of Tubbo to the best of my ability. I will get him to shore. I promise.” Tommy gasped upon seeing his face, then his blue eyes softened. Something like hope appeared in the glint of light. 

“Alright.” Tommy waited for Dream to reaffix his mask before handing off Tubbo.

Dream sighed, that was going to be a conversation later, wasn’t it?

He paused to make sure he had Tubbo tightly before he raised his hand and gave the signal.

He dropped the hand to cover Tubbo’s nose and mouth before diving under the water’s surface.

He wasn’t going to let him go.

* * *

Technoblade heard coughing as everyone dragged themselves, and each other, up onto shore. There was a moment of rest, everyone was too exhausted to move at first. Even Techno just laid on his back on the rocky sandbar, one hand still gripped around Wilbur’s. Everything hurt. 

The distant, but not distant enough, screams of endermen pulled Techno back to alertness. He sat up heavily, they still couldn’t stay here. His eyes roamed the sandbar, taking mental count. 

There were Bad and Skeppy, digging through their packs and trying to get geared up. 

Tommy had collapsed half out of the water, but he was safe on shore. 

There was Dream, starting to light a torch. 

Techno blinked faster, panic making his heart beat heavily. Where was Tubbo? Last he had seen, Tubbo was with Tommy. He pushed himself to his feet, ignoring the choking feeling in his chest when he coughed. 

“Technoblade, come here.” Techno heard Dream call him softly, he was going to give a sharp retort and head for the water to search, when he saw a discrepancy. Tucked against Dream’s side was a smaller form, barely visible in the flickering light. Technoblade rushed to him and dropped to a knee, gently manipulating the brunette’s head, fingers lightly feeling for a pulse. 

He was breathing, he was alive. 

“He’s going to be okay. Hypothermia got him pretty bad, but there’s no frostbite and he didn’t inhale much water. I’ll give him a golden apple, but I need you to get Tommy and the others, we only will have a couple minutes to take stock before we have to keep moving.” Techno had always reluctantly admired Dream’s ability to plan and strategize in a crisis, but clearly even the admin was running on fumes at his point. 

Technoblade started with Tommy, gently pulling him out of the water and nudging him into alertness. His brother shook water from his blond hair, briefly leaning on Techno for support. Techno appreciated the casual closeness, however short lived. 

“Come on, go see Tubbo, he’s with Dream.” Tommy nodded mutely and stumbled over to the others. Wilbur had managed to migrate over as well. Bad and Skeppy obliged when Techno prodded them to get moving, in short order the group was gathered. 

“We need figure out what supplies we have.” Dream started immediately; urgency evident in his voice. “I’ve got my armor and a spare chest piece, a few golden apples, and basic gear.”

Technoblade was willing to put forth his own supplies, a bit embarrassed he hadn’t managed to grab more from the camp. He had gotten so caught up in fighting the endermen he hadn’t been prepared to flee when Dream had shouted. 

“I’ve got some golden apples as well. My armor and a spare diamond set, and one strength potion. Weapons as well, obviously.” Everyone nodded. 

“I’ve got strength potions too! Antfrost brewed some last night for Techno, since he was injured but still was coming. He took one with him, but I have the other two. They aren’t the best though, they only were able to brew for a few hours.” Badboyhalo held up the bottles expressively, displaying the ruddy color for the group. 

Wilbur shrugged helplessly as eyes turned towards him. “I’ve got my own armor and weapons, and some food, but that’s basically it.”

Tommy and Tubbo were both conscious now, and it was clear neither had managed to grab much gear. Tubbo’s voice shook when he spoke. Techno was just glad they were okay. 

“I had a whole bag of stuff but… I lost it in the river. I’m sorry.” Tommy was quick to pull the other boy close and murmur encouragements.

“We both have our swords and shields.” Tommy finished the recap. 

“Okay.” Techno recognized Dream trying to come up with a plan of action, the man was rubbing his mask in small soothing circles. 

“We head for the stronghold, now. We can’t give the endermen time to catch up again, and we won’t have time to prepare a camp. We will likely have to fight our way there. Everyone take a golden apple, should give us enough energy to keep moving for now. We use one of Antfrost’s strength potions now too, everyone takes a sip. We save the rest.” Dream hefted himself to his feet and started distributing gear. “We make sure everyone has some armor, Techno, grab a couple bottles of water if you can.”

“Let’s get moving.”

* * *

It was a mad rush the likes of which Badboyhalo had never experienced before. Everyone was cold and tired, most of them looked like they were barely standing. The strength potion and golden apples had fought off the hypothermia enough to get everyone moving, but they were starting to slow down again. 

Oh, and the endermen had started to catch up. Bad didn’t like the way Skeppy’s breath rasped in his chest, his best friend was obviously in a lot of pain for some reason, but stopping was a death sentence now. The endermen were focused, attacking anything that moved in their vicinity. In Wilbur’s vicinity. 

Their frantic flight for the stronghold kept being interrupted by having to fight off endermen that teleported around them. Every minute they had to stop to fight was a minute of lost energy, of lost time. Dream had stopped wasting breath trying to reassure everyone they were close. What was the point? If they weren’t, if Dream couldn’t find the fortress, they would be dead. Bad’s mind rang with fearful echos of doubt. 

Would they make it? Could they make it? He needed to protect them, he didn’t want to fail…

Bad blocked a clawed hand with his shield, swiping his sword through the torso of the enderman and forcing it to teleport away. 

They couldn’t fail now, not when they were so close. 

* * *

Everything hurt. Every muscle and fiber of Techno’s body was aching as he cleared rubble away from the stone entrance. All he needed was a gap big enough for them to get into the stronghold, he grimaced as he heard endermen teleporting around him. He didn’t turn to look, he trusted to group to watch his back while he made them a path. He had to.

“There!” Technoblade shoved the last stone down the rough stairs with both arms, trying to push the pain in his injured arm out of his mind. Instantly the group was moving with him, heading out of the open, into the tighter hallways of the stronghold. He let them move past him, dropping to the rear of the group and cutting down two endermen that followed them in. 

Techno almost smirked to himself, even with only one good hand he was still a force to be reckoned with.

“I found it! Over here!” The tunnels were poorly lit, and there were endermen everywhere. Tommy and Tubbo were fending off three by themselves when Bad spotted the portal room. Techno was trying to block the main hall, but the endermen continued to teleport in with overwhelming numbers. There was no way…

“Get to the doorway, we need to hold them off.” Techno spotted Dream in a flash of green from the corner of his eyes. The admin was moving like a man possessed, practically spinning across the hall as he cut down enemies. When Techno backed up next to him, he could see the other’s shoulders heaving with exertion. 

Clicking rung out from within the room, Bad and Wilbur were carefully placing the ender eyes in their spots, hurriedly trying to activate the portal. Skeppy was standing on the steps, unsteadily fending off a couple endermen that had teleported in after Dream and Techno started covering the doorway. Tommy and Tubbo were beside him, each heavily trying to use the height to their advantage. 

“Dream?”

“Ye—yeah” Dream panted roughly as an endermen got past his guard, forcing him to catch a blow on the edge of his axe. 

“Can the endermen jump through that portal once it’s opened?”

Dream didn’t stop moving, a flurry of constant motion as the two fought side by side. Eventually he seemed to come to a conclusion. His words were first for Techno alone.

“Yeah. I… are you willing to stay here with me?” The tone was simple and straightforward. Dream was going to stay either way, he just wanted to give Techno the option. Technoblade didn’t even need to consider it. 

The piglin hybrid took a moment to unhook his bow and toss it and the quiver of arrows at Tubbo. He also had to sheath his sword for a moment, he hooked his shield on the edge of his injured arm, wrapping the leather straps securely to keep it in place. If he couldn’t close his hand to hold it, he would improvise. 

He turned towards the group by the portal, keeping a wary eye on Dream as the number of endermen increased, but knowing he had to speak up.

“We are going to guard the portal. Once it’s open, just go, we will keep the area behind you clear for as long as we can.” Tommy’s mouth opened in a protest that was drowned out the by a deep thrum as the portal activated. 

“Go!” Technoblade watched as his family leapt into the star-filled frame, and vanished. Wilbur was last, turning to give Techno a grateful look before he stepped forwards. 

Techno huffed to himself. Good, time to focus on fighting. 

He grabbed a cool bottle from his pocket, drinking about half before charging back into the fray. He tossed it to Dream and covered him, looking away respectfully when the other man lifted his mask to drink the rest. 

Even with the added strength, the numbers were rapidly getting overwhelming. He and Dream settled back-to-back, moving with an ease Techno had rarely experienced when fighting cooperatively with anyone. But they couldn’t last forever.

His shield was already starting to crack. He heard Dream grunt behind him, having taken another injury.

A deep resolve settled in the warrior’s chest.

He hoped his family would be okay.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well, protective Technoblade did a good protect. Shame these brothers are so self-sacrificial all the time though. 
> 
> ALSO!!! Someone made fanart from last chapter and it is amazing!!! I love it so much and they gave me permission to link it here! They are leva-prava on tumblr: https://leva-prava.tumblr.com/  
> <3333 Send them some love if you want, it's incredible that someone would make fan art for this story... and it's such an emotional bit of art too, they captured the emotions soooo well.
> 
> Thank you all for reading! <3  
> \--R&T


	11. To Slay a Dragon

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> They've reached the end.   
> There are only five members of their group that have made it this far. Will they be enough?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The beginning of the end?
> 
> TW: violence, blood, anxiety, injury

The moment of getting tossed to the end, to a different dimension, was disorienting. For a moment Tommy felt like he had flipped head over heels, that gravity had reversed and he was standing on the ceiling. 

There wasn’t time to settle in. A roar forced Tommy into action. He briefly surveyed the surroundings, they were on an obsidian platform, suspended a few meters above the endstone island. Nearby was the ring of pillars, each with the vibrant crystals on top they needed to destroy. Oh. And there was the dragon. 

The ender dragon soared overhead, twisting in the sky as if searching for the intruders that dared invade her sanctum. 

Tommy felt a wave of fear pass over him when he looked at the island. The usually pale-yellowish endstone was almost obscured by the groups of aggravated endermen. They looked like a mold growing on the landscape, teleporting and sprinting aground, mouths open to bare sharp teeth. There was a part of Tommy that was ready to give up at the sight. There was just no way. There were five of them, five tired, injured people against all of this. 

He half turned, almost ready to just hold his family close and wait for the end, when he saw the faces looking back at him. 

Tubbo looked terrified, and exhausted. But even while his blue eyes were wide, his jaw was tightened resolutely. His best friend and brother was nocking an arrow on the bow Techno had thrown him, aiming for the nearest tower. Wilbur stood behind him, seemingly frozen with shock. His brown eyes were gentle and sad, his hair looked like an absolute mess. He was there. He was alive.

Bad and Skeppy stood with shoulders touching, Skeppy also had a bow and was choosing his target from the platform. The shorter man swayed unsteadily, Bad looked beyond concerned. 

Wilbur started speaking, voice hollow. 

“Listen, you all, it’s too much. If you let them just—”

“No!” Tommy’s voice erupted as he lunged towards Wilbur, not letting him move past. “We are here! Come on Wil, grab your sword. We are NOT letting you die now!” Wilbur was his brother. Wilbur wanted to make things right. If Wilbur died, they would never have the chance. Tommy would protect him. 

Two explosions rang out, almost in sync as Tubbo’s and Skeppy’s arrows found their marks. Instantly their location was known. All purple eyes turned towards them, and the first couple endermen teleported onto the platform.

“Get down, jump off it!” Tommy grabbed Tubbo’s arm and yanked him away from the closest enderman. Skeppy and Bad were already at the edge, the fall wasn’t enough to injure, but it wouldn’t feel good. They needed to get down before the endermen grouped up underneath. Tommy dropped off the edge, letting himself roll when he hit the stone and lunging to his feet. The group circled, Tubbo and Skeppy stayed in the protected center, loosing arrows at the crystals whenever they had a chance. A couple more exploded, Tommy felt a brief moment of hope.

A roar shattered any forming confidence. 

The dragon swooped down towards them, dark wings sending bursts of air as it dove. The group was forced to scatter. 

Tommy followed Tubbo as he ran towards a tower, putting his back to it while he tried not to get grabbed by the surrounding endermen. Wilbur? A distinctive yell rang out from behind. 

Wilbur had gotten clipped by the dragon’s wing, the force knocking him to the ground several meters away. All that was visible to Tommy was a prone form, and the enderman pushing down on the shield that covered it with an unrelenting foot. Tommy didn’t hesitate, he charged over, striking down the enderman pinning his brother to the ground. His arm flared in pain when another enderman teleported to his side and ripped it open with a sharp movement. 

He bit back a cry of pain, focused on making sure Wilbur made it to his feet. There were so many enemies. 

* * *

“Skeppy!! Where are you?!” Bad shoved back a group of endermen with his shield, trying to catch another glimpse of his friend. He was desperate to find Skeppy, the ender dragon had separated them with its charge and now—

“Here! I’m here!” Bad ignored the bruises and scrapes he obtained by charging towards the voice. Skeppy was standing alone, sweeping his sword in wide arcs to keep the endermen at a distance. It was a short-term solution. Bad joined him, shoving the last remaining strength potion in Skeppy’s hand and forcing him to take it. 

“What?” 

“Drink it Skeppy, we need to get the rest of the crystals.” 

“You take it!” Bad knew this was not the time to be arguing, but when did they ever do things the easy way. 

“I’ll drink half if you drink first!” Skeppy grumbled, but blocked with his shield while swallowing the liquid hastily. 

“Now you!” Bad grabbed the bottle and drank the remaining in one gulp. 

“You start shooting, I’ll keep the endermen away.” Skeppy looked like he wanted to protest, but the blue-clad man seemed to think better of it. He spun and dashed for one of the towers, Badboyhalo followed, knowing what his friend intended. Once Skeppy had gotten to the tower he started to climb, throwing caution to the wind and gripping the obsidian for any purchase. 

“Don’t go too high!” Skeppy’s response couldn’t be heard over the screeching of endermen, but Bad knew it was probably deserving of a ‘language’. Once he had gotten a bit off the ground Skeppy slammed the point of his pickaxe into the wall with all the force he could muster. He yanked on it, and when it held, he hopped on top of the handle, leaning back and balancing on the makeshift platform precariously. 

Bad was forced to focus on the surrounding endermen while Skeppy started making shots. The twang of the bow was a comforting anchor in the chaos. 

They were together.

* * *

Tommy almost laughed when Tubbo threw a glass bottle on the ground in front of them. The action was so absurd and random that it broke his concentration completely. Fortunately, Tubbo and Wilbur were on the same page. The bottle only held a small amount of water, but it was enough to burn the feet of any endermen who got too close. Wilbur and Tubbo danced in and out of the damp area, maneuvering in the newly opened space. 

Tommy caught on quickly.

“How many of those do you have?”

“Just two more.” Tubbo sounded grim, the thin layer of water would only be effective for so long. 

BANG

Tommy was shocked to hear another crystal explode, then another. His eyes traced the area until he spotted Skeppy, somehow standing on the side of a tower, shooting them down one by one. He refused to let that good work, and absolutely stupid plan, go to waste. 

“Tubbo! Start shooting the dragon, almost all the crystals are down.” Tubbo nodded and backed up into the protected zone. Almost immediately the dragon roared in pain. The arrows were finding their marks. 

They could do this! Somehow, they were alive, and it was working!

They were going to kill the dragon!

His communicator pinged.

Tommy had no chance to check it before a wave of endermen tore forward, overwhelming the meager water with sheer numbers. 

Wilbur seemed to have frozen, getting tossed backwards into Tubbo when a blow connected. Tommy spared a glance where his eldest brother was looking. Hundreds of endermen were pouring out onto the platform from the portal. A wave of tall monsters and purple eyes covered the endstone, rapidly expanding like a drop of ink. 

They couldn’t do this.

* * *

“That’s the last one!” Skeppy half-shouted triumphantly, voice hoarse but filled with pride.

“Good! Start taking shots at the dragon Skeppy!” Bad was trying to keep his voice calm, but the endermen were rapidly becoming too much to deal with. Once they had started pouring through the portal there was no time to stop, there was no warding them off, they all just charged forward constantly. Whenever Bad would hit one another would fill its place. His armor was getting really banged up now, and a huge crack ran down the length of his shield. This needed to end soon. 

Bad was struggling to focus, he couldn’t even see the others across the open space anymore. All he could do was keep fighting and hope they were okay. 

A strong clawed hand wrapped around the corner of his shield, digging into the wood. Bad tried to yank it away—

He didn’t hear the roar until it was too late. 

The ender dragon charged in on wounded wings, but it didn’t come for him. He hadn’t been the one shooting it. Bad looked up just in time to see Skeppy tossed sideways bodily, scooped up by a single clawed arm and sent flying.

“SKEPPY!!!”

* * *

They had no space, no time, no way to make a plan. The endermen just kept coming. Tubbo tossed another bottle, giving them a moment to gather themselves. But it only lasted a moment. Tubbo could see Tommy from the corner of his eyes, the blond was bleeding and bruised, now limping due to an injury on his leg as well. Tubbo was on Wilbur’s other side, bow tossed down in the immediate threat. Wilbur was just managing to hold his own, but he was no fighter. He also was getting increasingly worn down the longer the fight went on. Tubbo wasn’t an exception either. He knew his movements were slower than they should be, but he was nearly out of strength. 

Tubbo felt himself growing numb. He only had enough energy left to fight, nothing to spare for feelings. He wished Philza were here. And Technoblade. He tried not to think about the sound of the communicator pinging. 

This couldn’t go on. They needed to end it. 

“Tommy!” The blond responded to his urgency.

“Yeah?”

“Next time the dragon lands, we have to charge it. We’ve got to kill it, now!”

Tommy couldn’t stop to discuss it, but they both knew they had to try. 

They kept fighting in silence, racking up kills and wounds in equal measure. The swarm never seemed to deplete. 

* * *

Tommy knew Tubbo was right. They might all die instantly, but there wasn’t an option. All they would do is prolong their deaths if they stayed here. He started trying to track the dragon’s movements. He knew it would land eventually, it was staggering in its flight, the arrows had done some damage to its wings. They just needed the opportunity. 

The opportunity came suddenly. The ender dragon whirled around in the air, dropping down towards the center of the clearing with half folded wings. Tommy nodded at Tubbo, Wilbur looked at them both, and all three charged. 

“Go!” Tommy led the way, taking wild stabs at endermen surrounding them, trying to make any sort of space. The dragon seemed to notice their approach, it turned, presenting them with the side of its body and arching its back in a cat-like manner. Its wings were spread defensively, but one hung oddly. 

Tubbo threw the last bottle of water at the ground in front of it. The splash of liquid cleared just a little space, but it would have to do. Tommy got there first, he dodged the dragon’s open maw when it snapped at him, getting past to her shoulder. He sunk the sword in as deeply as he could, only yanking it out when the dragon shook and threatened to make him lose it entirely. 

The dragon roared in pain, twisting around towards the three. Tommy rushed again, Tubbo now by his side while Wilbur kept the endermen at bay. He managed to inflict a slashing wound across its face—

It reared up on its back legs, one clawed forearm swept towards him with crushing force, he was completely open and vulnerable—

The blow didn’t land, Tommy stumbled backwards when pushed, and then Tubbo was there. The smaller boy held his shield to catch the blow, he was tossed away by the pure force of it. Tommy saw Tubbo land in a heap behind him, he was furious, ready to charge again when…

The ender dragon opened her mouth wide, purple particles danced at the edges. Wilbur had his back to the dragon, fighting off endermen, he couldn’t dodge. 

Tommy made the only choice he could. He protected his brother. 

Tommy tackled the taller man at a full sprint, he felt terrible pain envelop his legs, burning the skin as they rolled on the hard ground. The dragons breath left an oily burning residue that didn’t fade away quickly. Tommy heard his own wails as the substance continued to burn even after they were a distance away from the source. 

His blurry vision saw Wilbur fighting above him. 

This was it. 

Surely… please…

He tried vainly to ignore the incredible pain and force himself to his feet. It was unbearable. 

“Wil… please…” His brother turned in concern when he heard him, Wil’s brown eyes were filled with tears. Tommy had one thing he wanted to say before he passed out.

“Don’t die on us.” 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> They've reached the end... 
> 
> I LOVE reading people's responses to these chapters, comments are beyond delightful...  
> Thank you for reading and for all the support!  
> <3--R&T


	12. Sunshine

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Their numbers are dwindling far too fast.   
> Do they even have a chance?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Things are rough.  
> (Reminder that everything in this is platonic and friendship/or family! <3)  
> TW: blood, graphic injuries, violence, referenced manipulation, referenced abuse (very vague)

Someone pushed themselves through waves of endermen, one goal fixed in his mind. He had seen a flash of color, they were still out here. He needed to get to them. He didn’t dare dwell on the possibilities of what would happen if he didn’t. His eyes scanned the island for--

There was one! The small boy lay on the ground, momentarily being ignored by the endermen, if only because they were too crowded to do anything more than kick at him. 

He fought his way over to the brunette, Tubbo lay still, the person grimaced when they saw how his arm hung at an awkward angle from the shoulder. They stood next to him, cleaving wide arcs through the enderman with a netherite axe. The person was relieved when Tubbo slowly stirred, carefully blinking his blue eyes. When he recognized who was standing over him, they opened almost impossibly wide.

“Tech… Technoblade?”

“Yep.” Technoblade wielded the borrowed axe with one hand, managing to keep some space open despite being completely surrounded by enemies.

“But… you…. How?” Tubbo’s voice was so unbelieving, Techno was almost offended.

“Don’t you know by now? Technoblade never dies!!” He tossed his catchphrase out with a snort, appreciatively noticing Tubbo working his way to his feet. The boy winced with pain, he was obviously hurt, but he was moving. And he still had a sword gripped in his good arm. 

“Where are Tommy and Wilbur?” Tubbo looked around desperately. Technoblade had trouble trying to search the area visibly, there were too many tall endermen, but he spotted a burst of movement in the swarm nearby. 

Techno started furiously chopping through enemies, working his way towards the movement with Tubbo at his side. Eventually he got close enough to understand what he was seeing. 

Wilbur stood over where Tommy lay prone. Every part of him was covered in blood. The eldest had a wild glint to his eyes as he frantically defended his brother. Techno didn’t hesitate to rush towards him, making sure Tubbo stayed in tow. 

“Wha—”

“Later” Technoblade was not about to waste precious breath on this conversation. “Dragon?”

“Over there” Wilbur indicated towards the center of the ring of pillars. Sure enough, the large form of the dragon could be seen. Techno was relieved to realize she was injured. They had done good work. 

“We need to kill it.” Technoblade was aware he was tiring too fast. The strength potion had worn off a while ago and the battle rush was all that kept him moving. The desire to protect his family pushed him forward even now. 

“Tubbo, protect Tommy. I’m going to go with Techno.” Wilbur’s voice somehow had remained smooth, it was filled with a relaxed certainty. 

Technoblade nodded. 

“Let’s go.”

* * *

Wilbur ignored every distraction, every injury, every memory. Tommy, Techno, Tubbo. They were his family. He would either protect them, kill the ender dragon, or die trying. 

He followed close behind Technoblade in their wild charge, every beat of his heart reminding him of why he was here. They all came here to save him. He was terrible, they still cared. He didn’t know why, but he wanted to learn. 

His sword was chipped and dulling despite being crafted from diamond. Occasionally he would have to pause to rip it free from where it stuck in an enderman. 

They were almost there. 

The dragon looked restful, casually perching near a ring of stones that looked almost like a nest. She alerted at their approach, and snarled. The dragon’s lips pulled back to bare long teeth, the threat of purple fire hovering behind them. 

When Wilbur charged forward it was for Technoblade, the warrior without equal who stayed with him and fought for him the whole way. 

He swung his sword into the dragon’s chest for Tubbo, who had believed in him and told him he could be better. 

When Technoblade tossed him the glowing axe and threw himself at the dragon bodily, Wilbur swung the weapon downwards in an arc for Tommy. His brother that he hurt. His brother that willingly took on more pain to save him. 

When the dragons head was been separated from its body, Wilbur did it for his family.

**WilburSoot has made the advancement [Free the End]**

* * *

Technoblade almost collapsed when the dragon faded out of existence. They did it. The relief flooded him, draining all his energy with it. 

It was short lived. 

He cried out when sharp pain tugged into his shoulder. An enderman dug its claws in deeper, trying to rip him apart. He just managed to shove it away with the broken shield, heart racing as blood poured from the wound. 

The endermen hadn’t stopped attacking, Wilbur was trying to fend them off with the axe, but he wasn’t proficient with the weapon. They were hurt and tired.

The endermen were still attacking. They were swarmed in an instant.

Technoblade’s heart sank when Tubbo screamed in pain from the distance. 

They had done it.

They had still failed.

* * *

Badboyhalo dragged Skeppy to the nearest tower as he coughed and wheezed painfully. The dragon looked like it had just landed somewhere else, so they should be safe from it for a moment. 

The fall and subsequent attacks from the endermen had done a number on Skeppy. Bad had to fight back tears as his friend sat in a crumpled heap, choking out huge wet coughs. But there were so many endermen. Bad had no time, he just had to keep fighting. There was no slowing down, no chance to really check on his friend. All he could do was keep the endermen away from him, and hope the others were having any success. 

He was forced a bit away, again and again taking minor blows, armor breaking down over time. He was overwhelmed, what could he do? The dragon roared somewhere, Bad couldn’t even see it. He hoped that meant it would die soon, maybe they killed it? 

Bad spun when he heard Skeppy gasp. An enderman had gotten past Bad and stood over him where he sat against the obsidian. One clawed hand was drawn back, ready to rip open the smaller man’s exposed throat. Skeppy couldn’t move. 

Bad could.

The ender dragon hybrid tried not to cry out as the strike tore through the armor on his back, leaving claw marks in its wake. He tipped his head forward, forehead gently bumping Skeppy’s own as he kneeled over him, protecting him with his own body. He bit his lip to fight the pain.

“Bad?” Skeppy’s voice was barely audible, blood dripped from the corner of his mouth. But he held his wrist up to Bad’s eyes, showing him the message displayed there shakily.

**WilburSoot has made the advancement [Free the End]**

Badboyhalo bit back a shriek of pain when his armor failed, another set of lines scored in his back, already bleeding heavily. 

The dragon was dead, why were the endermen still attacking? He was here, what was he supposed to do? He didn’t know, Dream never said, he said if he was there, he could just influence them, he didn’t want them to attack, why wasn’t it working?! It should be working!

“Stop!” Bad shouted, moving his head so his cheek rested against Skeppy’s temple. Another set of lines made of white-hot pain drew down his back harshly. It wasn’t working.

“No, no, no, no no no no, please stop, please I’m sorry” Bad started pleading, he just wanted to protect everyone, why wouldn’t they stop?

“Bad.” Skeppy’s voice barely registered with him as pain sparked near his ribs. For a dreadful moment Bad was sure he would be dragged away from Skeppy by the claws digging into his side. 

He wasn’t. While the wound was incredibly painful, Skeppy clung to his coat, he didn’t let go.

“Bad, I’m here.” Skeppy broke into another fit of coughing, more blood leaked from his lips. 

“We’re together right? ‘Till the end of the muffin Bad. We can do this.” Bad held Skeppy close, whimpering in fear and pain. He couldn’t, it wasn’t working, he was failing them, failing Skeppy, failing everyone!

He needed to protect them! He was failing!

Failing--

“Bad, it’s okay. Just calm down with me, I—” Skeppy’s voice cracked as he dropped into another painful wheeze. “It hurts, will you sing me a song?” The request was so absurd, so unexpected, that it nearly jolted Bad out of his panicked inner-dialogue. He gasped and tucked his head closer to Skeppy’s when another enderman took the chance to attack him. 

“Please Bad?” Bad couldn’t say no. His voice was wet, pained, and weak, but he sang the first comforting song he could come up with. 

“You are my sunshine, my only sunshine

You make me happy, when skies are grey

You’ll never know dear, how much I love you

Please don’t take my sunshine away”

Bad stopped and took a halting breath, but Skeppy choked out more words.

“Again? Please, Bad.” Bad obliged.

“You are my sunshine, my only sunshine”

Skeppy joined in, voice barely audible, but singing along nonetheless

“You make me happy, when skies are grey”

Bad gently rocked a little, breathing slowing with the act of singing.

“You’ll never know dear, how much I love you

Please don’t take my sunshine away”

Together they sang. It was off key, terribly out of sync, and they both messed up the words. 

It was beautiful. 

Bad slowly felt a feeling of calm drift over him as they sang. It was okay. They were together.

They were safe. 

The endermen stilled.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> They did it.   
> AHHHH I've been waiting to share this chapter for ages now..... I hope you enjoyed it.... Technoblade never dies!  
> Also, this chapter is very short, because of that (and because of new years) the next chapter of this story will be going up in a few hours, double update day!!!  
> Happy New Year to you all. I'm so happy to have found a new passion and love for writing this year.  
> Thank you for reading,  
> <3--R&T


	13. A sigh of relief

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The dragon is dead.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Second chapter in one day!! <3  
> This chapter has some intense descriptions of injuries and burns. 
> 
> TW: blood, graphic descriptions of injury, anxiety, referenced abuse, referenced manipulation, brief vomiting

Wilbur was certain he was dead, the endermen had knocked him down, nearly ripped him apart, then everything just… stopped.

Wilbur pushed himself up on one elbow incredulously. The tall beings were just milling around aimlessly. They were passively spreading out, never so much as glancing at him. 

It had worked. 

Wilbur jolted as the shock started to wear off. His body was hurting, badly. There was barely a single part of him unmarred from the fight. He heard groaning from nearby. 

“Techno?” Wilbur forced out the word, turning his head towards the noise.

“Bruuuuuuh….” Technoblade was laying flat on the ground, but he was conscious. He was also tilting his head to look back at Wilbur. 

Wilbur smiled wanly at his brother, look at them, a right mess. What was missing…? Tommy. Tubbo.

Wilbur managed to stumble to his feet in newfound panic. He took care to keep his eyes down, not to look any endermen in the eyes. He wasn’t going to risk aggravating them. He peered between long torsos and hanging arms until he saw it. Green, white, red, Techno managed to stumble after him as the two moved towards their brothers. 

“Tommy? Tubbo?” Wilbur breathed a great sigh of relief when he saw the two. Tubbo and Tommy sat on the ground side by side, both glassy eyed and in pain. They were alive though. They looked up at him, Tommy even managed to crack a smile. 

“You look—you look like shit Wil.” Wilbur stared at his brother with wide eyes. Tommy sat there with blond hair stained red with his own blood, torn armor and shirt, and legs burnt all to hell, and he had the gall to say Wilbur looked like shit. 

“Pfffft you—” Wilbur started laughing, long and hard, he practically fell down on the ground to sit, shoulders heaving with involuntary laughter. 

Before he knew it, all four were laughing. Deep laughs of relief, of stress, of happiness to be together and alive.

They sat on the ground, covered in their own blood, and laughed.

* * *

Tommy couldn’t tell you when the laughter turned to tears. He almost didn’t notice he was crying until Tubbo squeezed his hand. 

The other boy had switched over to crying as well. 

They were alive; Wilbur was alive. 

They had done it. 

Tubbo was the one to dry his tears enough to speak first. 

“Hey…” The smaller boy’s voice sounded pained. “Where are Bad and Skeppy?” Slowly Tommy and the rest quieted. There were still too many endermen milling about to see, but Techno stiffened oddly.

“Do you hear that?” Wilbur nodded, head tilting.

“Are they fucking singing?” 

* * *

They all started to stand up, wanting to find the other two before they lost all semblance of energy. Technoblade was running on empty, but he kept himself moving for now. When Tubbo went to stand, Techno stopped him.

“Let me see your shoulder.” Tubbo grimaced and nodded at him. “Does this hurt?”

The brunette gasped a yelp at the slightest touch, pulling away, but only causing himself more pain via the sudden movement.

“It’s dislocated, I need to set it back in place. Once it’s in place it will start to feel better.” Techno looked at his brother gently. This was going to be painful, he had experience. “Bite down on your bandanna okay?” Tubbo gamely stuck the bit of cloth in his mouth, before screwing his face up and trying to mumble around it.

“It tastes like blood.” Techno snorted, firmly gripping the arm at the elbow with one hand, and gently resting his useless hand on the shoulder to keep it steady. Tubbo tensed up. 

Techno let out a deep breath. “Tubbo, what is your favorite…. Uhhh….. flower?” Tubbo looked completely confused, but answered anyway, voice barely coherent past the cloth. It didn’t matter, that wasn’t the point of the question. 

“Well, in the garden there are always poppies, but I like the ones that—” Tubbo shrieked in pain as the shoulder popped into place. Techno leaned forward, surprised to find himself holding the boy close to his chest while he sputtered for air. 

“There… okay… better?” Tubbo hesitantly moved his shoulder, spitting out the bandanna as he did so. 

“Uh… Yeah!” Tubbo sounded surprised and Techno hid a small smile. Good. 

When he stood up Wilbur was half carrying Tommy, whose legs were too messed up to walk on, waiting for Tubbo and Techno to join them. 

Carefully they all started working their way towards the sound of singing. 

* * *

Tubbo was fighting off the pain to keep up with his family. He suspected that once they got to Bad and Skeppy he would be able to sit down for a long time. He hoped so anyway. 

When they got close Tubbo peered around Tommy’s side, where he had been helping Wilbur support his best friend, trying to get a look. He gasped and rushed forward when he saw them; Tubbo found just enough energy to get to his friends first. 

They were up against the obsidian pillar. Skeppy’s back was to the black surface, arms gently wrapped around Bad. The ender dragon hybrid’s head was resting on his friend’s shoulder as he half-kneeled, slumped against him limply. Tubbo was surprised to realize it was Skeppy who was singing. His voice sounded wrong, far too wet, but he was persistently murmuring out the words into his friend’s ear. 

The reason Bad was unconscious was immediately clear. The man was absolutely soaked in blood, his back was torn with deep cuts, gaping and visible past his robe. White bone glistened wrongly where the skin on his shoulder was flayed away. Tubbo dropped down next to him, reaching a hand towards them, then just letting it hover. What should he do? 

Tubbo looked back helplessly at the others. They seemed as stunned as he felt, but per usual Techno was the first to snap out of it. 

“Tommy, start messaging Niki and anyone else back at home, tell them to get to world spawn with medical supplies. And a stretcher.” Tubbo heard tapping as Tommy jumped to the task, he had been placed back on the ground by Wilbur gently. Techno reached forward, cautiously trying to pull Bad off Skeppy, but the smaller man had a death grip on his robes.

“You are my sunshine, my only sunshine” 

Skeppy’s voice faded into humming. He didn’t even seem to be aware they were there. Blank eyes stared past them aimlessly. Tubbo noticed Techno grimace, and followed his gaze. 

Skeppy’s hoodie was more purple and red than blue. His chin and chest were soaked in dark blood. While Tubbo watched, the man coughed thickly, and more blood dripped from his mouth. 

“What do we do?” Tubbo looked up at Wilbur and Technoblade hopefully. They both looked just as lost as him. Tubbo felt himself tense. “We’ve got to do something!” His shout seemed to spark something in his older brothers. They both started moving.

“We don’t have any health potions?” Techno shook his head at Wilbur’s question. 

“’Til the end of the muffin.” Skeppy was mumbling nonsense deliriously. 

“Okay. Wilbur, try to pack Bad’s back with anything you have, just stop the bleeding if you can. As soon as that is done we…” Techno trailed off, swaying dizzily. Tubbo reached out a hand as if to steady him. None of them were in good shape. 

“We need to get to the portal, right?” Tommy spoke up, he was clearly in nearly unbearable pain, tense with agony. It was hard for Tubbo to even look at his legs, he couldn’t bear to see his best friend hurt like this.

“Yeah. But I don’t know if we can carry them.” 

Tubbo opened his mouth to protest Techno’s point, but he had to be logical. The four of them could hardly walk, Tommy certainly couldn’t on his own, but still…

“We can’t just leave them!”

“I’m not suggesting that.” Techno snorted at him. “You three should go through the portal. I’ll stay here until…” Tubbo shook his head vigorously. 

“We… I want to stay too.” 

“Hey, guys, hey guys!” Tommy tried to get their attention. “Did you know Dream fucking died?” Tubbo was not prepared for the non-sequitur. He glanced at his own communicator incredulously.

**Dream was slain by endermen**

**WilburSoot has made the advancement [Free the End]**

**< Sapnap> Did it work?**

**< Sapnap> Hello?**

**< Tommy> We need anyone available to get to world spawn, with medical supplies and shit**

**< Tommy> Everyone is really hurt**

**< Niki> I will be there in 5 minutes**

“Listen, you lot are only going to get worse the longer we sit here without medical attention. We need to go through the portal.” Technoblade’s words were firm, too tired for his usual sarcastic humor. 

“Tubbo’s right, we have to try to get them through.” Wilbur was trying to take charge this time. 

“We are only going to make it worse if we start dragging them around. Are any of you able to carry either of them?” Tubbo looked around at his brothers. Wilbur had sat on the ground next to Bad, absolutely soaked in blood and faintly trembling as he held a cloth to the ender dragon hybrid’s back. Tommy couldn’t walk, much less carry someone. Tubbo’s arm was still hardly functioning, and he was bruised and battered beyond exhaustion. Techno was no better off, one of his arms was still severely injured and he had lost a lot of blood since then. 

Even Tubbo had to admit the answer was no. But still… It didn’t feel right to just…

“Hey! Skeppy? Tommy? Wilbur?” For a moment Tubbo couldn’t place the voice that called out over the expanse. It sounded shy and hesitant and—

“Antfrost?” Tubbo tried to stand, but quickly realized it wasn’t going to happen when his vision started fading. 

“Yeah, Eret and I are here. Where are you? Are you alright?”

“Not really.” Tubbo almost giggled as he looked at the group. He raised his voice again. “Over by one of the pillars, on the left side.”

Footsteps rapidly approached, followed by gasps of concern. 

They were decidedly not alright. 

But they would be.

* * *

Despite having died less than 24 hours before, Philza insisted that he was coming to meet his sons at the world spawn. Niki reluctantly agreed, she knew as much as anyone that he was a force to be reckoned with in his own right. They waited anxiously at the woods, the place Philza had first seen all that time ago, when Techno messaged him with those concerns. Today the wall had been cleared away some, Ponk willingly came along to help at Niki’s request and made a decent path. 

Niki was rushing around, checking that they had stretchers, sorting the potion bags, and organizing everyone. Her urgency was apparent, but somehow, she still radiated calm. Philza appreciated that more than he could express. Quackity was carrying a lot of the supplies, he and Niki had been doing almost nothing but brewing potions since the main group had left. Karl was also there, the typically animated jokester was nervously shuffling, clearly unsure of his place in this, but wanting to help. 

Philza couldn’t take his eyes off the spawn. He waited for his sons to materialize, fear making him tense. He knew they were injured, but…

“Quackity, come with me, someone’s coming thru.” Niki’s commands were gentle, she moved forward briskly towards the spawn point. Philza moved forward too and was there to help steady Eret as he stumbled forward. Immediately Philza started scanning the unconscious form he carried, checking to see if it was—

It was Skeppy, and he looked terrible. Philza felt guilty for the rush of relief that rose in his chest, grateful it wasn’t one of his sons. 

“Ponk, I need the stretcher, Eret put him here. Do you know what’s wrong?” Niki moved with grace despite the circumstances, Philza admired it. He stood ready to support whoever came through next while she worked.

“Not really, but he was coughing up blood earlier.” 

“He’s barely breathing, Quackity I need a heath potion and the strongest regen we have.” Philza heard the urgent ministrations behind him, but focused ahead as another figure materialized. 

Antfrost was a little small to be carrying Bad, and he gratefully allowed Philza to take the ender dragon hybrid, moving alongside and immediately conferring with Niki. Both him and Eret were pretty banged up, but they were functioning. 

“Skeppy’s got broken ribs, multiple punctures in his lungs, right you saw that. I’ll start on Bad, who has potions?” Antfrost followed Philza to the other stretcher, dropping down next to Bad and rolling him on his side. Philza couldn’t stifle a gasp, suddenly realizing that even briefly carrying the man resulted in his own clothes being slicked in blood. 

“Quackity, get Antfrost what he needs, then grab me the bag with the strength potions.” Niki sounded a little scared, but there wasn’t time for Philza to check on it. More figures started to materialize. The moment of truth. 

His sons appeared too slowly, Philza just wanted to rush forward and hold them in his arms, to never let go again. He stopped himself in time, taking stock of their injuries. They were barely standing, all four clinging to each other for dear life. 

“Here, Tommy.” Philza saw that Tommy was being supported by the others completely, feet not touching the ground. He scooped the blond up in his arms, one arm carefully supporting his back, the other beneath his knees. Tommy was barely conscious, whimpering in pain when touched. 

“He’s got bad burns on his legs.” Philza met Techno’s eyes appraisingly. His warrior son looked ready to collapse, his shoulder was bleeding and one arm hung limply. The other arm was wrapped around Tubbo, guiding the smaller boy to walk forward. 

And Wilbur. Wilbur was a mess. There was no way of telling his injuries, he was just covered in too much blood to even start to guess. Even his hair was spiked up as the blood dried in it. But gentle brown eyes met Phil’s blue ones.

“Hi dad.”

* * *

When the group managed to get back to Niki’s house, where she had built a makeshift hospital over the past months, she was still primarily focused on trying to stabilize Skeppy. Quackity felt absolutely useless. Sure, he was carrying stuff around and had helped with some of the brewing, but when faced with the actual injuries he froze. 

Honestly Quackity didn’t understand how Niki fucking did it. 

He ended up following Antfrost around and fetching the cat hybrid supplies for treating the others. Badboyhalo was touch and go, but the brothers all needed treatment too. Karl had been stationed next to Bad, with strict orders to shout if anything changed. Quackity wished he had gotten that job instead. 

Once back at the hospital Technoblade, Tommy, Tubbo, and Wilbur had almost immediately passed out. Philza hadn’t left their sides either. It gave Quackity a sort of heartwarming feeling to see the whole family together, in that icky sweet way. But also, like, they were hurt really fucking bad.

Tommy’s main injury was the burns on his legs, they looked like badly cooked meat. Quackity had rushed to the bathroom and thrown up upon seeing them, but he came back. He thought he deserved some credit for that. 

When Antfrost started to treat them, the poor kid woke up for a minute, started thrashing and screaming. Philza held him still while Antfrost numbed the area, using selective weakness potions to stop the pain. Apparently, he didn’t like to do that often, Quackity quickly learned that the usually quiet cat hybrid talked constantly while he worked, but it was necessary. 

Quackity had given all four members of the family regen potions to drink when they first got through the portal, but they needed more than that. Once Tommy’s legs were bandaged Antfrost had moved on to Technoblade. The warrior was beaten to hell. Quackity was always a little scared of him, and why not!? He was bleeding from a dozen wounds, couldn’t use one hand at all, and somehow walked back here on his own two feet! 

While Antfrost treated Tubbo, Philza started cleaning off Wilbur and stitching him up. He needed some of that blood washed away to know where the actual wounds were. Quackity’s heart turned when he looked at little Tubster. The kid was pale and coughing, shaking intermittently. Like the others he had dozens of scratches and cuts that needed attention. Quackity was glad they made that spider farm because holy fuck they were going through a lot of string for stitches. 

Finally, Wilbur had gotten treated. Dude looked like he had walked through a thresher, every bit of him was covered in claw marks. It was a miracle nothing vital had been hit. Philza teared up when he saw how close some of the cuts were to his neck. Quackity respectfully averted his eyes. Philza had taken care of most of it, but Antfrost still gave the man a once-over. He was going to be okay.

Quackity was happy his friends were alive. 

Eventually Philza passed out too, leaning on his son’s bedside. 

The whole family was together.

Fucking beautiful.

* * *

Niki was weary, but she took another sip of lukewarm tea, determined to stay awake. She had managed to get Skeppy breathing slightly better, but only just. There was still a large possibility he wouldn’t make it, despite the medical attention. She rested one hand on his chest, feeling it move. She kept an eye on Bad as well. He had lost enough blood that Antfrost had to straight inject him with regen, otherwise…

Niki didn’t like to think about that would’ve, what still could happen if her medical skills weren’t good enough. Ever since that day with Wilbur, helpless while Bad and Skeppy lay unconscious, she was determined to learn. Determined to collect the knowledge she needed to help. Still, the two laying on cots… it was all too familiar. But at this point, she had done all she could. 

Niki smiled faintly as Bad twitched in his sleep. 

She had taken a page from Tubbo’s book earlier. When the men had come in, when she wasn’t sure either of them were going to make it, she had Ponk help her push their cots together. 

She gently arranged their hands within each other’s grip. 

The best friends laid there, clasping hands. They had done it. 

They would want to be together, no matter what happened now.

* * *

Tommy woke up slowly, automatically squinting his eyes and peering around him with a groan. 

Ugh, why does everything hurt so much? Where is he and why…

“Tommy! Niki said you would wake up today but I didn’t know when and—”

“Ugh…” Tommy’s mind felt beyond fuzzy. It felt like it was filled with cotton balls. He might have been more concerned if not for the reassuring presence of Tubbo, bouncing on the edge of the bed next to him. 

“Where…”

“Oh! This is Niki’s hospital, we were all here, but Techno didn’t want to be around everyone so Philza and him went home yesterday, but I stayed here with you.” Tommy tried to take stock of his surroundings, fortunately Tubbo had to pause for breath, his best friend was practically jittering. 

It was a hospital all right. The weird cloth walls and uncomfortable cots confirmed it. But why?

Slowly events kept coming back… the rush to the end portal… fighting the dragon… pushing Wilbur away from the dragons breath…

Tommy gasped and yanked the thin sheet off his legs, then immediately regretted it when the colder air caused a burst of pain. 

“Fucking ow!” Tubbo tittered a little, before getting serious again.

“That’s why Niki and Antfrost wanted to keep you asleep! They wanted your legs to heal more before you woke up so they wouldn’t hurt as bad.” Tubbo had one arm in a sling and an assortment of bandages. Tommy scrutinized the bandages wrapped around his own legs, they looked fucking metal as shit. 

“Tubbo, how long have I been asleep?”

“Just a couple, uh, three days, I think? I was unconscious for a day so maybe four? But only because they wanted you asleep. Otherwise, you would’ve woken up sooner.”

Tommy silenced Tubbo by sitting up and pushing him off the bed. 

“How did we get here? Last I remember we were in the end.” Tubbo tilted his head curiously. 

“Well, Ant and Eret showed up and helped us and Bad and Skeppy get to the portal.”

Tommy flicked his eyes around the room, suddenly remembering how poorly they had been. 

“Did they…?”

Tommy reached towards his friend when Tubbo looked down at the ground, eyes filling with tears. 

“They got back here but,” Tubbo sniffed and wiped his eyes, Tommy scooted so there was room on the bed again. “Skeppy… he died the day I woke up. Niki… she did all she could. Antfrost said they had healed his lungs enough that when he respawned there shouldn’t be any serious long-term effects. But he was just too hurt.”

Tommy let Tubbo rest his head on his shoulder, leaning into him. 

“It was kinda nice though, cause Bad woke up just long enough to hold him and sing to him and stuff while… while it happened” Tubbo paused and clutched Tommy’’s hand. “Antfrost went back to the house with Bad when Skeppy respawned, so they’re there now. I heard Bad immediately passed out again too, I don’t actually know if he’s woken up for real yet.” 

Tommy squeezed Tubbo’s hand gently. Taking a moment in silence to appreciate their friends. 

“Tommy?” The voice was faint from behind the curtain, but recognizable all the same. “It’s Wilbur, can I come in?”

Tommy seriously considered telling him to fuck off. But… he did want to see him. 

“Yeah, come on.”

Wilbur stepped sheepishly around the curtain; brown eyes concerned. He was a sight to see, the tall brunette was absolutely covered in bandages from head to toe. Tommy couldn’t help but snort a laugh, he looked like a mummy. His brother hovered near the entrance apprehensively, opening and closing his mouth like a fish out of water.

Eventually, Wilbur reached a hand up and rubbed the back of his neck, looking at the floor as he found his words.

“Hi Tommy.” Tommy nodded a response, feeling Tubbo gently rubbing his knuckles. He focused on the calming sensation. “I, I’m really glad to see you, that you’re alright. That is…” Wilbur shook his head and looked up, meeting Tommy’s eyes.

“I had spent the last couple days thinking about what I would say when you woke up, but now that I’m here, my plans have gone all screwy.” Wilbur took a deep breath, Tommy tried to keep an open mind. “I know, I don’t have all my memories yet. But I have some and… I was awful. There isn’t an excuse, I was a miserable excuse for a human being, much less a brother.” Words slipped from Tommy’s mouth before he could bite his tongue. 

“You could say that again, dickhead.” Wilbur pursed his lips in a wane smile.

“I was a dickhead, and an asshole, and every other colorful description you could come up with Tommy. I know… I will never be able to make it up to you and Tubbo. But I want to try! If, if you’ll let me.” Tommy felt a surge of bitterness rise to his mouth. Oh, make it about him. A familiar fear made him withdraw in on himself. Here was Wilbur out to get what he wanted again. 

“No, wait. I’m, ugh, I’m doing this all wrong, Tommy. I’m sorry. I am so, so, sorry for everything I put you through. You don’t need to forgive me or be around me Tommy, you have no obligations to do anything. It’s on me to… to learn what you need. To do whatever is best for you. Whether that be distance or apologies or helping you stab shit.” Wilbur’s eyes were filled with tears. Some of the bitterness washed away at his obvious sincerity. Still, Tommy had learned to be defensive. 

“That’s… nice.” His tone was clipped. He wanted… he was glad Wilbur… but… Tommy buried his face in his hands, trying to breathe steadily through all the feelings. 

“I’ll go now Tommy, just know… I promise never to hurt you or Tubbo like that again. My promise is probably meaningless now, but I won’t let myself—I won’t let that happen.” Wilbur swept out of the makeshift room quickly. 

Wilbur was right. His promise didn’t mean anything. 

But Tommy… Tommy wanted to believe it anyway. Wilbur sounded like he used to. Tommy missed that Wilbur more than he would admit. 

Maybe someday it would be more than just words.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> There we go! This story is NOT ending yet! There is a still a lot for this family to work out. 
> 
> At least we ended the self-sacrifice cycle with Antfrost and Eret showing up. I swear those four would have all just sat there for hours without making a decision if not for them. 
> 
> Poor Skeppy, but he'll respawn. he was true to his word though. Even when they were in the End he didn't leave Bad. 
> 
> Thank you everyone who reads this! If you want to let me know what you're thinking/feeling about the story thus far, I LOVE reading comments. They bring me so much motivation and joy.   
> <3  
> \--R&T


	14. The meaning of Togetherness

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> They are all back from their adventure.  
> It's time for healing to start.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am so sorry for the delay in getting this chapter out!! I will explain in the end notes, but my apologies.
> 
> Time for everyone to start settling into normal life again. 
> 
> TW: anxiety, panic attack, vomiting, blood, violence, referenced death, referenced abuse and manipulation

The day that all his sons were well enough to come home was a wonderful day for Philza. Naturally Wilbur didn’t come back to the house, they agreed that none of them were ready for that. But his eldest had moved back in with Fundy, the fox hybrid seemed… begrudging, but had allowed him to stay for now. Wilbur chose to live in L’Manburg for the time being, to get his memories back and to help rebuild in earnest from the destruction he caused. 

Philza thought that was a good idea. He didn’t like being away from his son, but he knew everyone in L’Manburg would help keep him safe. Niki had been practically hovering over Wilbur since he got back, constantly checking his injuries and forcing health potions down his throat. Wilbur accepted the care good-naturedly; Philza suspected his son recognized Niki’s attempts to cope with not having been able to save Skeppy.

“Ow! Tubbo!!” Philza heard annoyed shouting from the living room. He looked around the corner to see Tommy holding up a cookie, far out of Tubbo’s reach, and the shorter boy grinning impishly. 

“What’s going on in here?” Tubbo instantly put on an innocent face when he noticed Philza there. Philza had to fight to keep his face stern.

“Tubbo bit me!!!” Tommy sounded absolutely outraged. 

Tubbo only smirked. 

“Why?” Philza struggled to hold it together.

“He stole the last cookie, and he’s way too tall! Plus, his legs are still hurt, and I didn’t want to tackle him soooo…” 

“Problem solved.” Technoblade walked up behind and easily snatched the cookie out of Tommy’s raised hand, stuffing it in his own mouth before either could react. Both younger boys turned towards him openmouthed. 

Tommy sputtered nonsense, Tubbo just looked incredibly offended. Philza couldn’t keep his amusement in check any longer. 

The blond man bent over in laugher, leaning heavily on the counter as his shoulders heaved with unrestrained cackling. 

“Well, I’m glad someone finds this funny.” Tommy’s voice was dry, but he was snickering soon after. Tubbo spun and poked Techno in the chest.

“YOU have to make more!” The piglin hybrid raised both hands in surrender. 

“BruuuuuUuuUUuh… who do you think made the first batch.” Tubbo’s startled surprise made Philza break down in another round of laughter. Tubbo started giggling too.

“I thought—I thought you only cooked?” The brunette’s eyes were sparkling as he spoke, standing directly in front of Technoblade without a trace of fear. 

“Yeah, making cookies is cooking, it’s right in the name.” Techno couldn’t seem to comprehend why this made everyone laugh louder. 

“Whut?!”

It was good to be home.

* * *

Dream had always thought the worst part of respawning was waking up alone and completely vulnerable. So when he jerked into consciousness he immediately shoved himself upright, one hand covering his face, the other reaching for his axe. The movement was intercepted.

“Dream, here.” Rather than his axe Dream felt something smooth meet his hand. In a moment the round mask was being secured on his face, as he slipped it on, the interior briefly reflected greyish-blue light back at him. Once it was on Dream breathed a little easier. He let himself lean backwards, head spinning.

“Dream? Hey, I’m right here.” The bed shifted as someone carefully sat on the edge, giving Dream some space. Dream focused his eyes in the dim light. George’s glasses glinted where they rested on top of his head. The smaller man looked at him gently, concern gracing his face. Dream reached out a hand.

“Sapnap?” Dream’s voice sounded raspy to his own ears as George took the offered hand, gently running his thumb over his knuckles and reassuring Dream he wasn’t alone. 

“He’s fine, over there.” Dream followed George’s indication to the other side of the room. Sapnap was laying in another bed, snoring loudly. Dream jerked as something flew past his head. Sapnap jumped awake when the pillow George had thrown hit its mark, smacking him on the face. 

“Whuuu?” Dream lightly wheezed out a laugh as Sapnap wiped the sleepy drool off his own face, gazing around with tired eyes.

“Dream is awake idiot.” George’s voice had the slightest trace of amusement. Sapnap practically leapt over alongside Dream, casually snuggling up next to him despite his half-hearted protests. Once he had settled, Dream cleared his throat to speak up again, one hand gently prodding his own newly-scarred side. 

“What happened?” George rolled his eyes, but willingly started filling Dream in on what had transpired while he was respawning. Dream was relived to know that it had worked. They had done it.

“Wait, Technoblade didn’t die? How?!” It wasn’t like Dream wished death on anyone, but seriously, how did the dude manage that? George shrugged. Dream made a mental note to question his rival about that later. 

As Dream chatted with his friends, and as Sapnap started to doze off again, Dream started to breathe easier. The panic from respawn was slowly fading, and the residual pain was wearing off as Sapnap acted like a living heat pack next to him. He built up the courage to address the one thing that had been weighing him down for days.

“George, I’m so sorry.” Dream stared at his friend, George looked down at the ground, shoulders trembling almost unnoticeably.

“It’s okay. It’s not your fault Dream.” George’s voice was tight. Dream rested a hand on his mask hesitantly. Silently he slipped it downwards, off his face. George turned towards him slightly when the dim light caught his eyes. 

“I should have been more careful. I should have kept you guys closer or fought better or—” Dream saw dark blues and greys reflected in the lenses of the white-rimmed glasses. His voice choked up. “George I’m sorry I didn’t come back, and that I wasn’t here for you.” George stared at him gently. The smaller man’s eyes were filled with tears, but no condemnation was held within them. 

“Dream, you did everything you could. I… I was being careless. It’s hardly entirely your fault what happened.”

“But it was my choice to keep going, to not be here for you when—”

“Dream.” Dream’s guilty tirade was stopped by the firm admonishment. “Don’t torture yourself about this. You had more responsibility than for just me. I understand. I’m just happy you’re here now.”

Dream let the words settle. He didn’t expect to stop dwelling on this anytime soon, but for now he was content to let it rest. 

George moved close to his other side, ruefully bumping him to make some room. Together the three of them just enjoyed the closeness, enjoyed being together. 

Eventually even Dream drifted off to sleep.

Everyone was safe.

* * *

Wilbur sat on the steps with his head in his hands. The memories had been coming back faster since the trip. The recent ones never ceased to be… unpleasant. 

He still really didn’t want to remember all these things, but he would keep trying if it meant he could know how to better apologize and understand what he had done. Sometimes it was just too much though. 

**< WilburSoot> Hey, Philza, are you around L’Manburg today?**

**< Philza> I can be, do you need something?**

**< WilburSoot> No, well yes. If you can. Just some bad memories.**

**< Philza> Of course son, I’ll be there in a bit. Meet you at your house.**

Wilbur sighed; this had become somewhat routine. Wilbur would get a flash of particularly awful memory and Philza would come help him walk through it. Wilbur appreciated his father’s support more than he could express. He didn’t know how he could do this without him. 

Wilbur winced as the memory started in full.

_A white house, moving closer to it carefully._

_Something in his hand, throwing it, an explosion_

_Fighting, he was fighting someone but they were struggling, Blue and red, blue and red_

_Inside the house, angry, furious, betrayal._

_Directed at… directed at… why? No!_

_A hallway._

_Fighting again. Brief pain, easily ignored._

_So self-satisfied, so proud_

_A sword finding its mark, someone stuck against a dark wall_

_Laughing_

_Standing over_

_Watching proudly, happy, angry, betrayed_

_Blood pooling in front of him_

_Watching it happen, victorious, proud_

A touch on his shoulder

“Son, Wil, I’m here. Breathe” Wilbur came back to the present in time to jump to his feet and rush to the side of the path before vomiting heavily into the bushes.

“I—I—” Wilbur couldn’t find the words, he emptied his stomach again, grateful for Philza’s steady grip as he swayed. Philza gently rubbed his back until the vomiting stopped. Wilbur turned to him with tear-filled eyes. 

“Come on son, let’s sit down. I’ve got some water.” Wilbur gratefully followed him to Fundy’s front porch, sitting next to him on the bench. When Philza presented him with a water bottle Wilbur drank it gratefully, swishing the first mouthful around and spitting to get ride of the taste of bile in his mouth. 

Wilbur waited a bit to speak. He couldn’t comprehend the memory. But he needed to. He steeled himself for unwelcome information. 

“Phil, I remembered… I remembered being at a house and fighting someone.” Philza nodded at him patiently. 

“I think I threw some sort of explosive at one person, then, in the house…” Wilbur paused when Philza grimaced audibly. “Do you know what I’m remembering?”

“Yes Wil, I know what you’re talking about.”

“Oh. Well, I was in the house and really angry for some reason… I remember being angry at—at Tommy and Tubbo.” Wilbur paused for a breath, he really wanted to finish talking before he choked up. 

“Then I fought someone else, and somehow I won?” Wilbur almost chuckled, no clue how he accomplished that. 

“But… dad… Did I kill Bad?” Wilbur didn’t want to meet his father’s eyes, he had an answer he wanted to hear, but he was afraid he wouldn’t get it. 

“Yes. You did.” Wilbur breathed heavily trying to process. “You went to his and Skeppy’s house to try and bring Tommy and Tubbo back to Pogtopia. You stunned Skeppy outside, that’s the explosion you remember.” It was coming back more fully as Philza talked, Wilbur almost begged him to stop, but instead wiped his eyes and met his father’s blue ones. He needed to know.

“You injured him, badly. Then you got inside. Badboyhalo had locked the boys in a room to protect them and was guarding the door.”

“But how in the world did I--?”

“You shot him with a poisoned arrow at short range. By the time he realized, you already had the upper hand. You… from what I know you stabbed him after he refused to get out of the way.”

“I stabbed him just below his neck. Then I watched as he bled out.” Wilbur’s tone was hollow. He hated himself, he hated that he remembered being happy about it. “Then I started tearing down the wall. I was almost there, and then I wasn’t. Next I remember I was respawning.” 

“Yes. Techno got there just in time to stop you from getting to the boys.” Wilbur felt tears start streaking down his cheeks in silence. 

“I’m glad.” Wilbur murmured the words earnestly. Wilbur felt Philza’s gentle embrace and leaned into it, appreciating his father’s warmth. “God Phil, they must have been so scared.” Wilbur couldn’t hold back any longer, he broke into sobs, leaning into Philza’s chest for comfort. 

“Yes, they were. Bad managed to buy just enough time, otherwise…”

Wilbur jolted upright.

“I killed him Phil. I fucking killed him, and then he willingly risked death on a mission to save my life!?” Philza nodded gently, tears gathering in his blue eyes as well. 

“Yeah, that’s just the kind of person Bad is.”

“God. I must have seemed like such an ungrateful ass that whole trip.” Wilbur shook his head while Philza let out a single snort of amusement.

“I need to… I need to thank him more. And Skeppy they both…” Wilbur dropped his head in shame. “Dammit Phil, the more I remember the more I hate myself. I hate that I can remember why I did those things and I HATE that sometimes-- sometimes they almost make sense!!” Wilbur realized he was shouting when Philza squeezed his shoulder. 

“I can’t… I can’t fix anything I did.”

There was a long pause before Philza responded, weighing his words in the typical Philza manner.

“No, you can’t fix a lot of what happened.” Wilbur sank lower into himself. “But, you can be better. I know you can. I believe Wil, that if you keep at it, if you’re patient, you can make things better around here. You may have screwed up a lot, and I can’t promise anyone’s forgiveness, that’s theirs alone to determine, but I can promise you one thing.”

Wilbur met his dad’s eyes.

“What?”

“You are still loved Wil.”

* * *

Tommy felt a little apprehensive about visiting L’Manburg, even though Wilbur had promised to stay away. But Philza had told them all there was something to see there this evening, and Tommy trusted Phil. Besides, Tubbo seemed excited to get away from the house for a bit and Tommy could hardly begrudge his friend that. 

Philza led the way in the setting sun. Tommy still slightly resented how much time Philza spent away with Wilbur, but it had lessened over time. He had only seen his brother a couple of times since the ‘quest’ as everyone started calling it. Mostly in passing. 

Tommy thought he was nicer about it now, he was a bit proud of himself for it. Philza wanted to help all of them, and he was still there for Tommy. It was just… hard sometimes to understand. 

“What’s that?!” Tubbo started moving faster, yanking Tommy along by the arm as they caught up to Philza on the path. Technoblade followed along behind, constantly scanning for danger. Tommy hated being babied, but his brother’s vigilance did make him feel safer. 

Tubbo pointed upward with his free hand, sure enough some lights glowed above the trees, pale and warm. Philza led them off the path, towards a hill overlooking L’Manburg. Even Tommy gasped when they crested it. 

Above L’Manburg hovered beautiful paper lanterns. Each one was floating and spinning gently in the night sky, casting a warm glow down on the town. The city had changed a lot in the last few weeks. It looked so different, Tommy felt a pang for how things had been, then he glanced at Tubbo. His best friend was absolutely beaming in the lantern’s light, blue eyes wide with happy awe.

Tommy felt warmth creep in his chest. Maybe it was nice, having things be so different. Looked like a different place then when… then before. It was good. Wooden platforms and scaffolding formed a base for the structures, which perched around the town center comfortably. As Tommy peered he saw the camarvan in its old place, improved but familiar. Even it was cast in the glow of the festive decorations. 

“Do you remember, Tommy and Techno, when you were young and we all made these one year?” As Tubbo ooh’d and aah’d Philza gently touched Tommy’s shoulder. Tommy was young then, but he remembered crafting them. 

“Yeah, Wilbur’s was the only one that looked fancy, besides yours” Technoblade’s deep voice rose calmly beside Philza, who chuckled. Tommy smirked at the memory.

“As I remember ‘the blade’ kept trying to make his into weapons.” Techno snorted at the reminder.

“It was an innovative design!” His faux indignation only amused Tommy more. 

“Well Tommy,” Philza bumped his arm gently. “You aren’t really one to talk, considering you nearly burnt down the forest.”

“I did not!”

“Oh, you most certainly did. We had to grab buckets of water like a fire brigade while you just laughed like the most gleeful gremlin child. It was then I knew you couldn’t safely be released back into the wild.” Tommy flipped his father off, trying not to laugh at the joke at his expense. Tubbo had no such reservations, the smaller boy was giggling hysterically. 

“Stop it! You weren’t even there!” Tubbo continued to laugh but drifted off, tracing the movements of the lanterns with his finger pointed upwards. 

“Did Wilbur do this?” Tubbo’s voice was soft. Philza’s response matched the tone. 

“Yes, he thought it might be something nice. A good memory for a change.” Tommy wanted to reply derisively, point out that Wilbur was the cause of a lot of those bad memories, but he stopped himself. The lanterns _were_ nice. 

“He set aside some if we want to light them off, what do you say?” Tubbo instantly chirped agreement, happily helping Phil pull the box of supplies from nearby. “They’re mostly built, but you can decorate them if you want.” 

Tommy feigned reluctance as he pulled one from the box, white and red stripped and almost perfectly round. Tubbo grabbed a yellow and green one, oval and tall, happily painting flowers onto it. Techno didn’t move to take one, until Philza dropped a pink one in his hands, rectangular shaped. Tommy couldn’t help but grin as he painted knives on his own, this lantern would be stabbing shit. Philza drew a green and white lantern from the box, gently painting purple wings on its surface. 

It was only after a few minutes that Tommy realized that the lanterns had been made with them in mind. It was obvious now, but… well, he hadn’t expected Wilbur to be that considerate. 

They all finished their decorating and fought playfully about who would get to light theirs first. Eventually Philza solved the issue by declaring he would light all of them, and they would wait to release them at the same time. Tommy gently held his and Tubbo’s high. He knew without asking that Tubbo would want the flame a little bit further away. They shared a grin when the light made their lanterns glow, the patterns and colors casting fanciful shadows against their faces.

“Alright, on the count of three. One, Two, Three.” Tommy couldn’t help but feel a lightness in his chest as the lanterns floated into the night sky. They spun and danced around each other as they rose, the contrasting colors shading the city. 

Tommy noticed a fifth lantern rising from somewhere out of view. It was yellow and white, with a guitar painted across the surface. Somehow it rose with the others, the five lanterns grouping up against the stars. 

He knew whose it was. 

Part of him was happy to see it.

Tommy smiled with the joy of a peaceful night spent with his family.

* * *

Skeppy awoke gasping for air.

Drowning, can’t breathe, lungs filled with dense liquid

Bad is there though

Singing, gentle, safety

Can’t breathe

Calming voice

Singing

Skeppy tried not to hyperventilate as he took stock of his surroundings. He was at home, quartz walls, bed, colorful floors. Oh. 

His breathing got worse as he squinted into the darkened room, he weakly reached out towards an odd shape next to him, and relaxed when he felt warmth. Skeppy took a deep breath as he scooted closer to where Bad lay sleeping. He grabbed his friend’s hand in his own and focused on the here and now. 

You can breathe now. Bad is right here too.

“Skeppy?” A beam of light entered the room as the door opened. Skeppy groaned in response. 

“Is Bad…” Skeppy forced out the words, voice gravely and pained. 

“He didn’t die if that’s what you are asking.” Antfrost padded into the room in near silence, glass clinking as he fussed around on the nightstand. “I didn’t expect you to wake up for a while yet, so I gave him something to help him rest.”

“You,” Skeppy coughed a small laugh, trying to keep breathing steadily. “You drugged him?”

Antfrost shrugged. “I sedated him. He wouldn’t sleep or even lay down. Bad was insistent he would be there and ready when you woke up, but he’s still hurt.” Skeppy considered the words, then rolled over closer to Bad and snuggled back into the pillows and blankets. 

“Wait, Skeppy, I’ve got a regen potion you should drink.”

“Mmmm no.” Skeppy got comfortable, making sure he was still holding Bad’s hand.

“What?”

“I’m asleep, see?” Skeppy fought away a smirk as Antfrost sputtered. 

“You… but… just drink this, please? Then you can go back to sleep.”

“Nope.”

“Why!?” Antfrost raised his voice a little, bewilderment filling his tone. 

“I’m asleep until Bad wakes up.” Skeppy could practically hear Antfrost opening his mouth in protest, sharp teeth clicked together when he decided the battle wasn’t worth fighting. 

No one could beat Skeppy in a battle of wills, except maybe Bad. 

Skeppy tried to settle himself, to ignore the residual feeling of drowning, and rest. Bad would be awake soon and then they both could get to healing. 

Together.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello! I'm sorry that this chapter was so late compared to my regular schedule. There were really two reasons:  
> 1\. I like to have a pretty significant buffer, so I've been working on the next story in this series. I got about 8k words into it before I decided I was completely unhappy with it, so essentially started it over... meaning I was waiting to update this one until I was sure I had a clear direction to go with the next.
> 
> 2\. Uhhh A LOT has happened on the canon smp this week..... and I've had a LOT of inspiration as a result... so I got very distracted in writing one shots..... check them out if you want.... mind the spoiler warnings though.  
> https://archiveofourown.org/works/28583577  
> https://archiveofourown.org/works/28625946
> 
> Thank you for still reading, if you've read this entire note I want you to know I appreciate everyone who reads so incredibly much. Comments are always welcome and enjoyed as well.  
> <3--R&T


	15. After it All

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Healing takes time.  
> It wouldn't be fair to expect differently.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is the last true chapter of this story arc. 
> 
> TW: anxiety, panic attack, flashbacks, referenced violence and injury, referenced abuse and manipulation, referenced death

Tubbo fidgeted with his hands nervously. The brightly painted beehive in front of him looked as friendly as ever, and here in his garden was usually his happy place, that’s why he chose to come out here today in the first place. 

Tubbo was having an especially anxious day. He didn’t think there was any particular reason for it, which somehow made it all the more frustrating. He sighed, again leaning down towards the small pile of wood and kindling, trying to build up the fortitude to light it. Tubbo did this all the time, why was it being so tough today?

Tubbo groaned and flopped onto his back, flowers around his head obscuring his vision slightly. The sun was bright today and wispy clouds gently moved across the sky. A single bumblebee buzzed towards a red flower above his head, landing on it and making the stalk bend a little. Tubbo took deep breaths.

“Hey big man!!” Tubbo jerked and rolled away from the sudden noise, unfortunately, tripping up Tommy in the process and causing the taller boy to fall over into the grass. Tommy tried to catch himself but Tubbo felt a heavy weight land briefly on his chest anyway and—

Trapped

Trapped loud trapped afraid and--

“Tubbo?”

Heavy breathing, Tubbo knew he wasn’t doing a good job keeping it under control.

“I’m sorry big man.” Gentle hands squeezing his own. “Let’s breathe together okay?”

Tubbo did his best to follow his best friend’s breathing and, after a time, he calmed. He looked up at Tommy, trying not to feel ashamed of his outburst. Tommy just looked concerned.

“Bad day?” Once he seemed satisfied with Tubbo’s breathing, Tommy dropped onto his back next to him, ungraciously crushing some flowers. 

“Yeah…” Tubbo heard plants rustle around his head as he nodded.

“Anything happen?” Tubbo sighed heavily, letting himself lay back next to his friend. 

“Nope. Just a hard day for some reason! I just feel like shit Tommy.” Tubbo picked some grass and flowers absentmindedly, tying them together by the stems as he laid on his back. He spat when dirt fell into his mouth. 

“I thought so, I mean, I thought you might be feeling bad today.” Tommy shrugged at Tubbo’s skeptical glance. “It’s hot out and you’re wearing long sleeves.” That was enough explanation. Tubbo usually was fine with his scars now, but they were an unpleasant reminder on the bad days. 

“Yeah.” There was a period of comfortable silence. Tommy broke it as usual. 

“Anyways, I told Techno to fuck off for the day, if that helps.” Tubbo snorted.

“How considerate of you.” Tommy flipped him off. Though sarcastic, Tubbo did appreciate it. One less thing to get his anxiety going today. 

“Speaking of consideration…” Tommy suddenly sounded hesitant, Tubbo glanced over to see his friend’s blue eyes fixed upwards on the sky. 

“I realized, well, I was thinking. Cause you know, on the quest and all that shit, I… I kinda just drug you along, didn’t I?” Tommy stubbornly refused to look at Tubbo, even when the brunette bumped his shoulder. 

Tubbo considered for a moment. “Nah, It’s fine Tommy. I wasn’t going to leave you.”

“I know that. It’s just. Okay.” Tommy finally rolled over and faced Tubbo. “I talked to Bad earlier and he said I should apologize to you for not being considerate and—”

“And you listened to him?!” Tubbo was honestly more shocked by this than anything.

“No, I told him he was an asshole then swore at him ‘til he left.” Tubbo snickered, that sounded more like Tommy. 

“But, now, I’m not saying he’s right, but I was thinking for myself. Big man thoughts. And I realized… I wasn’t really thinking of how you felt about everything.” Tommy looked ashamed of himself, Tubbo lightly placed a haphazard flower crown in his friend’s blond hair. 

“It’s really okay Tommy, there was a lot going on.” Tubbo understood. The trip had been hard for all of them, and Tommy got focused. He was okay to take the backburner for a bit. Backburner? Was that a—

“No, it’s not okay!” Tommy sat up and pulled Tubbo up with him. Tubbo widened his eyes, Tommy looked incredibly sincere. 

“Tubbo, you are my best friend. I’m sorry for not being… I’m sorry for being a dickhead.” Tubbo felt his eyes involuntarily fill with tears. As he sniffled Tommy leaned closer, pulling him into a hug. “I mean it big man.”

Tubbo eventually stopped the gentle crying, smiling up at Tommy. 

“You’re my best friend too Tommy, and I think I can find a way to forgive you.” Tommy stuck his tongue out in response. 

“What do you want from me?”

“Help me harvest honeycomb!” 

Tommy moaned and groaned about having to help, but Tubbo knew he didn’t mean it. The air felt lighter, and as him and Tommy joked around, the day got that much better. 

* * *

Technoblade was nervous. He tried not to give any tells, after all, he had a reputation to uphold. But Philza patted his shoulder anyway so he must have been giving off some sort of vibes. Oh. He realized his hand was gripping his sword hilt tightly. Yeah, that was probably it.

“What do you think Niki made for dinner?” Techno could tell Tubbo was trying to ease the mood, but it wasn’t working. Tommy was stiff and introspective and even Philza had a sort of nervous energy to him. Techno bit the bullet.

“I don’t know, probably bread or something.” Tubbo looked at him quizzically and Techno shrugged. Give him a break, he was trying here.

“Listen, I know I’ve said this already, but none of you have any obligation to be here tonight.” Philza stopped walking and turned to face them. “If you want to leave at any time, no one will blame you or be upset.”

Techno snorted when Tubbo stared at Tommy. Obviously, that was who this was meant for.

“I know.” Tommy sounded determined. “But I do want to go.” Technoblade had no hesitations continuing onward, and Philza started walking again moments later. They were almost to Niki’s bakery too, a warm smell caused Techno to sniff the air. 

“I was right.” He watched all his family turned to look at him. “Bread.”

* * *

Wilbur was possibly more anxious for this evening than anyone. A real sit-down dinner with his whole family to discuss him possibly building a house nearby theirs. There had been other little meetups lately, and Wilbur had really been trying to be a better version of himself. He really, really wanted to make things better. 

“Wilbur, I need you to get out of my kitchen before you hurt yourself.” Niki elbowed him gently with the admonishment. He realized belatedly he had been cutting the same carrot for the last ten minutes. As she hurried him out of the room he passed Fundy, the fox hybrid was grabbing some extra chairs for the dinner table. 

“Hey Wil, give a guy a hand here?” Wilbur obliged willingly.

Everything was set, he knew what to do and what not to do. Wilbur loved his family. He remembered terrible things. He wasn’t going to repeat past mistakes. 

“Hello?” Wilbur let Fundy get the door, seating himself on one side of the table furthest from the door.

In walked his family. Wilbur smiled at Technoblade, the piglin hybrid was absolutely armed to the teeth and wearing full netherite armor. Wilbur remembered enough that he would have found it strange if he wasn’t. Philza entered next, smiling gently at Wilbur before coming to sit across from him. 

Then Tommy and Tubbo. The two entered in sync, Tommy had pursed lips and scanned the room carefully, eyes fixing on Wilbur once he located him. Wilbur just mildly accepted the scrutiny. He had earned it. Tubbo jittered beside Tommy, the brunette was less stiff but seemed to bounce between happiness and anxiety every heartbeat. 

“Hello everyone!” Niki bustled into the room, giving smiles and hug in turn. Some of the tension broke. “If you want to sit down dinner will be ready in just a minute.” Her light voice was almost musical as she placed down plates and silverware, Fundy helping her set the table. 

Once greetings were exchanged and everyone was seated around the table came the most awkward part of the evening. Getting conversation started. 

“So, how are repair efforts going?” Philza graciously opened conversation, nodding at Wilbur, trying to give him a chance to engage. 

“It’s going nicely, we are actually almost done with repair type stuff, so I’ve been working more on projects lately.” Wilbur spoke softer than normal, he noticed Tommy glancing at him.

“Ooooh you should see it!” Niki brightened up “Wil has made all these decorations and flags for the town!” The chatter continued as they ate, light, easy conversation. 

Wilbur couldn’t suppress the smile that constantly shone from his face, it was just so good to be with his family.

* * *

Tommy followed as his family walked the new streets of L’Manburg. It really did look nice, Tommy even caught himself gasping in awe at some of the decorations. It was so completely different that it wasn’t even making him that uncomfortable to be here. 

He almost forgot Wilbur was leading the group until they stopped in front of a watermill overlooking the town. 

“Okay, so I’ve got my current house down here and also some stuff to show you if you want.” Wilbur looked… flustered, like he wasn’t sure if this was a good idea. But Tommy watched Philza gently place a hand on Wil’s arm.

“Let’s see it.” 

Tommy stiffened when he realized they had to go down to get to this place. Tunnels and stone were not where he felt most comfortable, especially not with Wilbur, but he followed anyway. Suddenly there was light, the end of the short tunnel was a grate looking out over the town. Next to the makeshift window was a simple wooden door.

Tubbo hesitated before entering, Tommy paused with him. This could be a trap or some shit. But Philza was there, and Technoblade, and Tubbo. Tommy grabbed Tubbo’s hand and murmured a half-hearted joke.

“This house looks like shit.” They entered together. The first room was plain, stone floors and walls with a few cabinets. The only real things of note were the brewing stands in a row built into one wall. 

“Well, I’ve been keeping busy. Here!” Tommy automatically stepped back when Wilbur approached, but took a deep breath. Wilbur immediately stopped a distance away and held out a couple lightly glowing bottles abashedly. 

“Sorry.” Wilbur sounded sincere, if slightly embarrassed. “I wanted to give you these if you want them.” Tommy eyes the bottles, Tubbo reached forward ahead of him and lightly picked one up, swirling it in front of his eyes.

“Invisibility?”

“Yeah! I remembered you two liked doing things with these and so I had Sam teach me how to make them.” Tubbo handed the bottle of purple-grey liquid to Tommy, a mischievous grin gracing his face. 

Tommy wasn’t going to be convinced so easily. 

“You have something in mind? Some fucking plan you want us to follow?” Tommy knew old paranoia was fueling his words, but Wilbur remembered more, he might…

“No! No not at all, you don’t have to take them… I just thought you might want some.” Wilbur stepped back, opening one of the barrels that had quite a few bottles visible within. “Now that you know where they are you can come get them anytime if you want them, okay?” Tommy hesitantly nodded. Wilbur was acting gentle and kind, Tommy still couldn’t bring himself to trust it fully.

“What’s back here Wil?” Philza gently spoke up from the other side of the room where another wooden door was visible built into the wall.

“That’s actually what I wanted to show you!” Wilbur rushed across the room enthusiastically, opening the door to reveal a warm glow inside. 

Tommy moved into the space with the others. The room was larger than the entry and more furnished. The walls were a dark wood and there were comfortable chairs scattered around. Most noticeably however, were the bookcases covering the walls. 

“A library?” Tubbo walked in without hesitation, Tommy fought the urge to pull him back to his side. 

“Yes! I wanted to keep remembering, so I kept asking people for all the books they had about things here and made a library. Go ahead, you can look at any you want!” Wilbur was obviously delighted to show off the room and it was infectious. Even Techno looked less sullen. 

Tubbo started flitting around the room, tracing book spines with his finger. Tommy kept an eye on Wilbur, but his brother moved to a chair in the far corner, sitting still and smiling contentedly. 

“LOOK!” Tommy jumped when Tubbo shouted, but groaned when a thin book was pressed into his hands. 

“What is it Tub—OH!” Tommy stared at the priceless treasure he was holding. “The declaration of independance? I thought it was lost a long time ago…”

“I found it!” Wilbur was beaming with pride, but stayed sitting. Tommy appreciated it. 

“Wow.” Tommy thumbed through the document delicately, mouthing the words as he went. “Do you remember this?” He looked up and met Wilbur’s eyes. His brother smiled back.

“Yes, I do. The books have really helped, in fact, I remember a lot more now. Dream says that soon I might be able to set a respawn point.” Tommy felt a gentle warmth fill his chest. It was so different from the angry heat, but it wasn’t unwelcome. 

“What else do you have in here?” Tommy was aware Philza and Techno stilled as he addressed Wilbur, but he ignored them. He was a big man, he would talk to whomever he wanted.

Wilbur stood very slowly and moved to a shelf nearby. 

“Well, I’ve got this one!” Wilbur gently handed over another book. Embossed on the cover were the words ‘The L’Manburg National Anthem’. Tubbo peered over Tommy’s shoulder as he opened the cover. 

There was a moment where Tommy just read the words in silence. Then he read them again. By the third time he was having to blink away tears.

“That’s nice big man.” Tommy used the nickname unconsciously as he handed the precious book back to his brother. Wilbur gently returned it to the shelf. 

“Can I get you anything while you’re here? I have some chocolates.” At the mention of chocolate Tubbo’s eyes widened. Wilbur left the room happily to retrieve them.

“Look at any books you want while I’m gone okay?” When Wilbur left the room Tommy and Tubbo continued to scour the books on the walls. It was bringing back memories. But Tommy’s eyes were drawn to one book in particular that stood out. Rather than being on a shelf it simply sat on one of the small tables next to a lantern. The cover was soft leather with no title visible. 

Tommy opened to the front page curiously. 

‘Things I Remember’ By Wilbur Soot (Ghostbur)

The word ‘Ghostbur’ was in different handwriting and the nickname made Tommy snicker, he would have to ask who came up with that. 

He flipped to the next page, it felt kinda intrusive looking into what might as well have been his brothers journal, but he did say to read ANYTHING he wanted. Plus, Tommy felt justified snooping at this point.

The first page was titled ‘Things to Remember’ But most of the entries were illegible, scratched out presumably when Wilbur remember them.

“What’ve you got?” Tubbo hopped on the arm of the chair next to him, curiously eyeing the book.

Tommy didn’t answer audibly, worried Philza would take it away, but let Tubbo see over his arm.

The third page was a simple list.

\- The smell of bread (it is good)

\- L'manberg

\- The Revolution

\- Bullying Tommy (He's a child)

\- Sparring with Techno as a kid (he always won)

\- The wind

\- Being president

\- People cheering for me

\- Niki and her bakery

\- The van where it all started

Tommy hummed to himself as he read. He elbowed Tubbo when the brunette snickered, he knew it was about the child bit. Tommy impatiently waited for Tubbo to catch up in reading, then flipped the page. 

\- Tubbo building everything

\- Phil protecting me

The writing from this point on was scratchier, done with a different writing instrument or maybe more rushed.

\- Philza stabbing me to death with a sword

\- A large explosion

\- ~~Winning the elections~~ No. Losing the election and running away

\- A ravine

\- Techno joining

Tubbo stifled a gasp at some of the entries on this page. Tommy started to feel a little guilty for intruding like this, but kept turning pages anyway. The handwriting started to return to its previous neatness a few pages later.

\- TNT (From Dream)

\- Tunnels

\- Arrows

\- Yelling at Tommy

\- Being terrible to Tubbo

\- Fear of losing power

\- Hiding on top of a building

\- A dog?

\- So. Many. Potatoes.

\- Killing Badboyhalo

\- Philza teaching me about plants

\- Regret

The rest of the pages looked to be similarly filled, but Wilbur reentered the room before Tommy could read them. The eldest brother looked briefly surprised to see what him and Tubbo were holding, then just shrugged and smiled slightly.

“Here.” A tray was placed down on the table beside them, small fudge squares arranged neatly.

Tommy closed the book and waited for Wilbur to get angry. He didn’t. Slowly Tommy started to relax again, taking a fudge bite cautiously. After a moment Wilbur spoke contemplatively. 

“I remember a lot more than what I’ve written down there now. It’s more of an… outline.” Tommy nodded at his brother, still expecting some negative reaction. None came.

After some minutes of silence Tubbo spoke up around a mouthful of chocolate.

“Did you leave this book out on purpose?” Wilbur shrugged ruefully.

“No, but I also didn’t hide it. I figured… I know you can’t trust me. But I really do want to be better. Tommy, I remember now a lot of the terrible things I did. And I HATE them.” Wilbur’s voice broke and his eyes started watering. 

“You don’t owe me anything, least of all forgiveness. I’m just… really happy to be here with you all now.” Wilbur wiped his eyes and looked around the room, smiling at Philza and Technoblade. 

He was Wil. He was his brother. Tommy hated him. Tommy missed him. Tommy—

Tommy threw himself out of the chair and punched Wilbur across the jaw, everyone jumped to their feet, Tommy heard Philza crossing the room towards him.

“That’s for being an asshole!” Wilbur rubbed his jaw blankly. 

Tommy moved closer, then threw himself in his eldest brother’s arms. 

“I missed you too.” Tommy whispered, holding back as much of the emotion in his voice as he could. Wilber held his arms limply for a moment, seemingly stunned when Tommy fell into them, then Tommy felt them wrap around him. They were hesitant and gentle, but they were warm with the woolen sweater that now encased both of them. Wilbur’s chin came to rest on the top of his head. 

“I love you Toms. And I’m so, so sorry.” 

There was a moment of peace before Tommy felt an additional pair of arms wrap around his waist from the side. Tubbo curled into both of them, less focused on hiding his tears than Tommy was. Tommy moved to disengage from the hug, but found himself firmly wrapped up from behind as Philza joined in, somehow holding all of them. Last was Technoblade, dragged in by Philza and begrudgingly allowing himself to join the embrace. 

Tommy felt someone’s tears drip onto his hair.

He decided to wait until later to complain. 

He was with his family after all. They were together. Safe and warm. 

It was going to be okay.

Might as well enjoy the moment.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Wow, it's hard to believe this story has drawn to a close. I so hope you enjoyed this story arc.  
> Though this is the last true chapter, there will be an epilogue posted hinting at the next story arc, so stay tuned if you're interested in this AU. 
> 
> I am NOT done with this world!! I have more stories to tell and have started writing for them already. It may be a few weeks before they're ready to be posted, but if you liked my writing I have a lot more to read on my profile and plans for other stories to post in the meantime. 
> 
> I really hope you enjoyed this story, I love to read people's comments and reactions.  
> Thank you so much for reading.  
> <3--R&T


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